Page 9 of I Love You, I Hate You

@Noraephronwasagenius

Luke and I are just . . . whatever, it’s not going to be an in-person thing and I KNOW how you guys feel about that, but we have an arrangement that works.

@MadisonHughes95

I maintain that an arrangement like that that doesn’t include some form of internet sex, either text based or facetime based, is pointless

@Keanuisadreamboat

No one asked, Maddy.

@Noraephronwasagenius

(Thanks, Reiko)

And I don’t know if the problem is Luke, because Luke is just . . . Luke, for me. This guy is another issue.

@Neverthelesskararesisted

But what IS the issue there?

@Noraephronwasagenius

Fine. I might want to bang him again but idk if I CAN, what with the whole “he is suing my company” thing.

@Keanuisadreamboat

So bang him, but like, ethically. Meaning: don’t talk about work, keep your papers locked up and your laptop password protected, and just don’t tell anyone.

To be fair idk exactly how ethical that is, but damn girl, you’ve earned this.

@Neverthelesskararesisted

I second that. And didn’t you say you have to like, REALLY try to get disbarred? So you’re fine. Get laid, enjoy it, and leave a good Yelp review.

@Noraephronwasagenius

What sort of Yelp is there for sex?

@Neverthelesskararesisted

It’s an app I’m going to make, just as soon as I learn how to make apps.

Victoria shook her head, still chuckling. She had found these women slowly, over the course of a few years on Twitter, but they were like family to her. The talk in the group chat turned back to Maddy’s upcoming exams (she wasn’t ready and was melting down) and whether or not Reiko should move in with her boyfriend of three years (he was a keeper, they were all unanimous on that, but she was just a little terrified of the permanence.) If the chat thought she should stress less about the chances of hooking up with Owen again, she would take their advice to heart. She found a Hallmark movie on TV and put it on for background noise while she laughed and talked with her friends. Onscreen, a blandly pretty white woman found out her job was sending her to her hometown for completely contrived reasons, while her high-school boyfriend—also blandly pretty, also white, but a baker instead of a vaguely defined businesswoman—wrestled with getting his orders out on time. It was the perfect, low-stress movie to watch while she bantered with her friends. Her mother might not understand it, but this was Victoria’s life and she was happy with it.

Direct Messages: Nora @Noraephronwasagenius

@Lukethebarnyardcat

How pathetic is it to get into your career just to piss off your dad?

And in the interest of full disclosure, roughly 30% of everything I do is just to make someone mad. Or at least annoy them. Idk why. Does this mean I need therapy?

@Noraephronwasagenius

Honestly? I’m the same way. And I think we could all use some therapy, tbh.

Chapter Four