Page 41 of The Casualty of Us (Philosophies of the Heart Duet #1)
His eyes drop to my lips, staying there as lightning flickers through the room like whatever god he believes in is on my side, and it’s barely a split second later that the hazel is rising back up with that intensity blazing in it.
“Fuck it.”
The hand hovering in the air reaches past my head, and it only takes one more heartbeat for his lips to find mine, everything in me stilling as the contact steals whatever remaining sanity I have.
Oh, fuck.
My eyes fall shut at that first brush of his lips against mine, feathering over the top with a barely there touch before he pulls at the bottom one gently.
Pressing his body against mine and rolling me back to settle us together as his other hand slides against my cheek.
His thumb brushes back and forth in time with the second little pull of my bottom lip right before his tongue slides against the seam of my lips and I gasp.
My body finally shocked back into playing catch-up and granting him entry with that cedar scent suddenly everywhere.
Another gasp catches in my throat when his tongue meets mine, and I lift a hand to his shoulder, needing something to hold on to.
Every little place his skin is touching mine suddenly buzzes with life, leaving me shaking as I reach for his hair with my other hand.
Giving in with a sigh as my fingers wind through the black silk there and sliding my tongue back against his finally.
Tossing myself eagerly into the abyss as everything that’s been missing falls into place like we’re our own form of mathematical perfection.
A golden ratio I’ve never been curious enough to explore until now.
A soft groan passes from his lips to mine, and he bites down on my lower lip, making me tug on his hair and loving when he makes the sound again.
Relief washing over me that he’s right there with me.
As powerless to this as I am.
I drop my hand from his shoulder to the bottom of his shirt, grabbing for it blindly and feeling his abs twitch against my fingers when I make contact with the skin there.
His fingers drop down to my jaw, and he tilts my head, immediately deepening the kiss as my fingers run up his side.
Only knowing that I need more of this because everything about it feels right with him.
Every breath that passes between us. Every brush of our lips. The way his skin feels hot against mine and the way he groans when I pull on his hair.
The way I can feel some part of me finally giving.
Letting that wall crack as some part of him that science can’t name yet tries to wrap itself around me.
Digging deep as our atoms vibrate against each other like they’re desperately trying to break through the skin.
How the taste of something woodsy and vanilla that I’m never going to be able to get out of my head is filling my mouth.
How the pull of something low and warm is pushing me to never stop doing exactly this with him.
I need all of it.
And that’s exactly why I end it, scratching my nails lightly down his back, feeling goose bumps erupt over his skin and kissing him back deeply for one more breath before pulling back.
Knowing that if I stay wrapped up in him for one more second, there’ll be no turning back. No take-backs from there.
He drags my lower lip through his teeth again, gently releasing it and leaving me chasing after him for a split second before he teases me with another barely there kiss. His eyes crack just as mine do, and the hazel and blue drown in each other as we both gasp for the same air.
My mind suddenly firing again with an instinctual knowing. One that resounds so loudly through my head that I’m surprised he can’t hear it.
No take-backs from here either. Regardless of what I said.
We’re in it now, whatever it is.
But I’ve known that since the day in the closet, haven’t I? That there was never going to be any going back when it came to him.
It’s why I’m committing fraud for him, I guess.
His thumb runs over the line of my jaw slowly, eyes moving between mine with his voice coming out hushed and gravelly. “What does this mean, O?”
And even though it makes my still racing heart clench up, I lie.
“Nothing.” Running my fingers over his back quickly, I pull him a little closer to lessen the blow I can’t help. “Just go to sleep, Dimples.”
Because I can’t just give in either…I just can’t .
Not without having time to work it out myself.
“You sure about that?” His eyes narrow on mine, and I hold my breath, probably giving myself away but too edgy right now to care. “Cause that’s the first time you’ve called me Dimples since you told me to drop dead.”
I purse my lips, seeing the determination written all over him now but still forcing out a “Yeah,” holding his gaze even as it narrows further, and adding. “I’m sure.”
Lie. Lie. Lie.
My brain practically malfunctions with the force of its denial, and his gaze runs over my face, pausing on my lips before coming back up to mine with a quiet, “If that’s the way you want it.
” He rolls off me with a harsh exhale, immediately sliding his arm under my head and pulling me up against his chest with the other. “At least for now.”
I scowl at that, ordering him quickly, “Go to sleep.”
A quiet puff of laughter fills the air, and he tucks me in right up against him, reaching down to grab my hand that’s still lying against his abs. “I’m not sure I’ll ever sleep again now.”
He winds our fingers together, tapping away at the back of my hand, and a tease rises to my lips despite the fact I know I’m running out of cop-outs to what’s starting to feel inevitable here. “Now you know what it’s like in my head.”
“Hmm.” He hums under his breath, the note drawing out happily before his hand squeezes mine, and I feel a kiss being pressed to the top of my head. “Sleep, Freckles, I’ve got you.”
I close my eyes, leaving the rest for later, and let myself sink into him to find exhaustion pulling at me that was missing before. Still, I can’t help but whisper, “Thanks, Dimples.”
Part of me knows I’m not being fair, and the other half argues I haven’t been fair enough as sleep starts to claim me with his voice filling the air again. “Every better part of me is already because of you.”