Page 49

“So, what’s the cover story today?” he asks softly, moving behind me and kissing the tops of my shoulders as he washes my back. “What are we telling your friends?”

“Well,” I mutter, “I thought we could tell them the truth…”

“The truth?” Ben laughs.

“Yeah, figured I’d start with you stealing $600 from me, and then I’ll explain how I kidnapped you. We’ll finish with the part where you sucke d me off in the back of a car.” I look over my shoulder to grin at him, and he lets out a loud, barking laugh.

“You’re leaving out the shadow-wielding demon girlfriend.”

“We’ll have to keep up the whole ‘Annika from Sweden’ bit, but one of my friends apparently saw you and me in the park, and I had to say you were my roommate. I don’t want to lie to them, but…”

“So…don’t lie,” Ben says, pulling my arm gently and turning me around so our chests press together. His hand drifts up to my cheek and his dark eyes flicker around my face, a tiny crease between his eyebrows. “Tell them we’re together. Tell them I’m your…boyfriend.”

My breath catches in my throat as he leans forward and kisses my jaw. “Is that the truth?”

“God, I hate how high school it sounds, but…it is if you want it to be…” Ben says, and I can practically feel the electricity shooting through my body as our eyes meet.

“I do.” I pause and clear my throat. “I do want it to be true. I just…”

“What?”

“I’m anxious, I guess.”

“About introducing me to people that way? I thought your friends knew you’d dated men.”

“It’s not that,” I sigh. “I was with Ros for so long, and we almost got engaged. It’s only been a few months since we broke up.”

“You think they might judge you for moving on too fast?”

“I think…it’s just one of those things my brain is lying to me about,” I explain. “My friends have never been anything but loving and supportive. They liked Ros, but…they weren’t exactly devastated when we broke up. She wasn’t really ‘their type’, I guess.”

Ben smirks. “Am I their type?”

“Yes,” I laugh. “So much so that I’m actually a little worried about keeping you all under control.”

He keeps smirking, but falls silent and grabs the shampoo bottle.

“You wanna know what I th ink?” he says at last. “I think you’re worried that if you introduce me that way to your friends, you’ll eventually have to introduce me that way to your family, and you’re scared about how they might react. ”

“I’m not ashamed of–”

“You’re too worried about what other people think, osito ,” Ben says with a soft smile. “I met your family, and I can tell they’ll love you no matter what. Even your hard-ass Catholic dad.”

I drop my eyes to the water circling the drain, shamefully remembering what Ben told us about his own family not speaking to him. We finish showering in silence, then get out and dry off.

“You should know, Ben, that it’s not about you,” I tell him once we’re in the bedroom getting dressed. “It’s me, and my insecurities, and my own bullshit. You’re…perfect.” I wave my hand at him, and his face splits back into a playful grin.

“I know, and I promise I can win over anyone who has doubts about us, for any reason. Alright? Let me worry about that.”

I pull on a clean pair of jeans and then grab a nice button-down shirt from the closet.

When I look around the room, I realize how much better everything looks.

Dirty clothes are in the hamper, clean stuff is (mostly) put away, the bed has an actual sheet and comforter on it, and the nightstand isn’t cluttered with half-empty water glasses and food wrappers anymore.

And Ben didn’t actually do any of it. Just by being himself, he pulled me out of the pit I was in.

I can never fully repay him for that, but I know how I’d like to start trying.

“You’re already worried about keeping Annie here, and protecting me.

I can’t let you take something else on,” I tell him, putting my hand on his arm and looking him in the eye so he knows I mean it.

“If this is a way for me to show how much I care about you, then I’ll do it.

I’d do anything for you, Ben. I hope you know that.

” He kisses me, deep and slow and tender, one hand wrapping around my waist and pulling me into him, while the other grips the back of my neck. I never want it to end.

“We are going to be late, my darlings,” says Annie, leaning on the door frame and watching us with a smile on her face.

High-waisted, acid-wash flare jeans hug her hips and thighs perfectly, and she has on a blue sweater with a little white cat on the front.

Her hair is already dry and falls over her shoulders in two braided pigtails.

She looks fucking adorable. Ben holds his arm out, and she comes over to lean against him, taking my hand too.

“You ready?” I ask her.

She screws up her face and laughs. “I hope I can manage the same accent as before. What is our story this time?”

“You’re still Annika,” says Ben, “the exchange student from Sweden or wherever.”

“But, when we meet my friends,” I say slowly, unsure of how she might react, “I want to introduce Ben as my boyfriend.” Annie looks surprised for a moment and glances between us, then her face falls.

“Of course,” she mutters. “That is…that makes sense. Shall we go now?” She turns and walks out of the bedroom, folding her arms across her chest.

“Fuck,” Ben sighs. “ Mi amor , wait!” He throws me a pained look and follows her down the hall, but I stay in the bedroom, my body suddenly heavy. I don’t know what to do for her, how to make her feel better about this. I’m not sure if I even can.

I move to the door and look around the corner to see how Ben is handling it.

Annie leans against the kitchen counter while he stands in front of her, one hand on her arm.

With the other, he points to his heart, then to her, then down the hall toward me.

Every emotion imaginable flashes across his face as she replies and they keep talking.

Hurt, fear, love, sadness, exasperation.

Finally, Annie drops her face into her hand and Ben wraps his arms around her, continuing to murmur softly in her ear.

He looks up and notices me watchi ng, then jerks his head.

As I approach, I see tears in his eyes. Without thinking, without considering the consequences, I wrap my arms around both of them and breathe them in.