Page 42 of Sweet Vengeance (Sins of the Father #2)

Ollie

Going to Boston is probably only happening because of what I said to Cillian, but now that we’re in the car and driving there, I’m nervous.

And worried I won’t be able to hide my anger at Cillian’s dad.

I’ll never understand how he abandoned his son after Cillian’s mom died, how he can fail Cillian over and over again.

How he can be so close physically to his son, yet emotionally so far away.

He doesn’t realize the gift he’s been given, and part of me doesn’t want him to have the chance to make amends, but that’s not what’s best for Cillian.

He struggles to admit it, but he wants a real relationship with his father, and I want him to have everything he needs.

The fact that Cillian doesn’t want me to even leave his side while we’re there doesn’t bode well for this being a normal family reunion.

If we’re going to make this work, though, I can’t not ever be around his family.

I’ll have to find that middle ground between not wanting to know about the things they do and still being involved in his world.

I shift in the passenger seat, and Cillian glances over. “You good?”

“Yes. What about you?”

He shrugs.

“I’m sorry. I hope I didn’t talk you into doing something you don’t want to do.”

“You didn’t. I would have gone because deep down I’m still that little fucking boy who wants his father’s attention, who wants to make him proud.”

My heart breaks for him, but I feel so honored it’s me in this car with him right now, that it’s me he shares these things with.

“Cut yourself some slack. You feel things. You love your family and want to be loved by them. We all want that.” I reach over and place my hand on his thigh.

Cillian grabs and lifts it, pressing his lips to my palm before putting it in place again.

We chat about school and everyday things for the rest of the drive.

Aislin and Rory are riding with Dean and Tiernan—I think they purposefully left Cillian and me alone because…

because in a strange way, Cillian needs me.

He’s said as much over and over, but words and actions are two different things.

I see it in times like this—me, the boy no one else ever really wanted.

The nerdy guy who cared more about school than a social life or friends.

The one who used to let Tiernan kick me out of my own dorm room and who got beat up because I couldn’t defend myself…

but I am who Cillian needs. I’m who he goes to.

No matter how much he loves those people in the other car, it’s me here with him, and that means something to me.

I will never, ever let him down. Just like I know he will never let me down.

I stare open-mouthed when we pull into a driveway with a locked gate in front of the house. Cillian rolls his window down and presses a code into the keypad before the black iron slides open.

“Holy crap. You didn’t tell me you lived in a mansion.”

He chuckles. “It’s not a mansion.”

“It looks like one to me. Jeez, Cillian. I hope you don’t expect anything close to this when you go home with me.”

“This doesn’t fucking matter. This is all show.

I don’t give a fuck about things like this.

I care about you. About them.” He nods toward Tiernan’s car.

“I care about how it feels to watch you laugh and talk with your father on the phone like he’s your best friend.

Those things matter more than a house ever will. ”

I know that, I do, but… “I mean, it’s kinda cool, though.”

Cillian chuckles. “Not gonna complain, that’s for sure.”

We smile at each other, neither getting out of the car. Honestly? I’m scared out of my mind, but I don’t want to be. “I’m a little freaked out,” I admit. There’s no reason to have lies between us.

“I know. Nothing will happen to you. They’re not going to hurt you.”

“Then why did you tell me to stay by your side the whole time?”

He shrugs. “Because I like you there.”

I roll my eyes, but how does a guy not swoon a little at that? “Will the others stay here too? Tiernan’s mom is close, right?”

“He’ll want to go see her. He typically stays there, but then, we usually all do. Rory will stay here for sure, but I have a feeling Tiernan and Dean will as well. I’m not sure about Ash.”

I nod, and Cillian leans in. He cups my face with a gentleness I know he only has with me and presses our lips together.

“We doing this?” he asks.

“We’re doing it.” I turn, open the door, and see a man standing on the porch.

He’s wearing slacks and a button-up shirt, like Cillian and Tiernan often do.

He has his hands in his pockets, brown hair like Cillian’s, only his is slicked back.

He’s tall and broad, looking both like a dignified businessman and, well, a stone-faced killer.

I immediately feel the air in the vehicle thicken, Cillian’s tension rolling off him in waves.

And maybe…maybe he also doesn’t want me to leave his side for himself, and not just for me.

“I’m not going anywhere,” I tell him.

“I know. Let’s get this over with.”

He gets out of the car, and I do the same. The others are waiting, letting Cillian lead the way because that’s what they do, isn’t it?

I take Cillian’s hand, proud to be a part of this, a part of them, even if it’s in my own way.

“How was the drive?” Rian asks, to no one specific. Not to his son, I notice, but I have a feeling he wants it to be directed at him.

“Same as always,” Tiernan answers. “Is this going to become a thing? Are we trying to pretend we’re a normal family now?”

“You act like we never spend holidays together. Regardless of…many things, we are a family.”

Cillian scoffs beside me.

Rian looks at him. “Do you have something to say?”

“Do you?” Cillian counters. When his father doesn’t speak, Cillian adds, “Figures. You can fuck off with your family bullshit.”

Cillian walks up the stairs, me beside him. Before we can pass, Rian’s arm shoots out, his hand wrapping around Cillian’s bicep. “Are you going to introduce me to your friend?”

“He’s not my friend. He’s mine. Nothing anyone says will change that.”

Wait. What? Change that? Is that a thing they would try to do?

“Agreed,” Tiernan adds from behind us.

“I think the two of you are mistaken about who’s in charge here. You chose to give up that role, Tiernan. You don’t get to play pretend now.”

I stiffen beside Cillian, my heart punching against my chest.

Rian turns his attention to us…and while Cillian has blue eyes, Rian’s are green like Tiernan’s.

“And do you agree? You’re not going anywhere?” he asks me.

“Fuck you. Don’t talk to him,” Cillian seethes.

“Can he not speak for himself?” Rian asks.

“I can, and no. I’m not going anywhere. No one can take me away from Cillian…

because he’s mine too.” I’m prouder than I’ve ever been that my voice doesn’t shake.

I won’t let him intimidate me, which I think he’s trying to do.

Maybe this is a game, some kind of test, and if it is, I damn sure plan to pass it.

If not, I’m still going to let him know that when it comes to Cillian, I will always choose him and I will always protect him.

I’m surprised when Rian gives me a small smile. “Well, then, if you’re my son’s and he’s yours, maybe we should at least be properly introduced. I’m Rian.” He holds his hand out for me.

I stare at it a moment, unsure what to do. Is it a betrayal to Cillian to shake it? I don’t think so, because my goal is to help build a bridge.

Cillian has ahold of my left hand, so I lift my right and clasp it with his. “Ollie.”

“The future lawyer from Michigan,” he says.

“Jesus, you fucking looked into him!” Cillian shouts.

“It’s my job to protect this family,” Rian answers simply.

“I don’t have anything to hide. Yes, that’s my goal. It’s always been my dream, but we’ll make it work. I would never betray Cillian or any of you.”

Rian watches me for a moment, the wheels clearly spinning in his head. I have no doubt he knows I’m afraid, that he can see it, smell it, but I do my best to stand my ground.

“Good. Now, should we do normal family shit or what?” Rian smirks.

I have no idea what to think of this man. In some ways, I hate him, but in others, I see there’s more to him than he wants to show. That he’s hurting and hiding in similar ways as his son.

“Normal family shit? Jesus, Uncle Rian, you’re an idiot.” Aislin works her way through us and gives him a hug.

“Be nice, brat.” He presses the tip of his finger to her nose in this loving way that he has yet to show his own son. Fear of rejection, maybe?

“Let’s go inside,” Aislin says, and we follow. She gives Cillian a small smile, then takes his free hand and squeezes it in support.

It’s not long before Fia—Tiernan and Aislin’s mom—shows up. A man named Conan too. I’ve heard Cillian and the guys mention him often. More come and go—Flynn, Blain, Finan, Torin, and a few others whose names I won’t remember.

The house is busy, and if I thought the mini mob said fuck every other word, it’s quadrupled here.

These violent, murderous, drug-and-arms-dealing men who laugh and joke with each other.

Who tease each other and trip over furniture and talk about people they love.

They’re human, just like the rest of us.

Cillian talks a lot with Conan, with his aunt and the others, his body less tense and his heart more open with them than it is with his dad.

There are eyes on me often. I’m the outsider, the one they aren’t sure of, but no one watches me more than Rian.

He watches both me and Cillian almost constantly.

Even when he has discussions with others, his gaze often darts toward us, studying, curious…

sad. Rian O’Shea is an asshole, yes, one who hasn’t been a good father to Cillian, but he’s living with a broken heart.

I pull my gaze away from Rian and give it back to Cillian, Rory, Tiernan, Conan, and Finan as they speak.