Page 57 of Someone to Call My Own
“That’s the day we physically met, but I’d dreamed of you before then,” I reminded him. “I didn’t see your face, but I heard your voice, and I felt your arms around me as you made love to me slow and deep like you do every morning. Do you know what you said to me afterward that scared me to death?”
“Thanks for the good time?” he asked smartly. I could tell it was his way of grappling with emotions he wasn’t always sure how to process. Jon might’ve been older and worldlier in some ways, but it was up to me to show him how to love openly.
“You said, ‘I love you, Em,’ and it scared the fuck out of me.”
“Because you weren’t ready,” Jon replied patiently.
“In part, yes, but also because it felt truer than anything I’d ever experienced in my life. Loving someone is a risk; one I wasn’t brave enough to accept at the time.”
“You’re brave enough now.”
“Somedays I still wake up terrified that I’ll lose you or that you were a mere dream I created to ease the loneliness I felt in my heart.” The burning behind my eyes and in the back of my nose warned of pending tears. “But then you slide up behind me—”
“—and inside you.”
“And I’m no longer afraid.”
Jon closed his eyes and pressed his forehead to mine. “You’re not the only one who worries. There are days I wake up thinking that I’m too dirty and tainted to touch anyone as precious as you.”
“Because of your career or your previous club membership?” That got his attention.
Jon looked horrified that I’d had a vision, so I set his mind at ease right away. “It wasn’t something that I saw, but overheard. You mentioned Voodoo while talking to Corbin, and I got curious. I looked it up on the internet and saw that it catered to gentlemen with specific needs.”
“That was a different lifetime, Emory. I’m not that same man who got off on the things he saw or did there.”
“Jon, I’m not bringing this up because I’m trying to shame you or make you feel bad. I wasn’t angry about yourpastmembership there; I was curious.”Am curious.
Jon’s cocky smile said that he didn’t miss the change in tone I used. “I gave up my membership,” he confirmed. “Curiosity can be a very dangerous thing, my heart.” There was nothing sexier than a badass man saying sugary sweet things or using pet names. I knew it was genuine and came from the heart he’d kept guarded all these years until I came along.
“I simply want you to recreate some of your favorite things in the privacy of our own home. Did you like to tie your man up—”
Jon pressed the palm of his hand over my mouth to quiet me. My tongue darted out to lick his flesh, and I tasted a hint of the muffin he’d held in his hand mixed with his natural saltiness. It made me want other saltier parts of him.
“They were never my men, Emory. That title is yours and yours alone. They were playthings or distractions to keep my mind away from dark places that threatened to consume me. That’s a horrible thing to say about living, breathing humans, but I didn’t care about them beyond them making me come and doing the same for them. It was the basest kind of sex—hollow and meaningless. Do not compare what I was then to who I am now in the same sentence.” He removed his hand slowly from my mouth like he feared how I would react to his words.
“I’m your safe place, Jon. There is nothing you can say or do that would make me love you less. If you’re going to be truly happy, then I want to make sure you’re not suppressing parts of you. I’m not afraid of your baser needs, in fact, I’m intrigued by them. Ever since I found out about your membership there, I’ve pictured us doing so many things.”
Jon took a sudden step back, grabbed my hand, and tugged me forward to follow him down the sidewalk. “Too bad this town doesn’t have a cab service.”
“It’s only three blocks to our house,” I said excitedly. Oh boy! It was all I could do to keep from yanking my hand back so I could rub mine together gleefully. I was finally going to get the fucking I had begged him for the past few weeks.
“Three blocks too fucking many,” he groused as he walked faster until I practically had to jog to keep up with his long strides.
His grip on my hand tightened the closer we got to home like he feared I might change my mind and flee. He had nothing to worry about because there was a higher probability of an asteroid crashing into our house. He didn’t let go of me until we reached the front porch and he needed his hand to unlock the door. He pushed the door open so hard that it crashed into the wall and rattled the pictures hanging there.
“Oh dear,” I said, but it wasn’t from fear. I knew I was about to see Jon take fucking to a whole new level. That first time in his house was nothing more than an appetizer before the main course.
Jon shut and locked the door before he crooked his finger at me, and I went to him. He began undressing me immediately, and I stood before him completely naked while he remained fully dressed. His dominance was etched in both his expression when he looked at me and in his rigid posture. Jon placed his hand on my shoulder and pushed me to my knees in front of him.
“Take out my cock and get it nice and wet, Emory.”
“Oh dear.” I repeated, sounding like a twittering old lady. Jon’s wicked grin expressed how much he liked his effect on me.
I lowered myself to my knees but didn’t take out his hard cock right away. I teased him through his jeans with my hands and teeth. Jon’s sharp hiss was a reward for my boldness.
“Oh dear,” he said. I glanced up to see if he was mocking me, but he was too far gone to be a smartass.
Jon’s hands were firm but gentle when he cupped my head and pressed his crotch harder against my face while I rolled his firm balls in my hands. I could smell his arousal, and it made my dick leak all over the wooden floors. I could tell he wasn’t wearing underwear under his button-fly jeans and it made it so much more exciting to know only a few buttons separated me from Jon’s dick.