Page 99 of With Stars in Her Eyes

Courtney must have read the brimming realization on my face because she took a careful step forward. “I can explain.”

I backed away so quickly my back hit the wall behind me. Being trapped between drywall and a hot woman had never seemed so utterly unpleasant. “Y-You told me you played in a… wait. You told me—”

“Everything I told you was true.” Courtney exhaled, her breasts lifting and lowering beneath that periwinkle-blue bra. If what I thought was happening was actually happening, I would probably leave here and that periwinkle bra would probably haunt me forever like some lacy lingerie-style white whale. I would end up ruined like every other shriveled-up sex-deprived sailor thinkinga manatee was a mermaid because I was that desperate for sex that even blubber could be mistaken for breasts.

I had reached the blubber-breasts phase of spiraling.

A bad sign.

“You might’ve left out a few mighty massive details here and there, Courtney Starling. Starling… that’s a bird too. Is that where the name ‘Kestrel’ came from? The bird thing. Holy shit. People on Reddit are saying you cowrote half of the Violet Trikes’ next album. There are all these rumorsyoufinally have an album coming out. Everyone’s trying to figure out where you… Oh my god, I’m such anidiot.”

“Thea…”

“I listened to goddamn ‘Gilded Shadows’ a million times the days after it dropped. I know every word, and—”

An unexpected hint of a smile tugged at a corner of Courtney’s mouth.

No. I was not in the mood to make her smile. I was pissed. I’d hummed the cello solo part of that song when I was sad for months after it came out. Now it turned out the cellist/songwriter/singer was a foot away from me, and for some reason I was absolutely livid about it.

“Thea, I—”

“How did you not tell me? Where’s your electric cello? Why haven’t I seen it? Why do you just have the other one downstairs?”

“The regular one fits in better with my overall vibe here.” Courtney reached toward me.

“Jokes? Really?” I shook off her touch even though part of me still craved it and looked out the window again. I couldn’t see him anymore.Good.Maybe he left.

“I had no idea you even knew who Demetrius is or Kestrel was.” Courtney’s eyes were wide. “Last night though… Please, I can exp—”

“Is.” I pulled away.

“What?”

“Who Kestrelis.Because you’re her and she’s you and—” Ijolted as a muffled, incomprehensible voice called from down the hallway.

“Oh, fuck.” Courtney flinched.

“How’d he get in the house?”

“Shit. Sam must be here. She probably let him in. We all went to school together.” She gripped her head. “Fuck.”

I was torn. Seeing Courtney so stressed sent a sharp pain in my chest, but I was still too angry at all the omissions and possible lies to hang around and process exactly how oblivious I had been. Luckily, there was another window on the far wall in Courtney’s room that opened to the side of the house with a conveniently placed tree.

“You go talk to him.”

“You should stay so you can meet—”

“I’m not meeting Demetrius Adeyemi looking like someone in one of those shows where the characters have been lost out in the woods for two weeks, eating tree bark.” I unlatched the window with a flick of my fingers that broke one of my nails.

More voices.

“He can wait. Please let me explain.” Courtney wrapped a blanket around herself. I opened the window. The temperature had apparently dropped forty degrees overnight because Kansas weather was a shit show.

Courtney closed the window. “Fuck, it’s freezing out, Thea. Why’re you—”

“Have you ever lied to me? It’s a yes-or-no question.”

Her eyebrows knitted together, mouth tightening around an admission hiding behind pouting lips.