Page 159 of Sins of a King

I cradled my hand protectively against my chest. “One of those things I’d rather not talk about.”

“I don’t even know how we’re supposed to have a normal conversation anymore,” she muttered as I gestured for her to take a seat on the couch. I poured Ash a cup of coffee and then went to the penthouse windows to stare out at the park.

“I need you, Ash. I need your help. I wish I didn’t, because I really don’t want to involve you, but I can’t do this without you.”

“My help?” she asked, her voice full of wonder. “What could I possibly do for you?”

“Before I got kidnapped, I was feeding information to an FBI agent trying to take down Flynn.”

“Of course you were. What kind of information? Stuff about his brothel and casino?”

“There’s more to it,” I said slowly.

“More? How much more?”

“Have you heard of the SINS?”

An hour later, my best friend was gone and I sat alone, contemplating the person I’d become. The transition had begun when I met Flynn, but when I ended Vlad’s life, I’d become a liar, a murderer. I’d done it all in the name of love, but that didn’t matter. There was supposed to be a clear right and a wrong, black and white, only I no longer believed it. Somewhere along the way, I’d decided that I could live in the gray.

Was I no different from Dolinsky? Or Flynn, for that matter?

“What are you doing?” Flynn asked, jarring me from my reverie.

“I didn’t hear you come in,” I said, startled.

Flynn went to pour himself a drink. “Want one?” he asked, gesturing to his glass. I shook my head.

“Do you want to talk about it?” He came to the couch and took a seat next to me, but I didn’t lean into him.

“Just trying to work through things,” I evaded.

“That doesn’t happen overnight.”

“No. But I wonder…”

“Go on,” he said when I fell silent.

“I wonder if I’m dealing with it at all. Everything is happening so fast I don’t know if I have time to think. I barely have time to breathe.”

He stared into his glass. “How did your talk with Ash go?”

“Exactly like I thought.” I ran a hand through my hair. “She looks at me like she doesn’t even know who I am. Can’t say that I blame her.”

“You offered her a pass,” he reminded me. “When she told you she cheated on her fiancé, you didn’t make her feel bad about it.”

“Killing a person isn’t the same as cheating and you know it.”

“You told her you killed Dolinsky?” he asked in shock.

“Of course not. I refused to explain what happened to my finger. But she’s my best friend and can tell when things are off with me.”

“I don’t know what to say to comfort you.”

“There’s nothing youcansay.” I sighed. “You met with him?”

Flynn nodded. “I met with Marino.”

I couldn’t stop the grin from spreading across my face. “How much does he hate me?” I’d told Flynn everything from my meeting with Marino, including the slap.