Page 18 of Someone to Call My Own

“Wow,” I said softly. “That’s a wonderful thing to do.” I had done a few of those types of things to honor River as well, but they never brought me the peace I sought. I hoped that it worked better for him.

Jonathon looked at me and winked. “I have my moments,” he said. His tone of voice and expression was friendlier than I wanted it to be and I wasn’t sure how to react.

Somehow, most of us decided we had enough room for coffee and dessert. The small talk continued as everyone except Kyle ate scrumptious sweets. Talk turned to travel and various places that Jonathon and I lived. My list of places wasn’t quite as exotic as his, and I found myself drawn to the deep timbre of his voice.

“What brought you here after living at all those fabulous places?” Chaz asked the both of us.

“I’m researching for a book that I’m planning to write,” I said, hoping to clarify the blunder I made earlier. “I like it here, although I’m a little worried about the number of homicides in a small town.” The room got quiet, and I realized I said something wrong. “What did I say?”

“My brother was one of the guys killed here,” Silver told me.

“Oh damn,” I said. “I’m so sorry, Jon.”

Jon?I didn’t know the man well enough to touch him or use a nickname, but it felt inexplicably right. I placed my hand over Silver’s. There it was again, that burn and sizzle that I’d never felt before, not even… No! I would not go there. It was wrong to think like that. Yet, touching him felt… familiar. I wanted to jerk my hand back but couldn’t.

“It’s okay, Emory.” Silver smiled softly and turned his hands over to squeeze mine before he pulled them back. He rose from his chair and said, “I should be heading back to the city. Gabe. Thank you for inviting me to dinner.” He then turned to Josh and said, “Dinner was magnificent. Thank you so much.” His words of gratitude couldn’t disguise the sadness I heard in his voice.

“Anytime,” Josh told him. “Have a safe trip home.”

The room grew quiet as everyone seemed to get lost in their own thoughts after Gabe walked Jonathon downstairs to say goodbye. I felt terrible for upsetting the guy so much that he practically ran out the door. I felt like I ruined everyone’s evening and the best thing I could do was head home.

“I’m going to head home too,” I said. “I have an early day tomorrow.” I didn’t have a fucking clue what I was going to do, but it sounded as good as any other excuse I could make up on the fly.

“Oh, I hate that you’re leaving so soon,” Josh said. He rose to his feet and offered me a friendly hug. “Thanks for coming tonight, Emory.”

“Thanks for the invite. You’ve all been wonderful company. I’ll see you at my appointment in a few days.”

“I’ll be sure to sharpen my scissors,” Josh replied then laughed evilly.

“Goodnight,” I said with a wave.

“Goodnight, Emory,” they all said collectively.

When I got downstairs, Jon was still talking to Gabe at the door. “I am sorry that I disrespected your relationship with my flirting. It won’t happen again.”

“Thanks,” Gabe told him. “I’ll be in touch if I learn anything else.” Jon nodded his head and walked out the back door.

Gabe turned when he saw that I’d come downstairs too.

“Man, I feel terrible that I ran your friend off, Gabe.”

“You didn’t run him off,” he replied. “His loss was recent, and he’s still coming to terms with things.”

“Still, I didn’t help matters any.”

“You can’t be blamed for what you didn’t know, Emory.” Gabe tipped his head to the side, and I could tell he was deliberating if he should ask me a question.

“Go ahead and ask me,” I told him.

“Did you have a vision or something when you shook Silver’s hand?”

“Yeah, you could say that,” I replied dryly. “He wasn’t in danger in my vision, if that was what you were concerned about.” Gabe looked relieved. “Thank you for a lovely evening,” I said. “I’ll see you around the neighborhood.”

“Take care, Emory.”

I held my shit together until I got home then I did two things I hadn’t done in quite some time. I got rip-roaring drunk and prayed for a night without dreams. I didn’t want to see Jon Silver again in my sleep, and I sure as hell couldn’t face my husband.

Ididn’t leave Gabe and Josh’s house because I was upset; I left because the evening stirred feelings inside me that I didn’t want or need in my life. I still felt out of place in the sit-down dinners with fancy china, real silverware, and crystal drinking glasses, because until I met Nate, I was a takeout food and paper plate kind of guy. I was slowly becoming acclimated to the finer things in life, even though I tried not to get too dependent on them. I didn’t want to become too soft, in case I needed to uproot my life and start all over again someplace. It wasn’t the dishes or silver that had me on edge; it was the people—or their close relationship to be specific.