Page 4 of The Secret Love of a Gentleman (The Marlow Family Secrets #3)

Rob was torn. Should he follow her? He had not said anything wrong and yet guilt gripped in his chest because she had been sitting with the family and he had scared her off.

He cursed himself as she ascended the flight of stairs to the terrace and disappeared into the house, a phantom again.

He would apologise during dinner this evening.

When the dinner hour came, there was no opportunity before the meal as she clung to Mary’s side.

Then, at the table, Kate had pandered to Caroline’s insecurities and seated her in between his mother and Mary.

Everyone else sat in the order of male then female, then male and so on.

But between the women Caroline was clearly more comfortable, more animated.

She held a long conversation with Mary, smiling on occasions and gesturing as she spoke.

She was beautiful, not in the striking way of his sister.

There was no particularly notable element in her features, her hair was a mixture of brown and blonde, her eyes hazel, her nose straight, her lips perhaps too broad – but the elements put together…

And, when her lips parted in a rare smile, and her expression lit up her fa ce, it was as though it awakened her beauty.

It was fascinating watching her when she did not realise she was being watched, because he saw someone he doubted anyone but Drew and Mary knew.

He was so entranced, he hardly spoke to his Aunt Jane and his cousin Eleanor, who flanked him at the table.

He felt as though he were watching a rare wild creature, sitting in silence because if he moved or spoke, she would discover him watching and run.

The candlelight from the candelabras along the table made her pale skin glow.

There was one small dark mole above her top lip, to the right, and a sprinkle of pale freckles across the bridge of her nose, where at some point in her life she had not been careful of the sun.

Her head turned and her gaze caught on his, for an instant. A heartbeat. Before she looked at his mother and carried on talking.

In that instant emotion struck him hard in the chest, it felt as though he had been knocked flat by a punch. He shook his head, clearing his thoughts.

Katherine stood, and smiled, her gaze passing across the women. ‘Ladies. I believe it is time we left the men to their port.’ The other women about the table rose and they filed from the room.

Rob changed chairs, moving along to sit beside Uncle Richard. They did not take long over their port; the men in his family rarely stayed at the table for long, they preferred to spend their time with their wives.

When he walked into the drawing room, at the back of the men, Rob’s gaze searched for Caroline.

She was sitting in her corner. Harry had jokingly labelled the chair she always sat in here ‘ Caroline’s corner ’ years ago, when one of their sisters had been about to take the seat. ‘ You’ll get kicked out, that’s Caroline’s corner… ’ The chair had been Caroline’s corner ever since .

Kate was sitting in the chair beside Caroline’s, talking with her, or perhaps to her.

It was laughable really how his whole family manoeuvred around Caroline’s idiosyncrasies.

‘Robbie.’ Rob turned at the sound of John’s voice. ‘I imagine you are longing to stretch your wings. I know I was excited to escape education at your age.’

‘You did not just stretch your wings, you flew off.’

As a child, Rob had aspired to be like his half-brother until he realised John was so damned perfect there was no matching him.

John just irked him now. They were not particularly close.

In Rob’s formative years John had been away at school and when John left education he travelled abroad for years.

He returned when their maternal grandfather died, because he inherited the Duke’s title.

‘Yes, well, this country held no appeal when Grandfather was alive. You could travel if you chose to, Rob. Your allowance is yours to do with as you will.’

The words kicked Rob in the gut. Living on John’s generosity was not the life he wanted. ‘I have not decided what I will do.’ That was not true, but he would not share his political aspirations with John because John would take control of them.

‘Except escape Mama’s nest.’

‘Well, yes, that, obviously.’ Rob’s gaze swung away, to discover Caroline watching him. His heartbeat thumped in his chest. She looked away quickly.

‘Will you run riot in town, then?’

Rob’s attention focused back on John.

‘That is Harry’s style not mine. Harry is the black sheep.’

John held Rob’s shoulder. ‘Well, whatever you do, do not become a stranger.’

Rob nodded, and John turned to speak with someone else .

Katherine had moved from the chair beside Caroline, leaving Caroline sat looking at her hands as they rested in her lap, seemingly trying to hide amid the crowd. A phantom again. He was in no doubt that if she were at Drew’s home, she would have left the room by now.

He walked over. ‘Caroline,’ he acknowledged her.

The muscles in her upper body jerked, and her gaze flew up to him. She had not noticed his approach.

Her hair was curled and coifed, with a few short curls carefully positioned to kiss her cheeks, framing her face. The ringlets trained to trail the length of her slender neck had danced with her movement.

She was a slight woman, small, and slender, shorter than average; yet she had an unusually generous bosom.

He sat in the seat beside her, twisting to face her.

She leaned back, appearing to move away from him.

‘I am sorry I upset you this afternoon, but there was no need to run.’

She stared at her hands.

‘Would you look at me?’ Rob urged quietly, sitting further forward in the chair. No one ever challenged her. Everyone protected her. But if she would not challenge herself…

The memory of his youngest sister, Jemima’s, aversion to spiders came to mind. He had caught one and kept it in a glass, so she could look at it, and he had eventually persuaded her to touch it. Now she would let one run across her hand. Fears ought to be faced.

Her head lifted and her eyes stared at him. The candlelight picked out certain flecks of colour in her eyes that turned the hazel to molten gold.

‘I am staying with Drew and Mary for the summer…’ He searched for the right words .

‘I know that, Mr Marlow,’ she answered, then her eyes looked beyond him.

He imagined she was looking for someone to rescue her.

‘Please, call me Rob not Mr Marlow. Look at me, please,’ he said again. If she could feel comfortable talking to him, then maybe he could break her fear – if he made himself the spider in a glass.

She did look at him, but her gaze raged with anger, her eyes narrowing and her lips pressing together, holding in words he imagined she would like to shout. Her expression said, leave me alone .

‘Why do you not feel comfortable?’ he asked.

She moved – about to rise and run again. Instinctively he reached out and held her wrist. ‘Caroline…’

He instantly regretted the action. Only Drew, Mary and the children touched her. Everyone knew she could not abide touch.

It was as though a lightning bolt struck them, her body jolted, and her expression accused him of committing murder. He removed his hand. She stood and fled to the safety of Mary.

Rob felt a heel for trying to persuade her to accept him. He waited for the glance of condemnation from Mary that would confirm it. None came. Caroline must not have told Mary about his faux pas. At least no one else had noticed.

He rested his elbow on the arm of the chair and his chin on his fist, and watched Caroline, wondering…

‘You are miles away, where are you?’ Rob’s Uncle Robert, the Earl of Barrington, occupied the chair Caroline had vacated.

Rob leaned back, and his ankle lifted to rest on his opposite knee as he smiled. Uncle Robert was his favourite uncle, his father’s brother. Rob was named after him.

‘I did not know you were coming,’ Rob said. ‘I thought you were returning to Yorkshire. ’

‘Jane wanted to spend some time with your mother and father before we go home. I gave in to her coercion.’

Aunt Jane was sitting at the pianoforte, in the company of Rob’s cousin, Margaret, sorting through music.

Rob was close to Uncle Robert because he and Harry had stayed with their uncle often in their childhood. Rob had been good friends with his cousin Henry then. Henry was his uncle’s eldest son, and his heir.

Henry was like Harry now. They were still close friends, and currently standing to one side of the room drinking wine and laughing about something.

‘Have you decided what you will do?’

‘No, beyond finding rooms in London during the summer.’ Again, he did not mention the House of Commons, he did not trust anyone to leave him alone to earn himself a seat.

‘The tenants are due to leave the estate which used to belong to Jane’s father. If you would be interested in renting that property, I would be happy for you to take it over and cut your teeth managing the farm.’

His father had managed all of Uncle Robert’s estates. Rob had a different plan for his life. It did not include following in his father’s footsteps and being dependent on his family. ‘No, thank you.’

‘It is only an offer, Robbie… not an insult.’

He had answered too bluntly and sounded rude. ‘Thank you, I am grateful for the offer.’

His gaze travelled to where Caroline stood. Again, she was watching him. She looked away.

An odd cramp-like pain clasped in his stomach, gripping at his solar plexus.

‘If you change your mind, write and let me know. I will probably not re-let it for a few months; there is some work to be done on the house.’

Rob looked at his uncle. ‘Will Henry not want it in a couple of years?’

‘Henry will have plenty to occupy him on my other estates and Henry is not you. My son is reckless and self-absorbed. He will not settle to anything that requires sobriety or forethought, at least not for several years. All he is currently interested in is racing his horses.’

‘Racing is Henry’s weakness,’ Rob stated. Women were Harry’s.

‘What is your weakness?’ His uncle lifted an eyebrow.

Rob’s family believed he had none. Harry constantly teased Rob about his spotless, or rather his boring, reputation. Rob had been too busy hauling Harry out of scrapes to get into any of his own. It was true he had no vice, but he did not think himself dull.

He drank excessively once, then woke up with no memory of the night before and hated not knowing what he had said or done. He had not drunk that much again. He had gambled at a card table once and lost half his allowance. That had taught him that gambling was a fool’s game.

Perhaps his weakness was idealism. He thought everyone should live by correct morals. But in truth, right now… ‘A lack of inspiration,’ he said, his expression mocking himself.

He had this great plan, but really it was no plan at all, it was a fanciful wish, he did not have a method by which to achieve it.

‘Something will come along to give you purpose. Wait and see.’ His uncle smiled.

‘We are going to dance, will you dance with me, Papa?’ Uncle Robert’s eldest daughter joined them. Julie was fifteen. She smiled at Rob.

‘Julie.’ Rob bowed his head in greeting .

‘Robbie.’ She smiled brightly and bobbed a shallow curtsy. It was unnecessary but she was practising for her debut next year.

Uncle Robert stood. ‘I shall be honoured, young lady.’

Beyond them, Rob caught Caroline looking again. He smiled. Pink patches stained her cheeks before she had a chance to look away.

Rob stood. It would be crass of him not to partner one of his sisters or female cousins in the dancing.

They danced a string of country dances, and the only person who sat out for every one of them was Caroline, yet she watched the dancing intently.

If he were courageous, he would offer to partner her, but she never danced.

Did she want to feel able to dance? Perhaps her fears were trapping her and this way of living was not really her choice.

Idealism was certainly his fault, because in his mind’s eye he saw her dancing, talking, laughing and smiling. She had come to life when she spoke with Mary at the table. How much more would she come to life if she danced without fear?

I shall dance with her by the end of the summer. The promise whispered through his thoughts. He abhorred dares, dares were another thing that were Harry’s forte. But determination was Rob’s forte, if he wanted to achieve something and he set his mind to it, he always achieved it.

He must apply that belief to his ability to win a seat in the House of Commons – he must set his mind to it and be determined to achieve it – the plan would follow.