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“That isn’t thinking of me. If you were thinking of me, as your grandson, and not your prodigy, you would have noticed how you were ruining my life.

I wasn’t happy leaving Crimson Bay. I wasn’t any better off in Georgia and I became a shell of the man I wanted to be when I went to Texas.

Brutal, focused, too serious, that's what they said about me. Not one person or one reporter ever commented on how happy I was, or how much I was enjoying my season. I went out to each game with two goals.” I meet his eyes, letting him see how much hatred pours out of me from what he did.

“I was going to ruin your dream and I was always going to go back to Emmarys.”

“That fire in you does come from me. It comes from the hard work you put in. You think pro-quarterbacks sit around at college and wonder, ‘gee how happy am I today?’ You have natural talent, and a damn fine mentality to win when you aren’t chasing skirt,” he huffs back.

My jaw tightens. I hate that even after all this time he can’t see that she’s more than a fling.

I need her to be happy, to ground me. Just like Momma did for my father.

Life could have been so different if he was here and if my grandfather was never handed the keys to my happiness.

“Doesn’t matter now. I have her and I’m still planning for the draft.

I’m going to make it there without you, in spite of you. ”

“I have no doubt you will, Hawke. I never did.” He nods his head and takes another drink before setting his glass down. “I can’t say I’m sorry because I believe I did the right thing then. I did it to protect you. To protect your legacy.”

“That's bullshit. You did it to control me, to keep holding on when I was ready to be on my own and call the shots. You didn’t think I could do it without you, but even after my inheritance kicked in, I’m still doing fine.

Hell, I’m playing better, smarter, with more edge than I ever have before and that's because I have Emma. I feel whole. I finally have a reason to play and succeed,” I argue.

He eyes me over his bushy brows, contemplating, not speaking.

We sit in silence for a few minutes too long and I’m ready to get up and walk away when he says, “I hope someday you’ll let me make right what I did and said when the news broke.

Your mother has said it time and again, you aren’t your father and I have to let you be your own person.

I didn’t want you to make the same mistake he did.

He gave up his dream to be with your momma and start a family.

I love your momma like my own daughter now, but there was a time I resented her. ”

I scoff. “That's why you keep her so tightly attached to you like your errand girl? You know she stays out of guilt, right? She loved him so much that she’s willing to keep taking care of you instead of living her life.”

“Be that as it may, I have a great fondness for her now. Sometimes it's easier to see things for what they are when enough time goes by. You, Falcon, your momma are the last living links I have to your father.” He shakes his head. “Grief never ends, Hawke.”

“Look, I’m not ready to forgive and forget.

I don’t even think I’m ready for this conversation.

I was surprised that you were here and that's why I agreed to meet. Bringing up my father, or how much we mean to you isn’t going to bring our issues to a close.

” I shake my head, sitting back in my chair.

This time he smiles. “Stubborn, just like him.”

Tired of hearing about my father, and ready to end the conversation, I lean forward, snatching his drink off the table and slamming it back like a shot. The whiskey burns and the faint hint of orange sits on my tongue, but I keep my face expressionless. “I’d say it's a family trait then.”

My grandfather laughs. He laughs. Something I think I’ve rarely heard in all the years he’s been in my life. For a split second I’m speechless, startled. In the past trading barbs would get me a scolding or a stern look. I don’t think I’ve ever seen this man crack a smile let alone laugh.

With his drink glass empty, he spreads his hands over the table before he stands, buttoning his suit jacket up again. “You did well tonight, Hawke. You didn’t have to meet me either, so thank you for that.”

My throat feels thick, emotions I’d rather not name creep up on me and my eyes burn.

We’ll never see eye to eye, and I’m not sure if I’ll ever forgive him or stop resenting him.

Deciding to branch off from his dream set me free.

I can’t change the past, but I damn sure plan to hold onto everything good I have now.

This time he doesn’t offer me a hand shake or barely a kind smile.

I get a nod. As a sign of what? Respect?

Maybe. Or just acknowledgment that he saw me.

We both said what we needed to and that there is no going back to pick up the pieces of the past. I watch him leave the lobby before heading up to my room, feeling lighter in heart but still missing the one person who centers me.

Riggs is crashed on the bed across from mine and I’m careful not to wake him while I undress and slide into my own bed.

My mind is stuck on the night and the messages waiting for me from my girl.

They all state the same things: she's proud of me, she misses me. She’ll come back tomorrow.

My heart pounds in my chest thinking about my girl and how far away she is from me.

I’ve become so used to sharing a bed, living together, having her next to me every night.

I’m worried about how she’ll handle the life when I’m traveling later on, but really, I’m almost more worried about how I’ll handle it.

I want her in every way imaginable, for everyone to know she’s mine.

ME: Fal, I need a favor.

My brother’s response is almost instant and I grin while watching him typing me back.

FALCON: It’s almost midnight. Didn’t you play football today?

ME: Jackass. You know you watched.

FALCON: I did. But only because my future sister-in-law coerced me into it over FaceTime.

ME: I love her, Fal.

FALCON: I’m pretty sure I’ve known that since you were sixteen.

ME: No, like really in love with her. She’s it. For life.

FALCON: Good for you man.

ME: I need you to make it public on my social media that she’s mine. I’m in a relationship.

FALCON: You realize what this will do right? Your page isn’t just a little blip on the football radar. Thanks to me, you’re heavily followed.

ME: Perfect. The more people who know, the better.

FALCON: Does she know this?

ME: She knows she’s mine and she loves me.

FALCON: Your funeral.

After his response, I know Falcon will follow through with what I’m asking. He may think its reckless, but if he’s willing to do it, then it won’t be that bad. I have faith in my brother. And I’m ready for the whole world to know I’m taken.