Page 103 of Uprising

She nods and I get up, leaving them to it. I can’t sit here, I can’t think in her presence because the guilt is overwhelming.

I did this. I left her with Otto. Knowingly left her with a monster. What else did I expect? What other outcome would there be but this?

I stalk back down the corridor, clenching my fists. We need to work out next steps. We need to...

“Daddy?”

I pause seeing Lara poking her head around the door. She’s in her pjs so she’s clearly woken up with all the commotion going on.

“You okay Sweetpea?” I’ve not been spending as much time with her as I’d like. I sat down, explained it, explained that I had to work to get mummy back. I know she understands but that doesn’t make it any better.

Tia’s sister has been watching over her, babysitting her. I’m grateful for her help and I resent it all the same. It should be me, me and Rose, looking after our daughter together.

Every night I can, I sleep with her curled up in my arms. Most night she wakes from the nightmares and I’m there to soothe her and make it better. She’s starting to laugh now. She’s starting to come back but I don’t doubt she’s going to need some sort of counselling, as Rose most likely will as well.

“They’re saying Aunty Sofia is here.” She says.

“Who is saying that?” I ask.

She chews her lip. “I heard them daddy. Is she back? Can I see her?”

“She’s resting Sweetpea. She’s not very well so she needs to sleep for a bit.”

“Did they hurt her too?” She asks.

I wince at how normal she makes it sound. As if any of this is normal. I scoop her up into my arms. Yeah she is getting heavier and I’m relieved to feel it.

“She’ll be okay Lara. She just needs a little time. Just like you did.”

She nods before leaning against my shoulder.

“Shall we get a snack? A midnight treat?” I ask.

“Cake?” She says hopefully which makes me laugh.

We don’t have all that much cake. At least not the fancy ones we had back at home. Here it’s mainly Victoria sponges and pudding. Things that are easy to whip up and make on mass.

I carry her into the canteen, put her onto a bench and then go get something from the counter.

Even this is starting to feel normal, that living in some sort of commune is how we’ve always been.

I grab two bowls, treacle pudding and custard. Extra sugar I guess but I know Lara won’t complain.

When I put it in front of her, her eyes literally light up. “This is a big snack daddy.”

“Yeah?” I smile. “Wanna see if you can manage it all for me?”

“I will do my best.” She says picking up the spoon that looks so big in her hand.

I plant a kiss on her head at those words. “You always do.”

She smiles at me before tucking in and for a minute I let myself just enjoy this moment, enjoy the fact that my child is safe, is with me. That we got her out before Darius could seriously hurt her.

“Roman.”

I look around as Holden walks up to me with a look I definitely do not like. I know it’s got nothing to do with Sofia so that helps.

“What is it?” I ask infinitely aware that my daughter is here and I don’t want her to hear anything that might traumatise or scare her further.