Page 4 of The Handyman and The Drama Queen (Myths, Legends, and Southern Charm #1)

Ezra

He was back.

He was back?

Why was he back?

Did he really need the job that badly?

Oh. He was back.

Had he asked someone about…well…the problem?

Just thinking about the problem had my anxiety spiking again, and if I was still alive, I’d have said my chest was getting tight.

But I wasn’t alive, so it couldn’t be a panic attack or an issue with my heart.

Right?

Being dead was so much more complicated than I’d expected.

He’d parked the truck.

He’d actually come back.

How poor did someone need to be before they worked with ghosts just to put food on the table?

“Hey, Ezra, I figured out your name.” He was laughing and shaking his head as he came up to the porch. “I can’t believe I got so distracted yesterday I forgot to ask that.”

Oh.

Poking my head through the wall and trying not to look like I’d been hiding by the window, I shrugged. “Well, um, we were both kind of distracted yesterday.”

Had I asked his name?

I tried to be subtle and see if it was on his truck but it was parked wrong from where I was standing. My handyman’s laughter said he knew what I’d been trying to do. “Well, at least it wasn’t just me. My name is Stone.”

With most people I’d have assumed they had hippy parents of some sort, because there always seemed to be a small pocket of them somewhere, but he looked solid and strong and the name just fit him. “Nice to meet you, Stone.”

His grin widened again. “Nice to meet you, Ezra.”

He had the better name, but for some reason, coming out of his mouth, mine didn’t sound nearly as geeky as it usually did.

Deciding deep voices just made everything better, I tried not to squirm or look stupid as I went outside all the way. “Thank you for leaving the TV on all night. It made a world of difference.”

The house had been so empty and lonely before, I’d started going crazy.

Stone’s smile softened and he looked like he got how hard it’d been. “I’m glad. We’re going to try out a few more things to make stuff easier for you, though. The other ghost I went to talk to last night was helpful and not as stuffy as he was when I was a kid. I think hearing about you softened him up a bit because I was expecting a grilling about what the last book I’d read was.”

Huh?

“That one seems harmless, so I’m going to ask. The last book you read?” He was weird but I was starting to think at least half of it was because he always started in the middle of a story.

“Oh.” Cocking his head, he shrugged. “Sorry. The gentleman I spoke with has managed the library for…well, forever to me, and probably at least a hundred years, so he usually asks what you’ve been reading because it makes most people squirm.”

It seemed like the dead could be dicks too.

Stone didn’t need me to point that out based on his frown, but he didn’t let it distract him either. “Did you know most Americans don’t read anything after they get out of high school? I’d planned on telling him that I’d read the news, but I mostly just listen to that. So you saved me. Thanks.”

“You’re welcome?” The conversation was a bit hard to follow, but I was pretty sure I got the important parts. “I’m glad he didn’t fuck with you.”

“Me too.” Looking adorably sheepish, he shrugged again. “He always made me nervous as a kid, very put together in this old-fashioned suit as he glared at you. So I’m glad it wasn’t as stressful as it could’ve been.”

Ignoring what it did to me that he’d gone to talk to someone who made him worry just to help me, I did my best to keep still and not blush. There was no way I could explain my reaction without sounding nuts. “Thank you for going, though. I appreciate any answers he could give.”

And being old-fashioned meant he’d keep his gossip to himself, right?

“He’s…he’s got those old-fashioned manners? Tight-lipped and not too chatty?” There was no way to casually ask if the guy would keep his mouth shut, and my roundabout questions had Stone smirking. “I’m trying to ask without actually asking so it’s not weird.”

Stone laughed.

I blushed.

And we were right where I’d been trying to avoid.

“It’s okay that you want to know how to jerk off to thoughts of me. It’s perfectly understandable.” Stone either thought a lot of himself or just liked fucking with me. But before I could decide, he came up the steps and stopped right in front of me. “Do you want me to tell you what I learned, sexy?”

Oh wow.

Okay, I was dead but clearly not that dead.

I managed to nod but words weren’t cooperating.

“If you’re a good boy for me, we should be able to get that hard-on from simmering to exploding.” His teasing description finally made me realize I’d actually started to get erect. “Are you going to let me watch you come, sexy boy, or am I just going to be able to listen?”

Were those my only options?

“I…” Limits. He’d said limits were important and every idiot on the internet knew what that meant. “I don’t know what my limits are yet.”

Instead of telling me I was being ridiculous or moving away, his wicked smirk shifted into a softer smile. “Thank you for telling me. You’re a very good boy and I can’t wait to help you figure out your limits.”

Was figuring those out supposed to sound that erotic?

“Can you tell me what you’re thinking, Ezra?” Stone was still impossibly close. His arms twitched and it looked like he was imagining touching me. “If you can’t or don’t want to, that’s fine, but I’d really like to know what’s going through your head.”

Doubting that completely, I wanted to tell him that he was being ridiculous and to stop fucking with me, but the words wouldn’t come out. He seemed like he was going to settle in and wait for eternity until I said something, so I just kept trying until I could get a response out. “Are you sure?”

Okay, that hadn’t been helpful or even remotely sexy, but Stone didn’t seem to mind. He simply nodded and stayed where he was. “Yes. I will always want to know what you’re thinking no matter what happens between us.”

I was dead.

Nothing could happen between us.

Fuck it.

“Um, I…” God, I was going to sound pathetic. “I was wondering if the…if you talking about helping me test my limits was supposed to be erotic.”

Could someone be killed twice?

If the second one was embarrassment based, would that make a difference?

“Yes.” Somehow looking like the whole conversation was perfectly normal, Stone nodded with an air of confidence that made it all even sexier. “I was hoping that it would be erotic and not scary for you. But if it gets overwhelming or if I misread the situation, we’re going to have a way to pause what we’re doing and take a step back. I want us to stay on the sexy side of nervous and not cross into the bad side. Make sense?”

“Safewords.” The word popped out before I could catch it. “You’re talking about safewords.”

I wasn’t a complete moron and I was glad for that when he nodded. “Yes, good job. Right now, we’re going to use stoplight colors because I think you’ll understand how to use those easiest. Red means?”

“Stop.” Everyone knew that, right? It wasn’t just because my internet search history had been slightly questionable in the months leading up to my SpaghettiOs disaster?

I’d been lonely and moving out to the middle of fucking Louisiana hadn’t helped the situation. Why I’d thought it would was beyond me, but it excused my slightly random knowledge about safewords and weird shit.

Even if I hadn’t done anything like that before, it was perfectly acceptable to have questions…and just figuring out the answers to them didn’t make me too strange. Information was important and I hadn’t wanted to look stupid if something had come up.

“Good boy.” Stone’s hand rose and he barely caught himself before his hand tried to touch my face.

I thought it would’ve derailed the conversation completely but he didn’t think it was creepy or strange. “And yellow?”

“Pause. That…that slows things down.” It was logical but I’d also stumbled across some interesting porn a few times.

Just a handful.

But again, that was okay because it was fine to be curious…and I couldn’t be held responsible for the weird shit online.

“That’s right.” Looking pleased, either with my answer or that I wasn’t a complete moron, he smiled wider. “And green?”

“That…that I’m good and we…we can keep going.” Because it was supposed to be easier to say than yes, but I’d never actually explored anything like that, so it was all theoretical to me.

“Perfect.” Stone looked like he meant that as something hot and sexy flashed across his face. “But for the time being, moving away from me will be a physical sign that you need a break. Do you want to be able to tell me no and have that actually mean no?”

Ugh.

“I…I’m not sure that’s a good idea.” I might actually say no and not mean it. He was scrambling my brain and I wasn’t sure how I’d respond. “Stuff just pops out and…and I think the colors will be clearer.”

At the very least they’d feel more innocent, like we were playing a weird game of Red Light Green Light from back when I was a kid.

“I’m glad you realize that.” Somehow looking proud of me for what felt like an obvious decision, Stone’s smile went sexy again. “And thank you for explaining that sometimes your first response is one you haven’t thought through. I’ll keep that in mind and ask clarifying questions if there’s conflict between what your body is expressing and what your words are saying.”

Weirdest first date ever.

Or first something.

Hmm…were we counting our walk as our first something?

“I don’t know what to say to that but it’s mostly because I’ve never been in a situation like this before and I don’t know what’s reasonable or polite.” I was quickly shifting toward feeling stupid again, but Stone’s smile said he’d liked something about what I’d said.

“Good job, sexy boy. I’m very proud of you for admitting that quickly.” His hands shifted again and he frowned down at one. “Okay, let’s try something here because I’m much more touch motivated than I realized. I want you to close your eyes and imagine your live body as clearly as you can. Feel the breeze on your face. How heavy it is. Imagine how the wood of the porch feels under your skin.”

Still wasn’t getting any less weird…but I did it because one of the only other things I knew about BDSM was that Doms liked being obeyed.

And I was definitely not the leader in our current situation.

“Good boy.” Stone’s tone was pleased and his voice got deeper as I followed his instructions. “Just do your best and try for me. This is all about how clear the image in your head is and how much you think it’s real.”

Clear image.

Good imagination.

Got it.

Clear image of having a body again.

Picture it as detailed as I can.

The sun would be warm but it wasn’t too hot yet, and the weatherman had said there would be a breeze. I’d feel that on my skin but I wouldn’t be cold. The wood would be rough because I hadn’t gotten around to refinishing it yet.

Oh.

“I was going to refinish the floors out here. They’re rough and I kept getting splinters in my feet. That needs to go on your list.” How had I forgotten that? “If I had a body again, something would probably be stabbing my toes and I’d be complaining about it.”

That’d happened so many times I could almost feel it.

Stone chuckled. “That’s a very good point. I hadn’t noticed the wood here because something was very distracting yesterday.”

I managed not to roll my eyes but only because they were closed.

“You were just walking up and could actually see me. I wasn’t expecting that and just reacted.” It was perfectly understandable under the circumstances.

“I’m not sure if this is the right time or not to confess that I was imagining putting you over my lap and giving you a reminder that manners are very important.” His chuckle said he knew I was bouncing between embarrassment and feeling very confused.

Why had my body picked this point to show me it could work appropriately?

“But you’re much sweeter today and I loved how excited you were to see me.” His chuckle and just the way he was teasing me was so distracting, I almost ignored the feeling of something brushing against my cheek. “You were peeking out the window and thought you were being so subtle.”

He was such a brat.

There it was again.

“I…” If I was imagining it, I didn’t want to open my eyes and see him standing across the porch. “I was afraid you wouldn’t come back. Part of me thought yesterday was some kind of hallucination.”

And another part of me kept insisting I was dead, so my brain couldn’t work like that any longer.

“I wasn’t a figment of your imagination and I keep my promises. Sometimes problems will come up, but I will always do my best to show up when I say I will.” He made a soft sound as I felt something tingly on my face again. “Even if we’re arguing and you’re pissed at me, I’ll come out here and sit on the porch, probably fuming or doing my best to make you even more pissed if I’m not thinking right.”

I couldn’t help laughing at that image. “You’d pout. I can already see it. You’re the pouting type.”

Stone huffed but didn’t tell me I was wrong. “I’m going to have fun riling you up.”

“I thought…I thought Doms were supposed to be serious and calm. That’s what they do in porn.” Hmm, probably shouldn’t have admitted to seeing that.

Chuckling softly, Stone didn’t fuck with me about the porn I’d watched, though. “They come in all types. Some brattier than others.”

Great.

Death by stupidity was probably written on my headstone and the Dom I’d finally found was the brat variety.