Page 61
Story: Make Your Change
Given the circumstances, it feels like there has never been any missed time between us. Matteo immediately became attached to me and I to him. The thought of him not being here every single day had already been weighing heavily on me, and hearing this admission from him is only compounding the weight.
“I’ll talk to her, at least to see if you can stay here instead of Bella’s, okay?”
That sweet smile spreads across his face again as he nods eagerly. “Okay, Dad. Thanks.”
“And no more climbing on the counter. I don’t want you to fall and get hurt.”
He tips his chin. “Yes, sir.”
I follow Matteo as he walks into the living room and make sure he’s situated before I head upstairs to find Andi. I take the stairs two at a time up to the second floor, breeze past Matteo’s room first, then reach Andi’s. Although, I’m not sure I wouldeven call this her room anymore. Her things may occupy the space, but she’s been occupying mine instead.
She doesn’t hear me or see me at first and I take a moment to stand in the doorway, completely unnoticed. I drink her in, my eyes trailing over the side of her face, down her straight nose, over the curves of her lips. I let them continue to roam, memorizing the planes of her body. She’s wearing a yellow dress that hugs her torso and flares out around her hips.
I watch her fold a pair of pants, laying them on the bed before turning back around to reach for something in one of her drawers. Her body falls rigid, head whipping to the side as she catches sight of me from the corner of her eye.
“Oh, you startled me,” she laughs quietly, lifting her hand to her chest. “Hi.”
I smile at her, leaning against the door jamb. “Hi.” My eyes scan the room before resting on hers once more. “Whatcha doin’?”
“Packing.” She gives me a small smile. “They called and said the house is safe for us to move back in now.”
“Oh.” I run my tongue over my top teeth. “Seems like you’re in a rush to get out of here.”
She purses her lips, blowing out a soft breath. “I figured you would want us out of your space.”
“Quite the opposite, actually.” I step closer, the distance between us vanishing as I lift my hand to cup the side of her face. “You’re already everywhere and I want to keep it that way.”
Her lips part, a breath escaping her. She stares up at me, her eyes searching mine as if she’s looking for the answer to the question she hasn’t asked.
“I want you and Matteo to stay.” I pause, my thumb running along the soft skin on her cheek. I wet my lips and swallow back the emotion that wells in my throat at the thought of everythingMatteo said in the kitchen. I want to ask her to move here, but that feels like too much too soon.
I have to start slow, because I’m treading in unknown territory. I don’t know what the hell I’m doing here. I don’t want to ask her to upend her entire life to move here and then what. What if things don’t work out with us? Not that we’re together or have even talked about anything like that.
But what happens if I can’t be enough for her? What happens if I can’t give her what she deserves? I’m not sure I can take the pressure of being held to an expectation and then not meeting it.
I know what Andi deserves and I don’t think she will settle for anything less. If they were to move here and she were to move onto someone else, I would have that constantly in my face.
And I can’t predict how I would handle something like that.
“You want us to stay here with you?”
“Yes.” I nod at her, lifting my other hand to her waist as I pull her flush against my body. She tips her head back farther, her eyes still fixated on mine. “I want you in my space. I want you and Matteo here when I wake up in the morning and I want you both here when I go to sleep at night.” I pause, a smirk pulling on my lips. “And I want you in my fucking bed, not in the room across the hall.”
“But only until we get the house listed, right?”
I tilt my head to the side. “What would it take to get you to stay longer than that?”
“We’re not together, Carson. I can’t live here forever. I have a life in Starling Ridge.”
Fuck. There it is. The cold glaring truth that I find myself wanting to change. “I know, but what if you didn’t have to? You can stay here and you wouldn’t have to work. We can enroll Matteo in school here.”
Her eyes widen before she narrows them. “And what about us? It doesn’t feel right to just move in with you like that when we aren’t together.”
“I know,” I murmur, my eyelids falling shut as I lean forward, resting my forehead on hers. “I—we can figure it all out.”
“We’re doing things a little backwards, don’t you think?” The corners of her lips lift into a devastating grin. “We slept together, had a kid and now I’m staying in your house?”
A chuckle escapes me and I lift my other hand to the opposite side of her face. “I think that’s just us, Trouble. Unconventional, but it works.”
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