Page 13 of Unfaithfully Yours

TEN

Ryan

“Here's my form, for the away game, Coach.”

“Thanks bud,” I said, taking the offered sheet from one of my young players.

We were having a group trip a couple hours north in a few weeks after qualifying for the semi-finals and everyone was excited. For young teens, staying in a hotel with a bunch of your friends overnight was a huge deal, even if there would be parents there to chaperone.

And just as I thought of it, Michael's dad Carl approached me from the parking lot with a sheet in hand.

He came to watch almost every one of our team practices, so I assumed that he was planning on joining us before he even stopped in front of me, offering the form.

“Hey man, I'll be joining as a chaperone.”

“Nice,” I said, clapping his hand in response.

“How were the boys today?” he asked.

“Good as usual,” I answered. “Michael was in top form.”

He grunted in response.

“Would have liked to come watch but had to work late.”

“Yeah? Where do you work?” I asked curiously.

“At the Orson Metal Works Factory,” he said and just the mention of Kamran's workplace made my heart seize up.

“You're kidding,” I said.

It shouldn't have been a big surprise. A lot of people in town worked in the factories. The city was packed with them, but it still felt like God was giving me a big poke in the side, just to punish me for the stupid shit that I'd done with a married man.

“Been working there for fifteen years,” he said and that piqued my interest even more.

“You look a bit young for that,” I said, looking him over. Then again, he had a fourteen your old son, so maybe he was older than he looked.

He gave me a small smile.

“I am,” he said simply. “Had Michael young. Needed to step up early, be a good dad. All that.”

I nodded, looking him over again because I couldn't help myself this time.

He was a nice guy, maybe a bit gruff, but he was always around to support his son. Something about him reminded me of Kamran, even though they looked nothing alike. Maybe it was just the rare green eyes. Whatever it was, looking at him made me kind of sad. It was too much of a reminder.

“Right, well, it'll be good to have you there,” I said.

I patted his shoulder, ready to head out once all the kids were gone.

My eyes went out to the parking lot where most of them were already being picked up, and I froze as my gaze zeroed in on an all too familiar man.

Kamran was leaning against the side of his car, arms crossed, watching me from a distance.

“Fuck,” I muttered.

“What's wrong?” Carl asked, at my side.

I glanced at him, remembering that he was still there.

“Nothing. Excuse me.”

My feet carried me away—toward Kamran. Halfway there I stopped, because surely small talk with one of the parents was better than facing whatever the hell Kamran wanted now.

The last time he'd shown up unexpectedly I'd done something I really shouldn't have done, and it had ended with Kamran running.

I'd thought our friendship was over. That I wouldn't be seeing him again, and yet there he was.

It was kind of like seeing a ghost. I didn't know what to expect.

Was it friendly or there to terrorize my ass?

I forced myself to keep moving, letting my feet carry me all the way to where Kamran was still standing, watching me.

His sea foam green eyes were fixed on me but were completely unreadable. I had no clue what he was thinking, and it made my body buzz with nerves.

To stop the shaking of my hands, I copied his stance, crossing my arms over my chest and leaning against his car, leaving a couple feet between us.

“Thought we should talk,” he said.

“Is that really necessary?” I forced, unable to meet his gaze. “I think you made everything pretty clear the other day.”

Then, because the sudden thought that maybe it wasn't too late, maybe we could fix everything between us wouldn't leave me alone, I kept talking.

“We can just forget about everything. That's probably for the best. Start fresh or whatever. I don't mind. Or if you need space, I get that too. I don't want you to think things have to be weird. Just?—”

“Ryan,” he said, interrupting my rambling.

He waited until I glanced up, forcing myself to meet his amused gaze.

“Just get in my car so we can talk in private.”

I swallowed, pushed off the side and walked around to the passenger seat, climbing inside, and waiting, heart racing while he got in and settled with a big sigh.

“Look,” he said. “I have a lot to apologize for.”

I shut my eyes.

“I really don't want to hear it. It's fine?—”

“No. It's not. I shouldn't have run off like that.”

He was sorry for running off? I bit my lip to stop myself from saying, Good. You should be .

My fingers picked at my jeans, searching for loose threads. Anything for a distraction. Part of me wanted to hide my head, but the rest of me was too curious about what else he had to say.

“I get it,” I managed, encouraging him to go on.

His hand suddenly landed on mine, stopping the unnecessary picking and making my gaze fly up to fix on his once more.

“Kamran...”

It was his turn to look nervous this time. He licked his full lips, his gaze flickering down to mine and my stomach knotted.

“I've been thinking about how I went toyou, over and over, whenever I needed to tell someone about what was happening.”

“Of course,” I whispered. “Because I'm your friend, Kamran. I'd do anything for you.”

My words, spoken too honestly, held far more meaning than I'd meant to share. I could tell by Kamran's expression that he got it too.

So much for taking things back to the start. Instead, I'd practically confessed my undying feelings. After years of keeping it all to myself, why was it all pouring out now?

“That's why I wanted to come see you and work this all out,” he said quietly, squeezing my hand. “Because I know how much you care and I want you to know that, well, it goes both ways.”

I knew he didn't mean that the way that it sounded. He couldn't. But God, hearing it was glorious.

“I know Kamran,” I said, squeezing his hand back. “You're a great friend. Always have been. Let's just start over, yeah?”

He stared at me for a moment and then chuckled softly.

“Ryan,” he said slowly, sending shivers over my skin. “I don't want to go back to how things were. I feel like I was sleeping for years, and your kiss finally woke me up.”

I stared.

“But you ran ,” I reminded him, voice shaking. “I didn't think I would even see you again. I thought I broke you.”

“You did,” he agreed. “In the best way.”

He leaned toward me, but I leaned back, unable to process what he was saying.

“No,” I said, shaking my head. “I'm sorry, but no. ”

I yanked my hand from his grasp, panic and frustration and the knowledge that I was going to get hurt again making me want to get the fuck out of this car right now and run.

“I made you cry , Kamran. By sucking your dick... That's not the typical reaction to getting a blowjob,” I informed him.

He bit his lip, obviously trying to stop a smile that couldn't be contained and then gave up and laughed.

“It sounds bad when you say it like that,” he chuckled.

At my gaping, he ran a hand through his hair, messing it all up and making himself look even sexier, which was just not a fair move at all in this situation.

“It made me realize some things,” he finally said. “And it was a lot for me.”

I didn't say anything, waiting for more. He sighed, sagging in his seat.

“When you were doing... that , it made it hard to deny that me and Melissa... well we don't really have any chemistry,” he admitted, going red. “Whenever we’ve had sex it was never so...”

I could barely breathe in anticipation, but Kamran was looking down at his hands where they were clasped on his lap, clearly having difficulty finding words.

“What?” I prompted gently and he sighed, forcing his eyes up to my face, searching it.

“The other day—and every time you touched me—it felt like it meant something,” he admitted. “And I've never felt that before.”

My heart was pounding. I knew what he was saying. It was how I felt too. Like each time our skin brushed it was feeding my very soul .

But to hear Kamran saying he felt the same thing was surreal.

“But Melissa,” I found myself saying.

He grimaced.

“Yeah. Melissa....”

He shook his head, his gaze flying out to the field in the distance.

“I know we need to figure out all the hard stuff, but every time I try, we end up arguing or not talking at all.”

“The hard stuff?”

“Yeah, all the typical divorce stuff, you know. She doesn't even know that I know about her cheating yet. I guess I keep putting off the inevitable.”

Oh fuck. He really was going to be getting a divorce. And he came here for me .

My heart was running a fucking marathon as I tried to remain sitting calmly in my seat waiting for him to say all the things I'd been dreaming about for years now.

“I just want to make sure I'm not about to lose both my wife and my best friend,” he said.

“You won’t lose me,” I whispered.

“Okay,” he said carefully. “Because I've never felt like this about anyone before.”

Oh god. Now there was no way that I could contain the trembling.

I had to shake my head to be able to remember the last argument I had left. Probably the most important one.

“But you've never been into men before,” I said. “Have you?”

He shrugged.

“No,” he said, like that didn't even matter.”But I’m into one now.”

I stared at him because that statement was just so Kamran.

“Kam ,” I groaned. “It’s not that easy. There's other stuff to consider.”

“Like what?” he asked.

“Like, coming out?” I said, partially to scare him, because if there was any hesitancy over that aspect then I wanted to know now.

“You're not out,” he pointed out patiently.

“That's because,” I spluttered, realizing that my reason for remaining closeted was now claiming to be right in there with me, probably ready to push me out the door.

“We can tell anyone you want,” he said, sliding closer to me. “Or not hide it at all. Or keep it completely secret. I don't care. Your call. I just want to try this.”

I couldn't wrap my head around it, not even when his hand slid into the hair at the nape of my neck, not even when he steered me toward him with a firm grip. Not even when he kissed me.

My eyes fluttered shut and I leaned in, sighing against his lips, hand flying to the front of his shirt to grip it tightly so he couldn’t pull away.

When we parted slightly though, my mouth just kept running like it hadn't been interrupted by straight-up heaven.

“What do you mean you want to try this? What is this ?”

“You tell me,” he said, pressing his lips to mine again, briefly this time. Fucking tease. “What do you want from me, Ryan?”

I meant to say anything , but I whispered, “Everything,” and he moaned softly, kissing me again before responding.

“I was hoping you would say that.”

I had definitely fallen and hit my head at some point today—probably on the way to Kamran’s car. He'd probably showed up to tell me our friendship was done for good, and now, here I was, in a coma, imagining the complete opposite. I was going to be so pissed when the doctors resuscitated me.

His tongue delved into my mouth and a throaty moan tore from his throat and oh wow , this was real. He wanted me. Not just for a night. Not just to give him a bit of relief, or a break from reality. But for more. For something permanent.

“I can’t believe you’re making plans to come out with me,” I whispered.

“Yes, but baby steps,” he returned, gasping as I bit his lip. “At least let me suck your dick first.”

Any bit of blood that remained in my brain, promptly went down south leaving me staring at him blankly, unable to process anything aside from my raging boner.

“My place,” I managed to say. “Drive.”

“Your car,” he reminded me, hands on my jaw, stroking my cheeks and tangling in my hair. He was flushed pink and looked so good that I moaned, unable to believe I could have this and pressed forward, tangling my hands in the back of his shirt to pull him tight against my chest.

The second our lips met again, hot and desperate, a car honked too close. We both jumped apart and looked out the windows.

It seemed that the car next to us had almost pulled out while another one was passing. It was nothing to do with us, but it was the reminder that I needed that we were still on school property and many of my students and coworkers were still around. Oops.

“Right. All glass walls,” I said. “Probably shouldn't be doing this here.”

Kamran snorted. He turned the key in the ignition and pulled out, but his gaze lingered on me in a way that made my toes curl with anticipation. How could it be so clear with one look that he couldn't wait to get me naked?

“Drive fast,” I told him, and he grinned.

“I'm planning to run every red light.”