Page 37 of So This is Christmas

The welcoming embrace of the Wynters seeped its way into the Christmas festivities.

They cooked the breakfast together, they chatted about all kinds of things – Vienna, England, traditions, favourite foods and board games.

Sophie told them all about the time she’d played Mary in a school nativity and Jennie said she’d been an angel.

Nick had been a wise man, something Walter approved of.

‘We were so proud, watching him that day,’ said Walter.

Sophie didn’t tell any of them that when she’d played Mary she’d had to pretend she had an entire family watching in the audience, whereas in reality her mother hadn’t even shown up.

The Wynters’ breakfast feast was quite something and Sophie was glad she wasn’t wearing tight jeans.

Instead, she was wearing a gorgeous long bottle-green velvet skirt she’d paired with a black turtleneck jumper and smart leather boots.

She’d even put Bea’s necklace on. She hadn’t worn it so far but today it felt right.

Jennie had spotted it too, her own fingers resting against Greta’s necklace and the G as she smiled across at Sophie in acknowledgement.

Sophie hated that finally Jennie had opened up to her, that she’d done the same in return, and that the atmosphere had thawed between them and soon she would have to ruin the equilibrium they’d found.

She finished the pancakes Walter had served up and when the other two weren’t looking, Walter asked whether she was okay. She assured him that she was but they both knew what she was thinking. They both knew that the truth would have to come out soon after today.

Nick had looked at her more than once as they made the breakfast and as they ate, and she’d avoided his gaze every time. She wanted to go to him, to let him wrap his arms around her, let him kiss her. But she couldn’t.

Once they’d washed and dried up and wiped down the surfaces they pulled on coats, hats and gloves ready for the winter walk.

‘We’ll start preparing the lunch when we return,’ said Walter, locking the door behind them.

‘I can’t eat another thing,’ Jennie said quietly to Sophie.

Walter didn’t pick up on it. ‘And we’ll enjoy some of my glühwein,’ he announced as they filed down the stairs.

They walked around the local area for just under an hour.

The snow had stopped but this time it had been way more than a flurry.

Outlines of footprints lingered on the pavements, snow clung to branches on the trees.

Christmas decorations on shop fronts looked all the more authentic with the shop canopies dusted with real snow.

It was magical and everything Bea had told Sophie it would be.

‘Greta would’ve loved being out in this,’ said Walter, his arm linked through Nick’s as Sophie and Jennie walked alongside one another.

Jennie said quietly, ‘Greta would’ve been complaining her feet were cold.’

Sophie smiled. ‘Let’s keep that between us.’

‘Deal.’

They’d only just started to become friends, her and Jennie, and in a day, maybe two if they decided to enjoy the togetherness a bit longer, that would come to an end.

When they got back to the apartment Jennie hung back while Sophie lifted her coat onto one of the hooks. ‘Elliot called again this morning.’

Sophie picked up her scarf which had fallen to the floor. ‘You’ve got a good one there.’

‘I hope so.’

Before Sophie could head for the kitchen Jennie asked, ‘Sophie, is everything all right?’

‘Of course.’ She put on a bigger smile and moved away from anything deeper than, ‘I’m ridiculously full from that breakfast, though – it wasn’t comfortable putting on my boots.’

Jennie laughed. ‘Same here, and now it’s on to the lunch menu, so be warned.’

They chatted as they prepared the food, Walter trying to be the one who did it all while they sat and took it easy, none of them letting him get his way.

And when the preparation was done and the turkey in the oven, they each took a generous serving of glühwein into the living room where Nick had lit the fire.

Walter looked like he was up to something and when Sophie clocked Nick and Jennie, they both looked like they were in on it too.

‘What’s going on?’

Nobody admitted anything. There were smiles, an air or trepidation and then Sophie’s eyes fell on something new hanging in front of the fireplace.

When she was last here, there had been three stockings – Jennie’s, Nick’s, and Walter’s. But now there was a fourth one, a beautiful red velvet stocking with white stitching and the name Sophie in big letters.

‘What do you think?’ Walter asked when Sophie said nothing.

For a moment blood rushed to her ears. She was a fake, she had kept an awful truth from Jennie, but when she looked at how happy Walter was she knew she had to hold it together at least a while longer for his and everyone else’s sake.

‘I think it’s beautiful.’ She hugged him tightly.

When she was six, Sophie had put a stocking at the end of her bed after she’d heard the kids at school telling stories of putting empty stockings in place and waking up to find them full.

Sophie had desperately wanted to see whether the same could happen to her.

Would Father Christmas finally stop at her house and bring a toy, or some sweets, a surprise that delighted her?

That year she’d squeezed her eyes tightly shut and climbed beneath the covers.

It had taken her forever to go to sleep and when she woke she really believed something was going to be inside the stocking.

She’d looked at the flat sock, white-turned-grey in the wash, an old over-the-knee sock rather than a proper stocking, and she knew it was empty.

She’d cried her heart out.

Sophie had never put a stocking out again after that year.

And she never really had a good Christmas until Martin came into her life, and then Hayden.

Martin had loved Christmas. He had insisted they both have an Advent calendar, they leave mince pies and a glass of port by the fireplace for Father Christmas plus a carrot for the reindeer the way he’d done as a kid, and when Sophie found herself a single parent she kept the tradition going.

She’d creep into her son’s bedroom once he was asleep and fill his stocking for him, she’d leave gifts by the tree, she made the day everything that it should be.

Now, she couldn’t take her eyes away from the stocking with her name on it. ‘I don’t know what to say, Walter. I’m incredibly touched.’

‘I had it made for you a couple of days after you knocked on my front door.’ He stood next to her as she warmed herself in front of the fire.

‘How did you know I’d come here for Christmas?’

‘Oh, I knew. And it’s just what Bea and Greta would’ve wanted.’ He put an arm around her shoulders and gave her a squeeze. ‘Merry Christmas, Sophie. I’m glad you’re wearing the necklace too. Bea was right to give it to you.’

‘Thank you. It’s really special.’

‘Good. Now, there’s a little something inside the stocking.’

‘There is?’ Nick asked.

Walter laughed. ‘Don’t worry, all three of you have something.’

They each went to grab their stockings, and when Sophie put her hand into hers she took out a small box.

She tugged off the ruby-red ribbon, opened the box and pulled back the tissue paper before hooking her fingers through a bottle-green ribbon to take out a glass ornament.

It was clear glass and on the front in white frosted lettering, as if it had been left there by snowfall, was her name.

She looked at the others and they each had one, as did Walter.

‘I had them made for us,’ said Walter. ‘I ordered the stocking and thought these would make a good addition to the tree.’

Each of them went over to find the best place amongst the branches.

Sophie put hers further around the tree and hid behind the beautiful fir for a moment pretending to take her time easing the ribbon onto the branch.

Really she was hiding the emotional bomb going off inside of her.

Without the secret she and Walter were keeping from Jennie this would be such a happy moment, but how could it be with the truth lurking over them?

Walter suggested a game of Scrabble and they had something else to focus on. They chose to play in the kitchen, meaning they’d be able to see to the lunch at the same time, hopping up and sitting down whenever was required.

It was so long since Sophie had had anything like this. The closest she’d come was group dinners at the Tapestry Lodge when she was working.

She’d expected to come to Vienna, deliver the letter and the news about Bea, and then go on her way.

She’d never expected to discover the link between her and Jennie.

She hadn’t expected to be attracted to Nick as much as she was.

And she definitely hadn’t expected to feel as if she belonged with these people.

And now, the thought of losing what she’d found terrified her.