Page 23 of Sweet Vengeance (Sins of the Father #2)

Ollie

I’m walking out of the building from my third class of the day, when I see a shock of red hair peeking from around the building.

That better not be who I think it is.

I’m not proud of the way my feet stomp down the stairs, then on the sidewalk, until I round the corner and see Rory leaning against the wall, one of his legs bent, his foot flat against the brick, his arms crossed. “Fancy seeing you here.”

“I don’t think it is. You’re following me.”

“I’m not following you. You’re following me.”

“This is my class!”

He shrugs. “Semantics. Should we go get your shit and take you home?”

“Where’s Cillian?”

“You’re cute when you’re mad.”

“Oh my God. Would you stop flirting with me? I’m pissed at you—well, and him. Tell him I’m not coming.” If he can’t even keep his promise, why should I keep mine? Plus, he doesn’t even care enough to follow me himself? He sends Rory to do it for him?

There’s more stomping going on as I walk away.

I’m not surprised to hear footsteps behind me, and Rory steps up beside me, keeping pace. “You’re coming home with me.”

“You guys don’t make my decisions for me. I’m not your…I don’t know…capos or whatever.”

He laughs. “We’re not Italian, and those are mob bosses. Please come home with me. Cillian already had a bad day, and though he’ll probably be a dick the whole time, he’ll want you there. If not, he’ll come to you and then get into it with Tiernan.”

This is the second time Tiernan is brought up when it comes to me and Cillian. Is Cillian risking something by doing…whatever it is we’re going? “Why did he have a bad day?” I ask, my anger already softening, damn him.

“Just some shit with his dad, but it’s not my story to tell.”

“I’ve never even met his dad and I hate him.”

Rory cocks a red brow at me. “He talk to you about Rian?”

I toss his words back at him. “Not my story to tell.”

Rory laughs. “I see why Cil likes you so much. Seriously, though. Come home with me.”

“He sent you to babysit me after promising he wouldn’t!”

“Because he cares…and Cillian has never cared before.”

“If he cares so much, where is he?” The second the words slip out, I want them back. Why did I say that? Why do I feel that?

“Wait. So you’re not mad he lied about keeping an eye on you, just that he didn’t do it himself? Damn, Bunny. Maybe you’re more like us than I thought. Possessive over your man? Or at least you want him to be possessive over you.”

“That’s not what I meant!” Though it is, in some ways. “I shouldn’t have said that. My brain is in a weird place.”

“He would have been here. He needed to go to class, but we were going to switch places before he got all up in his head about his father. Come stay with us. He wants you. I want him to get what he wants.”

My heart gets melty. I’ve never met two people who love each other as much as Cillian and Rory.

It’s a special relationship, one that’s maybe not completely healthy, but part of me wishes I had something like that too…

just like part of me enjoys Cillian wanting to protect and take care of me. God, this is all so messed up.

“Fine, but only because he’s upset about the stuff with his dad. I can’t understand why he isn’t better to Cillian.”

“You and me both,” Rory says as we begin walking again. “Fuck, man, parents are hard. I’m glad I don’t have any.”

“Everyone has parents.”

“Yeah, I guess.”

Rory and I head back to my dorm, and he waits while I pack up my things.

The whole time, I’m thinking about Cillian.

I’m angry he lied to me, but I know in his own way, it’s because he cares.

Is that me making excuses for him? I don’t want to be that kind of guy, and also, how much can he care since he also made sure to stress this is just about sex?

“You ready?” Rory asks, and I realize I’m just standing there staring.

“Yeah.”

I wonder what happened with his father today. Cillian seems so carefree about so many things, like emotions don’t factor into many of his decisions, but I know they do with his dad. I could feel it the one and only time we talked about him.

Rory leads me to a car, which I recognize as Cillian’s. We make the short drive to their house, Rory sucking incessantly on his vape.

“Sorry. Lost my fidget spinner,” he says, and I wave him off. I’m not in the mood to complain right now.

“Is Cillian home?”

“He’s out with Tiernan. They’ll be back in a little while. Dean and Aislin are there.”

I nod, trying to internally deny the stab of disappointment I feel that Cillian isn’t home.

Is he okay after whatever happened with his dad?

Does Tiernan have him out doing things he shouldn’t be out doing, especially when he’s feeling down?

I shift uncomfortably at the thought—not only about what he could be doing, but at Tiernan.

With the way Dean cares about him and how Cillian would do anything for him, there must be something good in him that I don’t see, but honestly, I have my doubts.

I get out of the car and go to grab my bags, but Rory grabs one himself and hands me the other.

“Thanks.” I hate the feeling of discomfort weighing down at the back of my neck at the thought of being here without Cillian.

He shouldn’t make me feel safer or more comfortable, but he does.

Dean should probably be the one to give me that feeling—since he’s my friend and we lived together last year, even if sporadically after Tiernan came into the picture—but instead, it’s Cillian whose presence soothes me.

I walk beside Rory up to the house. He presses a code and opens the door. “Do you want to smoke a bowl?” Rory asks.

“No. I told you I don’t smoke weed.”

“More for me.” He sets my bag down and turns toward the living room. Dean is sitting on the couch with Aislin.

“Hey. What’s up? You can set your bag down and sit,” Dean tells me, and I do, taking one of the armchairs.

“I’m going upstairs. Let me know if you need anything,” Rory tells me, and I feel a strange twinge at him leaving. Being close to him feels safe because of his relationship with Cillian.

“We’ve been around each other but never been properly introduced. I’m Aislin.” She holds her hand out to shake.

“Ollie.”

“Though I hear it’s Kitten to Cillian. That’s what Rory says, at least.” She smiles, and like happens too often around this group of people, my cheeks heat.

“It’s just a…thing.” It’s the only excuse I can think of.

“Do you know anything about being with girls?” Dean asks me.

My eyebrows nearly shoot to the ceiling. “Huh?”

“Women. Have you ever dated one? I don’t know much about your sex life. Ash is talking to this girl for the first time. She’s asking me for advice, and not only do I have zero experience with girls, I also suck at having conversations like this.” Dean rubs a hand over his buzzed hair.

“You’re better than you think,” she tells him, then looks at me and makes a funny face as if to say he’s not.

I chuckle. While I like Dean a lot, I can’t really see him as someone who is super easy to talk to.

“You would think it would be easier to talk to girls, since I am one, but we’re just as confusing as boys.”

I give her a shrug and a smile. “I’m gay. I’ve never even kissed a girl, but I can still try to help.”

“Really? Awesome! It’s this girl from one of my classes—Zuri.

We talk in class a lot. We’ve even started texting, but I’ve asked her to meet up twice—once for coffee and once for lunch—and both times she’s been kinda cagey about it and said no.

I don’t know how to tell if she’s interested or not.

Does she even realize I’m trying to date her? ”

“I assume asking her if she’s interested is out of the question?”

“Oh my God! Yes. At least right now. This is all kinda new for me. I haven’t dated girls before, but I’m interested.

” She changes positions on the couch, pulling her long, black hair over her shoulder.

“I just don’t want to mess something up…

or push her away if she’s not interested in anything other than friendship.

It’s hard to make friends for…well, reasons.

I think that’s why I clung to him the way I did. ” She points to Dean with her thumb.

“So I was a consolation prize?”

She hugs him. “No. You know I love you, and now you’re practically my brother.” Aislin gives her attention back to me. “You seem smart. What should I do?”

“Umm…I’m book smart, not people smart. Honestly, I’ve never dated anyone in my life.”

“From what I’ve heard, Cillian claimed you.”

Dean nudges her.

“Wait. What is going on here? Who is telling you guys this stuff? It’s just…sex.”

“You’re fucking Cillian?” Dean blurts out.

Didn’t they know that? I rub a hand over my face. Having friends is hard. I’m not any more familiar with this kind of thing than they seem to be. “Oh my God.”

“Aww, his face is so red. Look how cute. We don’t really get embarrassed around here.” Aislin oohs and aahs over me like I’m a doll or something.

“I knew he wanted to fuck you, I just didn’t think you’d do it,” Dean explains.

“Well, he’s really hot,” are the first words out of my mouth, which embarrasses me even more.

But then all the reasons this is a disaster start raining down on me.

“It’s just a thing. We’re only hooking up for like…

a little while. He doesn’t do relationships, and I couldn’t…

we aren’t a fit for anything more than that. ”

Dean frowns, and I know he understands what I’m saying, why I couldn’t be more with Cillian, and honestly? It makes my stomach tangle in knots, makes me feel two inches tall. Cillian has never been anything but caring to me.

Even if I wanted more, though, he wouldn’t.

“Let’s talk about something else.”

Aislin tells me more about Zuri, then swaps topics to the women’s self-defense class she runs on campus. Dean is so different with her, completely relaxed and more open than he’s ever been with me. It’s not hard to tell how much she means to him.

“Cillian is going to teach me some self-defense moves,” I admit.

“Okay, I know you don’t want to talk about it, but this is all so cute. Cillian’s never been like this with anyone before.” Aislin beams.

Unexpected hope blooms in my chest, and I try to tamp it down.

Before I can drive myself crazy trying to sort through what that means, or have to come up with a response, I hear the door open, Cillian and Tiernan saying something to each other as they come in.

Just like everything when it comes to him, my response is a mixture of two things—part nerves because I don’t know what to expect, and the rest desire along with the need to make sure he’s okay.

Cillian doesn’t need me for that. He’s got a house full of people he loves and who will do anything for him.

But I can’t help wondering if even they don’t see all the sides of Cillian, if there are pieces of him they can’t reach.

I look up to see Tiernan walk over to Dean, pulling him to his feet and searing their mouths together with this crackling intensity and craving for each other I feel in the air every time I’m around them.

I glance over to see Cillian with his back to me. He’s at the bar in their living room, pouring a drink.

Look at me, look at me, look at me.

“Hey,” Tiernan says, pulling my attention away from Cillian. “Anything that goes on in this house—”

“I don’t want to know about it,” I interrupt. “I don’t ever want to know any of it.”

Every time Tiernan looks at me, I could swear he hates me.

There’s so much anger sizzling beneath the surface, but logically I know it’s not truly directed at me.

He always seems like he’s in control, but like the smallest thing can make him snap, and I have yet to find a way to be comfortable around that.

I shiver but hope no one notices.

“Good,” he replies. “But some of the shit won’t be avoidable. You’re Cil’s responsibility. You fuck up, that reflects badly on him, and—”

“What! No. That’s not fair. I don’t plan to do anything I’m not supposed to do, but you can’t hold him responsible for my actions.

” What if I accidentally mess up? What if I don’t mean to but do something wrong and then Cillian has to deal with the consequences?

“I’d rather risk being alone than him being on the line. ”

I’m surprised when Tiernan cocks a brow, looking amused. “Even if being on your own gets you killed? Or hurt?”

“Tiernan,” Cillian says sharply, and if I’m not mishearing, warningly too.

Tiernan ignores him. “I asked you a question.”

“Yes. I’m not used to this stuff, but I won’t risk Cillian getting in trouble for me. I’ll only stay if you only hold me responsible for my actions and not Cillian.”

“Kitten,” Cillian says. “That’s not—”

“It’s the only way I’ll stay!” I shout, without meaning to. “I don’t work that way. I don’t want anyone getting hurt, certainly not because of me.”

Both Dean and Tiernan look over at Cillian.

I stand. “Don’t defer to him like I can’t make choices for myself.”

Dean smiles, and Tiernan gives me a slight chuckle before speaking. “Sit the fuck down, Ollie. You’re not going anywhere.”

“Was our brave little bunny about to fight Tiernan for Cil?” Rory walks into the room. “Dean said when they first met, he was ready to go after him when Dean came home with hickeys all over. He wanted to make sure Dean was safe.”

“I like him!” Aislin chimes in while I’m trying not to melt into the floor. I fully get that there’s not much I can do to protect anyone, so hearing them talk like this just makes me feel foolish.

“Come on, let’s take your shit up to my room,” Cillian says.

His room. I’ll be staying in his room. Of course, I knew that. I’ve been sleeping with him at my place too, but I swear, it feels like everyone is looking at me, and for the second time in a minute, I feel like they’re laughing at me.