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“Hang on, so that was your whole plan for revenge?” I say. “To smuggle weed in Big Aunt’s hat?”
“Kind of a pathetic plan,” Fourth Aunt says smugly. God, the woman can be obnoxious. But she’s right. As far as revenge goes, it is pretty tame.
Ama glares at her. “Of course not just that! You—” she snaps at Big Uncle, who flinches. “You suppose to die!”
Whoa. We all stare at them in horror. Okay, this is a lot more hard-core than I was expecting.
“Wah, you going to kill own son to frame us?” Second Aunt says, her expression a mixture of horror and awe.
“No,” Staphanie groans. “Of course not. Ama watchedGone Girland was very inspired by it, and we thought maybe we could do something like that. Big Uncle was supposed to go missing in the middle of your wedding and we were going to pin it on you and get the cops to investigate you and your family. We figured you’re such ruthless killers the cops were bound to find something on you.”
“Operation Gone Uncle,” Fourth Aunt says, and laughs. Nobody else laughs along with her. “Come on, that was a good one.”
My head is spinning. “So Big Uncle was going to fake his own death? How does that even work? That’s such a long-term plan. Was he ever going to come back to life?”
“He suppose to hide with our family here,” Ama grumbles.
“You have family here?” Big Aunt says.
“Of course. My sister husband nephew cousin punya cousin,” Ama says.
Big Aunt nods. “Ah, close family.”
“So he was supposed to hide with your relatives and then what? Just live out the rest of his life here?” I say, aghast.
Staphanie frowns at me. “Of course not. We were going to make it look like he was kidnapped by you and your family and then afterward, when you’re all in prison, he was going to be ‘found’ all tied up in an abandoned house or something. That was why we decided to do it during your wedding. Well, that, and also when we found out you were getting married, we sort of—uh—booked the wedding before having a plan. We knew we’d be able to come up with something if we were able to control the day. Anyway, Big Uncle was going to pick a fight with one of you during cocktail hour and we were going to steal into your hotel room and make it look like there had been a struggle before Big Uncle disappeared.”
“Jesus,” Nathan says.
“But then Second Uncle went missing—”
“You suppose to find him!” Ama barks at Big Uncle, who flinches. “Such small thing also you cannot do.”
Big Uncle moans into his gag and looks so contrite that, despite myself, I feel bad for the guy.
“It’s not his fault we kicked his ass,” Fourth Aunt says.
Staphanie takes a deep breath. “Anyway, Second Uncle and Big Uncle went missing, and then the fascinator went missing too... I don’t know. We panicked. So at the last minute we got Third Uncle to pretend that he was kidnapped by you so we’d get your rooms searched. We didn’t think—”
“No offense, but your plan has some pretty glaring holes,” Fourth Aunt says.
“I know, okay?” Staphanie snaps. “It wasn’t easy to come up with a plan to take you people down, and this was the best we could come up with. We were hurting and desperate and we just wanted to—I don’t know—make you all pay for what you did to Ah Guan.”
“I can’t believe you went to all that length to frame us.” Honestly, I don’t know if I’m amazed or horrified.
“Ah Guan my only grandson,” Ama says suddenly, starting to cry again. Despite everything that’s happened, it’s torture seeing this powerful, haughty old woman being reduced to nothing but sorrow. “We do anything for him.”
At this, all of the fight leaks out of me. I can sense the same happening to Ma and the aunties. Because of course they would do anything for him, exactly the same way that Ma and my aunts would do—and have done—for me. No crime is too big to commit if it means saving us. Any plan, even a terrible, flimsy one, is enough for them to act upon.
“You all kill him, why? Just because he steal some jewelry from you? Jewelry worth kill him for?”
“That wasn’t why,” I whisper.
“He such a good boy—”
“That wasn’t why!” This time, my voice comes out so loud it booms like thunder. I force myself to keep going, even though it means I’ll be shattering the broken remains of Ama’s heart. “Ah Guan died because he was trying to assault me. He was driving and didn’t stop when I asked him to, then he took me to an abandoned area, and—god, I was so scared. I Tased him and we crashed and—” My voice cracks then. Nathan’s arm tightens reassuringly around my shoulders.
“You Tased him?” Staphanie says. Realization dawns on her face. “When we were at the airport, you said your Taser had once saved your life. Were you referring to him?” I nod, and she looks up at the ceiling, blinking back tears. “He was going to—um, he was gonna—”