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Chapter Fifteen

Birch

“Idon't remember anythingelse yet, all I have is what I wrote in my diary.” Swallowing hard, her words came out scratchy and soft. “Now it's your turn, what happened to me, how did I end up here like this?”

Her voice was a whisper as I stared at her hands. They were shaking, trembling with such force I half expected her fingers to break off. I had never seen them shaking like that before, and for some reason I couldn't take my eyes off them.

My head was a fucking mess. To imagine what it had been like for her to watch her parents get slaughtered, knowing that it was my father who had wielded the gun that destroyed her world. There would never be enough apologies I could ever give her that would validate his actions.

I could tell her I was sorry over and over again, I could grovel at her feet and promise her endless love and unbridled devotion, and that still wouldn't be enough. Nothing would ever be enough.

But I was willing to spend the rest of my life trying to make up for it. That's what I had to give her; my heart, my soul, my everything. She could have all of it if it would bring her a sliver of happiness.

“Birch?”

“What?” I asked, my attention totally drawn to the spastic muscles in her hands and rambling thoughts inside my head. I wasn't focused on her like I should have been.

“You said you'd give me answers, so answer me.”

How about I show you.

“Come on.” Standing up off the floor, I threw on my clothes as she watched me with questions in her gaze.

“What? Where are we going?”

“Get dressed.”

“Why aren't you answering me?” Pulling her shirt over her head, she slipped her long lean legs into her pants.

My eyes licked her calves and up her thighs. Her supple skin glistened in the soft light of the room, as her plump ass peeked out from beneath the curves of her hips. If we weren't knee deep in this horrible situation, I'd fuck her again.

All I wanted was to go back to us, to what we had before this rain of shit came toppling down. It was perfect, our life was great. I had a woman who would do anything for me, and I would do anything for her.

Now I felt like all of that was gone, and I feared we'd never get it back.

The truth. . . All she wants is the truth.

'She heard it from me. . .'my father's voice boomed in my ears as the weight of what he said clicked on the light.

It wasn't easy for me to explain it, to put it into words that would make sense. But if I showed her, if I took her back to that place, if I gave her more than just an explanation, maybe she'd get what she wanted all along;her own memories.

She had the first half, she was finally able to tear off a small sample and free it from its cage. There was more she needed, and finding it herself was all she ever really wanted. I wanted to help her with that, I wanted to give her back her past.

“Just come with me, I want to show you something.” Flapping my fingers, I tilted my head. “Please.”

Her eyes questioned me as they peered deep into my mind. She was trying to figure out what I was up to, just like she had so many other times over the years.

I felt like I was looking back into the eyes of that young girl, wary and unsure of what I was up to.

Hesitantly, she reached her fingers out, and I latched my hand around hers, helping her to her feet. “There's something you need to see.”

“What is it?”

“Something I owe you—something I should have shown you a long time ago.” Holding her hand in mine, it felt smaller than I remembered. Her fingers were thin and slender, twining like a vine around a branch.

Cyprus kept her head down, something she seemed to do a lot of lately. Before all of this, she walked tall, with her head held high. But now, now the black hole that circled her past was sucking her inside.

Her entire body showed the stress and strain of the lie she had finally discovered. And I hated it. I wanted her back, I wanted the woman I had fallen in love with back by my side. I was missing her more and more by the minute.