Page 5 of Unfaithfully Yours

FOUR

Ryan

We were having dinner and drinks at Dave's place to celebrate his birthday. His girlfriend Deb was a baker and had made an assortment of canapés and puff pastries that were way too fancy for the likes ofus . They were being devoured along with plenty of beer.

The foosball table had been in full swing for over an hour now.

Dave and Kamran were playing and Kamran was getting inexplicably angry every time he lost. He shouldn't have been so surprised.

Dave always won.He was the most competitive person in the world and I'd yet to see him lose a game of anything .

But every time he scored a goal, Kamran cursed, gritted his teeth and tried harder.

It could have been played off as friendly competition, but it wasn't. Even if the others didn’t see it, I knew he was worked up all the way to full blown anger.

I could tell by the tense line of his shoulders, the muscle ticking in his jaw, the fire in his incredible eyes.

Melissa was sitting at the island, chatting with Deb, looking happy as a clam, giggling more and more as the wine kicked in.

It was weird to look at her and remember what Kamran had said.

Knowing that she was going behind his back with someone else…

it took a special sort of person to start a full-on affair with someone and I’d never thought Melissa, of all people, was that type.

Ollie was sitting next to me, rambling on about the supremacy of Star Trek over Star Wars and the impact that it had on our daily existence—because this was what he thought everyone should hear about almost every time he got drunk or had a joint.

He took a long puff and then began his usual spiel about e-readers.

Having heard it one too many times, I nodded at all the appropriate moments while my mind was a million miles away. My gaze constantly sought Kamran out.

It was unavoidable, really. I didn't know how everyone didn't constantly look at him.

With clear skin and a mess of shiny loose curls that somehow always hung in an artful mess around his face, those eyes that were the most remarkable shade of green I had ever seen in person, like sea foam, surrounded by thick dark lashes that would have made him look feminine if not for the square jaw and dark stubble.

As far as I was concerned, the man was a work of art.

It was crazy that he was here, living a normal life in a small city in BC instead of living it up in Hollywood, or something. God knew he was attractive enough for it.

But he seemed to think he was your average working class guy—the type who’d played football in college and now had a pickup truck and a house with his wife.

His childhood home and parents were only a thirty minute drive away and his mom, who made the best middle-eastern food I’d ever tried, not to mention an apple pie that outdid any other. Seriously. Deb wished.

Just then, Dave scored a goal and Kamran hit his handles in frustration, making all of his little players spin.

“For fuck's sake!” he shouted, finally letting the brewing anger free.

That drew everyone’s attention but he didn’t acknowledge anyone. Instead, he just marched away, flopping onto the armchair opposite to me and Ollie.

“Aw,” Dave whined. “Come back. I was having fun kicking your ass.”

Kamran ignored him, breathing deeply for a minute before fixing his glare on me and Ollie instead.

“You two still coming out tomorrow?” he asked.

“For what?” Ollie asked.

“Night out,” Kamran said, his sullen expression intensifying at having to explain.

“Oh yeah. I mean, I’m not as young as I used to be, but if you want to buy the rounds, I’ll suffer a second hangover in one weekend for you.”

Kamran rolled his eyes.

“Fine. Whatever. It’s on me. I just need a night out,” he muttered.

“I’ll be there too,” Dave called over.

“I didn’t ask you,” Kamran retorted and fixed his eyes on me. “What about you Ryan? You still coming?”

I nodded and that seemed to mollify him even though he’d had nothing to worry about. I never let him down if I could help it. That was just what it was like when you loved someone. They always came first, even if the feelings weren’t reciprocated. I’d learned that a long time ago.

Kamran may not love me the way that I loved him, but that was a non-issue at this point. I didn’t love him just because I wanted him to love me back. I loved him just because he was Kamran.

There was nothing I could do about it and nothing I would do about it.

Right now, I was just glad that he still wanted me there. I’d been nervous as hell for this get together, but when Kamran had walked in, he’d just fist pumped me like nothing had happened and walked past me.

Ollie got up then, futilely challenging Dave to a game of darts. The wall was already covered in pock marks, none of them from Dave.

I took the opportunity that I’d been aching for all evening; a moment with just me and Kamran. I wanted to suss him out, to make sure that he was okay and that we really were still good. As soon as we were alone though, he started tapping his foot, looking everywhere but at me.

He didn’t seem to want to talk at all.

For a moment, the hope I’d held all evening sank into disappointment. Maybe we weren’t as okay as he’d made it seem, but after a minute, I realized that his gaze kept flying to Melissa.

Maybe he was just preoccupied with that situation.

Maybe they had been fighting about it.

They didn't usually argue. As far as I'd ever seen, their six-year long relationship was the most easy-going, drama-less relationship ever. They didn't disagree much. They supported each other. They were nice to each other. But cheating would definitely throw a rock onto the calm waters for anyone.

When he continued to ignore me, I pushed to my feet and went over to Melissa and Deb.

I dropped an arm around Melissa's shoulders—mostly because I was a nosy bitch sometimes, especially where Kamran was concerned. And maybe especially because I knew he was watching.

“Hi Lissa, Deb. It's been a while.”

“Hi.”

“Hey Ryan,” Melissa said, turning to give me a half hug. “How are you, love?”

“Good, good,” I said. “Not much to report. You?”

“Work's been hell,” she said. “My boss has been riding me.”

I raised a brow at her choice of words, wondering if she was giving herself a little inside joke that wasn’t as exclusive as she thought it was.

“I’ll bet,” I muttered.

She launched into work talk, explaining all the things she'd had to do lately for their clients and her manager. Deb chimed in too with related things she was dealing with at the bakery.

They were both one glass of wine too engrossed in the boring details of office and shop life. Melissa seemed to be in a great mood, completely oblivious to the daggers currently being glared in her general direction.

When I glanced over, Kamran was sulking while he watched us. My heart twinged for him. Normally he would just come over and join in but things really were different… I didn’t know how to feel about it.

Finally, I managed to find a moment to back out of the conversation and went to the fridge to collect two more beers before taking them back to the living room where Kamran was still sitting in the armchair, watching everyone.

He had a bit of a cynical sense of humour to begin with, but the man wasn't usually a downer. It was out of character.

So, I handed him a beer and sat across from him, tapping my can to his.

“You okay man?” I asked, quietly enough that I hoped that the girls didn't hear me.

His gaze focused on me sharply and to my surprise, a small, soft smile touched his full lips.

“You always notice everything,” he said softly.

I didn't have the heart to tell him that it was kind of hard to miss. He was easy to read... then again, the others still seemed oblivious, so maybe it was just the type of connection that we had.

He tipped back his beer and shrugged.

“I'm not sure what to say,” he admitted quietly and left it at that.

With so many people around, I decided not to press it, but there was something in his gaze that gave me my answer.

Kamran wasn't okay. Whatever was happening between him and Melissa was far from over. I couldn’t imagine the kind of stress that would cause. I’d never been in a relationship long enough for that and never with someone that I really wanted to be with.

For the rest of the night, Kamran’s mood was like an ache inside me, an itch that I was desperate to scratch but couldn't reach because it was so deep.

I wanted to fix things for him.

I feltcompelledto make him happy.I only wished that there was something I could do to help.