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FIFTY-SEVEN

MADELINE

April turns to May. The Stars are playing unbelievable hockey, winning their first round playoffs series in four games and earning an extra few days off before the next round.

Lucy is thriving at school, happy and settled and over the moon with the friends she’s made this year.

Hudson and I are good . Every day we’re together, I come dangerously close to telling him how much I love him. It almost slipped out two nights ago when he was braiding my hair, wanting to learn how to style the long strands so he could help Lucy if she ever asked.

I chickened out, snapping my mouth closed and pretending like I had to hiccup.

From the smirk he tossed my way, I think he knows what I’m trying to say.

I like that he’s not rushing me, though.

He’s letting me do this on my terms, and I love him even more because of it.

I wake up to an empty bed on Sunday with sunlight streaming through the curtains. I pop up on an elbow and look around, wondering where Hudson is.

We don’t sleep separately anymore. Now that Lucy knows about us, he stays with me every night.

We just make sure to lock the door.

We fell asleep wrapped around each other last night, my leg thrown over his and his hand on my waist. I woke up in the middle of the night and kissed down his chest, smiling when he groaned and wrapped his fingers in my hair.

I tap my phone, shocked to see it’s past eight. It’s later than I normally sleep and I sigh, stretching my arms over my head. I’m reluctant to climb out of the warm sheets, but life must go on.

Before I can stand, a knock on the door makes me pause.

There are footsteps. A laugh followed by a softer giggle I’d recognize anywhere. I check to make sure my pajamas are back in place after Hudson took them off me last night and grin.

“Come in,” I call out, and the door flies open.

Lucy charges to me and jumps on the bed, arms wrapping around my neck.

Happy Mother’s Day, Mommy!

Oh, thank you, sweetheart .

I kiss the top of her head, laughing when she leans against me with such force, we tumble onto the pillows. I glance over at the door, finding Hudson there. He’s holding a tray stacked with plates and a cup of orange juice. There’s a single flower in a small vase, and when he smiles at me, I can’t help but smile back.

“We brought you breakfast.” He walks into the room and Lucy scoots over so he can join us on the bed. “Lucy and I made pancakes and bacon. With a side of mashed potatoes because they’re your favorite food.” He sets the tray in my lap, and I notice two cards next to the plates. “Happy Mother’s Day, Maddie.”

“Thank you ,” I whisper, wiping under my eyes. “ How early did you all get up to do this? ”

Early! Lucy tells me.

“ We were in the kitchen by six thirty. ” Hudson wraps an arm around me, pulling Lucy and me close. He’s gotten more open with his affection lately, and I like that he’s showing Lucy the right ways to be treated. “ I let you sleep in so you didn’t see our surprise .”

“ It’s the best surprise ever. ” I grin and open the card from Lucy. There’s a drawing inside, a heart made of her handprints and what must be a whole bucket of glitter. “ Wow. This is beautiful .”

We made it in art class at school . Ms. McNair told us to write our favorite things about our moms , and I wrote how much you love me . Lucy taps the card, and I see her list also includes things like my long hair and the cookies I bake. I said I have the best mom .

“ You’re so sweet . I love you, Lucy . Thank you for making me a mom .”

I love you too, Mommy. I’m going to go play with the doggies.

She slides off the bed after giving me another hug. Her little legs take her down the hall, and I glance at Hudson.

I don’t miss the way his shoulders seem heavy, how he almost hangs his head. There’s a smile on his face, but it’s strained. I reach over and take his hand in mine.

“I got you something,” I say, and he frowns.

“You got me something? For Mother’s Day?” he asks.

“It’s small.” I lean to my right and rifle through my bedside drawer. I find the package I’m looking for and hand it to him. “You told me your dad used to buy your mom flowers whenever she had a hard day, so I got some seeds for you. I thought we—sorry, you—could build a flower bed on your balcony and plant the seeds. You could have flowers whenever you want, and it could be like your mom is here with us all the time.”

He takes the seeds and runs his fingers over the letters on the packaging. “You… you did this for me?”

“I’m sure today must be hard for you, and I wanted to do something to make it less hard.”

“I—” Hudson closes his eyes and lets out a breath. He clutches the seeds like they’re the most important things in the world to him, and when he glances at me, a tear rolls down his cheek. “Thank you,” he whispers. “This is perfect.”

“I’m so glad you like it.” I take his hand and run my fingers over his knuckles. “There’s something else I want to say to you.”

“I love you,” he says all of a sudden, and I freeze. “I love you so much. You and Lucy are the greatest things to ever happen to me, and I… I love you so much it hurts , Maddie, to think about my life without you in it. I… I can’t hold it in anymore. I know I said I’d be patient, but you need to hear it and?—”

“I love you, too,” I blurt out, a sob escaping me with the four words. “I love you so much, and I’ve loved you for so long. Even when I didn’t know what the feeling was. You’ve done so much for me and for Lucy and… I just want to make sure you’re sure. That this is really want you want, because there’s not going to be a wedding. There aren’t going to be more kids. It’s going to be the three of us, and I want to know if that’s enough.”

“Enough?” He takes the tray from my lap and shoves it on the bedside table. “Sweetheart. You are everything to me. I want you , and I don’t give a shit about anything else.”

“You’d be okay without a wedding?”

“I don’t need one.”

“What if you want to be a dad one day down the road?”

“Lucy is a gift, and I’d be a lucky guy to be in her life as a father figure.”

“No one’s loved me in a very long time, and I’m not sure it’s going to be easy with all my baggage,” I whisper.

“Loving you is easier than anything I’ve ever done. It’s like breathing. Something that comes naturally, because I don’t have to think about it. You’re just… there. Perfect and wonderful and mine. Made for me, I think.”

I think he was made for me, too.

I’ve dreamed about what would’ve happened if Clark and I stayed together. If we worked out and he didn’t run, but in every version of that dream, I come up short of a happy ending. We would’ve split up eventually because of something else.

When I think of Hudson and me fifteen years down the road, I think of how happy I’ll be. The ways he’ll make me laugh and all the ways he’ll show me how much he cares.

It’s the most perfect image. True romance and everything anyone could ever want in life.

“Can you—” Another sob racks my body, and he’s there in an instant. Scooping me in his lap. Kissing the tears away. Being patient and wonderful, and I know he’s always going to be there. Steady, sure. Unrelenting. “Can you say it again?”

“Yeah.” Hudson’s smile is soft and slow, the beautiful kind I’ve felt in my soul from the second I first met him. “I love you, Madeline Galloway. I’ve loved you from the moment I laid eyes on you. I love how strong you are. How wonderful of a mother you are. I love your sarcasm, but I also love when you slow things down. You make me feel things I’ve never felt before. And if there’s ever a doubt in your mind, I want you to ask me, because that means I’m not doing a good enough job of showing you how fucking gone I am for you.”

“God.” I hiccup then laugh, fresh tears falling. “That was like a fucking poem, Hudson.”

“It’s true.” He moves my hair away from my forehead, kissing me there next. “Every word.”

“I love you. I think I’ve loved you for months, but I finally let myself accept it, you know? I’m sorry it took me so long to get here.”

“You’re right on time, sweetheart.”

I sigh. My tears turn happy, elated, and optimistic about the future. I’ve never felt this confident about anything in my life.

“What do we do now?” I ask, glancing up at him.

“We get Lucy back in here. We tell her I’m not going anywhere anytime soon, and then we’ll go get some dirt so we can plant some flowers. But only after you eat your breakfast, Mads.”

I roll my eyes, reaching for the food. “Bossy.”

“Bossy, yeah, but also obsessed,” Hudson says. “Just like I was when you made that chicken curry at Piper and Liam’s.”

“Are you sure you love me and not my cooking?” I tease, squealing when he rolls himself over me, mouth inches away from mine.

“Yeah,” he murmurs, a grin to rival the sun. “When I’m with you, I’m the most sure I’ve ever been about anything in my entire life.”