Page 15 of Sunrise (Monarch Club #3)

Sophie

Wandering the halls after closing time, when the Monarch Club is scrubbed clean and restocked, is my least favorite time to be here. I prefer the bass of sexy music, red lit rooms, and the sound of leather and chains.

I’m not Sophie the scientist during those hours. I’m Mistress. If ever I had to choose one over the other, there’s no debate who I’d be. Adjusting my robe, I head down to the basement where Dmitri sleeps, as is my norm.

But he doesn’t stay here anymore. He’s with Daelyn at their house outside the city.

Funny that my feet would automatically take me this way.

Bypassing his door, I take the stairwell back up to the main floor and wander the halls, eventually making my way to Ryker’s office.

He’s probably not here anymore, either. He has Tara waiting at home for him.

The door is half open and I hear typing.

Quietly knocking, I peek my head in. Ry’s got this harsh look on his face as he types. He looks up and pauses, all his features softening instantly. “Soph.”

“Can I come in?”

“Of course.” He pushes away from his desk and relaxes. “You okay?”

I don’t know what I am anymore. “Yes.”

“You don’t look it.”

“I’m exhausted, that’s all.”

“You’ve been pushing yourself too much.” Ryker walks around his desk and sits down in the leather chair next to mine. “Why is that?”

“I haven’t pushed myself.”

“You practically live at the club.” He takes my hand and runs his thumb over my knuckles. “Someone who buries themselves in work is usually hiding from something.”

My hackles rise. “I’m not hiding from anything.” Lies . “I just prefer to be here. Is that a problem?”

“Yes.”

My heart slumps.

“You need a life outside this place, Soph. I know you love what you do here, but you should take breaks. This place can become just as addicting as any other vice.”

“Are you calling me a sex addict, Mr. Hudson?”

His mouth forms a thin line. The silence between us makes me shiver.

“Do you want to talk about the panic button incident?”

I shake my head. “There isn’t anything to say. I just had a moment. I’m sorry I abused the safety system.”

“You didn’t abuse a fucking thing. That’s what it’s there for.” He tips my chin, so I’ll look at him. “I’m proud of you for smashing it.”

“It was for nothing.”

“It was for your safety, which is precisely why I installed those things.”

He’s right. I don’t know why I’m apologizing for doing what I needed to in that session. I wish I could explain the whole truth, which is perched on the tip of my tongue. But that’s not possible. I can, however, explain myself a little to ease his worries.

“He tapped his thumb on his thigh in a specific way.” Chills race down my spine. “That’s all.”

Ryker studies my expression, which I try to keep unreadable.

“He didn’t say anything?”

“No,” I say quickly. Ryker would have studied the footage.

They all probably did. “He only snapped his fingers when his partner tried to share anything with me that could have been personal. And he just watched us. But the tapping of his thumb…” Thump-tha-thump.

Thump-tha-thump . I mimic it and confess, “I got a bad feeling and panicked.”

“We’ve blacklisted both of them, so they won’t be invited back.”

I feel guilty. They were probably a lovely couple, and I just ruined their chances of exploring their kinks in the best sex club around.

As much as I want to tell Ryker to not go that far, I also know that I don’t want to be on edge every night at the club, looking over my shoulder for them.

She was sweet, but he was… yeah. No. I’m not defending them, no matter if they’re innocent or not.

This is my safe space. They’re not tainting it with their presence.

“Thank you,” I say, feeling relieved. “That makes me feel better.”

“Good.” Ryker returns to his chair behind the desk. I think I’m about to be dismissed, but he asks, “ How were Vault and Knox?”

I lift a brow. “You know already. I’m sure you watched.”

“Not all of it,” he says. “Dmitri and I took it in shifts, and he didn’t give me many details.”

My attitude turns a little feral, and I think it’s because I’m protective of them. “How many details did you want, Mr. Hudson?”

He’s not threatened by me. “I want to know your endgame, Sophie.”

“ My endgame?” I shake my head. “My arrangements with them are—”

“I’m not talking about your arrangements. I’m asking about your fucking endgame.”

Of course he’s going to be protective over his friends. I might be in the Monarch family, but I’m an add-on, not an original. And I’ve lied to this man from the beginning, which I’m scared he’ll eventually find out and blacklist me, too. “I have no idea.”

“Yes, you do.” God, I think he’s going to burn a hole in my retinas with how hard he’s glaring at me. “What is it?”

“I. Don’t. Know.” That’s as honest as it gets. I really have no idea what the end of my arrangement with Knox and Vault will look like. I’ve tried to imagine it a gazillion times and can’t figure it out.

“What do you want it to be?”

That’s the million-dollar question, isn’t it?

I’d rather not admit that I’m in love with Ryker’s two best friends.

I haven’t even fully admitted it to myself yet.

Besides, his loyalty will lie with them, not me, and I can’t risk Ryker telling them how I feel.

I’m not ready and may never be. Hell, I don’t even know how they feel about me outside the bedroom, so we’re putting the cart before the horse here.

“I want them together,” I say flatly. “That’s all I fucking want.” The words “with me” do not come from my lips, but my heart screams it.

“Is that all?”

“Isn’t that enough?” Hell, a year ago, even five years ago, that would have been too much to ask for. “They belong together.”

“I know that. But where do you belong, Sophie?”

Jesus, why is he being so annoying this morning? Steeling myself, I roll my shoulders back and say, “I belong right where I am, Mr. Hudson.” Shoving up from my chair, I leave and slam the door shut behind me.

???

Marching back to the Butterfly Suite, I pull my shit together. These men don’t need a precious petal running scenes, they need a professional.

I am a professional.

Shit, I forgot my stupid key to the room. They’re probably asleep, considering they were out all night, so I don’t want to knock and wake them.

Mid-spin on my heels, I freeze when the door opens, and Knox pops his head out. “Where the fuck you going now, woman?”

Why do I feel better anytime I see this man? A little weight lifts off my shoulders just looking at him. How can someone’s mere existence do that? “I forgot my key and thought you guys would be asleep by now. I didn’t want to wake you.”

“As if we’d fall asleep without you between us. Pssht.” He playfully snags my arm and pulls me inside. “Come on, now.” He pats my ass. “You should know better than that.”

I giggle, feeling better by the second. “Well, it’s not like we’ve done this before, pup.”

Vault studies us cautiously from the other side of the room.

“You two must be exhausted.” I let my robe drop and saunter over to him. Cradling his head in my hands, I let him nuzzle my breasts.

His fingers dig into my back as he breathes deep. “We were worried about you.”

“There’s nothing to worry about. I just went for a walk.” I absentmindedly run my fingers through his short-cropped hair. Knox climbs into bed and pats the space next to him.

I have no idea where I belong, but that looks as good a place as any this morning. Climbing between two broken men, I close my eyes and sleep until the club opens.