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Chapter Twenty-Five

TORIAN

P eople didn't react to my announcement like I'd expected. For the rest of the day, I felt like the center of attention. I knew Wilder and Hawke were getting the same thing, and the stares at dinner had been intense. That was fine. The smiles were what threw me.

I was supposed to be adapted to things here. I should've been used to Earth by now, but I really wasn't. Oh, the itch of iron being all around? Yeah, I barely even noticed that anymore. The secrecy, the strangeness of humans, and everything about this place? I had that part down.

The thing that kept throwing me off was the faelings.

Born of two worlds, some were so comfortable with ideas I could barely understand.

Democracy being one. Others, however, clung to our fae culture harder than even I did.

Then there was the simple fact that so many fae children were here, in one single place, figuring out how to socialize.

On Faerie, children were rare. Usually, that made us a bit of a spectacle. Complete strangers would gladly spoil us just to enjoy a moment in the presence of youthful joy. Rarely did a child ever meet another, unless it was well planned out and intentional.

My mother's war had changed all of that.

Now, children were hidden on Earth, often with parents risking their lives to make it possible.

Ivy Rhodes had corralled all of us together so we could learn what our often-dead parents couldn't teach us.

Living their youth among humans meant many of the students of Silver Oaks Institute didn't realize how impossible all of this should be.

They took it for granted, understood the social nuances, and thrived in their cliques of friends.

And sure, I knew how to operate among various social circles.

Nobility was notorious for those. The difference was I knew how to work with adults .

I'd learned how to defend against backstabbing - both the literal and the social kind.

I'd been trained to control and manipulate people automatically, assume the worst, and to always put myself first.

But now I had friends.

I worried about them, acted to protect them, and was doing my best to make their lives easier.

It was fucking hard, and as the day went on, I was pretty sure I'd fucked up somehow.

People in the halls dipped their heads at me with nervous respect, but Wilder kept getting friendly slaps on his shoulder.

Hawke seemed to be getting quite a few smiles.

The kind that made me think they were hoping to become friends, or at least friendly.

But the weight of what I'd done hit me as Keir and I headed back to my room after dinner.

Hawke and Wilder were hanging out in the dining hall until it emptied out a bit.

A good call, in my opinion. After the attack last night, Hawke should be fed more than usual.

Jevadu weren't known to let their prey escape, but Hawke was different.

He'd been raised among the sidhe. His mother had hidden him in plain sight, mingling with what humans would consider the merchant class. Her wealth and status had helped cover for Hawke's weirdness, making most think it was merely an eccentric family, not a monster child.

And he'd learned. My best friend had been so good at pretending to be sidhe that I hadn't immediately realized what he was.

When he'd jumped in to make sure I could survive the assholes I'd been fostered with?

I knew I owed him a life-debt. He'd asked for friendship instead, and it was the best thing I could imagine.

That was why I'd told the Children of the Exodus I was the prince. I wanted to make sure they knew he was a duke - and to respect him the way he deserved. Sadly, I hadn't anticipated how everyone else would react.

"Your Highness," a guy greeted me as he walked off the elevator when we waited to get on.

That was it. Nothing more than acknowledging my title, but I felt my guts clench.

When we reached our floor, Keir glanced over, but said nothing.

Together, the pair of us headed for our shared suite, but two steps before my door, a guy came running down the hall, clearly heading somewhere in a hurry.

"Evening, Prince Torian!" he called without slowing. The smile on his face was both friendly and excited.

And my pulse picked up. I was no longer just Torian.

I'd told the entire school I was the Summer Prince.

I'd let my secret out, revealing my relationship to the queen who'd chased us all here, and I didn't know how to handle that.

Oh, I tried to act as if I did, but they said it with such respect.

They looked at me without the resentment I knew how to handle.

Shoving magic at my door, I forced it open and ducked around the wood.

I needed the shield. My breath was coming faster now, and shallow.

My heart was hammering so hard I could hear it in my ears.

They kept calling me the prince! They knew my title.

They would expect things from me, and I didn't know how to handle that - not here!

"Tor?" Keir asked as he followed me in and gently closed my door.

"I made a mistake," I panted, struggling to calm myself.

"Hey, hey, hey..." Keir said, grabbing my shoulders. "It's ok, Tor."

"It's not!" I roared, shoving him back. "This wasn't how it was supposed to work!"

"You mean announcing you're the prince at the top of your lungs?" He looked incredulous.

And I flopped back against the wall. "They were supposed to hate me."

Keir nodded once, slowly. "Tor, they don't."

Fuck, I couldn't breathe. My thoughts were spinning, tossing memories of nobles bowing, students jeering, and my sister's hand on my wrist. It didn't make sense, but all those pieces got crammed together, and I was unable to stop the spiral.

They knew I was the prince. They knew who my mother was.

They could easily figure out who Aspen was.

Had I just made things harder for her? Why?

What the fuck had I been thinking when I'd done that?

Ms. Rhodes had warned me to keep this to myself, and instead, I'd screamed it to the entire dining hall.

"Tor!" Keir said, taking a step closer.

My knees buckled, leaving nothing but the wall holding me up, and I was slowly sinking down it. Would they try to attack my sister now? Would Rain be able to stop them? And worse, what the fuck did they expect me to do?

Were they hoping I'd bring the fae here under my mother's thumb? Was that why I was getting the smiles and polite greetings? Never mind that they knew I was the heir. They wanted me to be the heir. Why couldn't anyone see how wrong that was?

I'd been made by a compulsion. To me, that meant I was the child of rape.

My father hadn't wanted to bring me into this world.

As far as I knew, he hadn't been interested in my mother - and for good reason!

She'd forced him. That bitch had killed his entire court to make him impregnate her, and I was the result of all her evil.

"Tor," Keir breathed as he rushed in to catch me before I hit the ground. "Hey, isn't this when you're supposed to punch me?" And he eased me down, then tapped his cheek. "Right here. It'll feel good."

But I just shook my head, feeling stinging in my eyes. "I can't do this, Keir."

"Ah, there you are," he praised, cupping my cheek. "And you don't have to do it alone."

My gaze jumped between his beautiful eyes.

That blue was impressive. I wanted to call it indigo, but it wasn't quite that dark.

It also felt like a safe place. Like the sort of color that would wrap around me, shielding me from the shit I didn't want to handle - but which I had come here to tackle head-on.

"They like that I'm the heir," I breathed, holding his eyes desperately.

"Because you are a good guy, Tor," he soothed. "Believe it or not, you are."

"But they know I'm the prince!"

His thumb swept over my cheek. "Because you told them."

And that was when I realized he didn't get it. "No," I said, trying to sit up.

Keir just pushed my shoulder back down. "Talk, pretty boy. I'm not going anywhere, and I've already shielded the room so none of this will get out."

Fuck, how had I missed that? Never mind. I needed this, and the soft, intelligent, compassionate look in Keir's eyes made something inside me crack. The words tumbled out.

"They were supposed to hate me," I said again. "Keir, I said that so they'd fear me. So they'd stop attacking Winter users, thinking I'd be as cruel as my mother. Instead, they're thrilled. They smile when they use my title."

"I saw," he agreed.

"And they want me to be the heir!"

He shook his head quickly, making it clear he hadn't followed that jump. "Tor, why's that such a bad thing?"

"Because I'm a problem! " I spat. "Don't you fucking get it, Keir? I'm the heir to both crowns. I'm not just the fucking Summer Prince. I'm also the Winter one as well. I'm the thing that could destroy our magic forever!"

That was when Keir knelt, his knees hitting the floor before me as he leaned in. "You, Torian Hunt, are many things. One of them is good. A good man, a good friend, and a good ruler. That is why they're ok with this."

All I could do was shake my head. "But I could rip it all apart."

"How?" he asked.

"If they realize I'm Aspen's only heir, they'll kill her, Keir! They'll come at her harder. They were supposed to hate me so the Winter Queen could become a beacon of hope. Instead, they've embraced me, and that means she's at risk!"

"We'll keep her safe," he swore.

"And if I inherit the Winter Crown," I went on, "my mother gets the power.

My mother would rule everything. She'd be able to rip the gate open!

She could strip everyone but herself of magic.

That's the part you don't understand. With a crown comes responsibility, not privilege!

Those stupid hunks of jewels make it possible for us to grant more - and take away all of it. "

"Like you did with Nevaeh," he realized.

I nodded. "Yeah. And the only way for me to get the Summer Crown?"

"To kill your mom," he said, showing he knew that.

"But Aspen? She's not safe. They'll go for her.

They'll try to put her crown on my head, thinking it's the answer to all their problems, and no one here realizes how magic fucking works!

They think I'm a good thing, but I'm not.

I'm the worst. I'm the one fae who should never exist, and I'd planned - " I stopped hard.

Keir tilted my face, making me look at him. "Finish that."

I swallowed, but even after that, the words would only come out as a whisper. "I need to die."

"No."

"Keir!" I hissed.

"No," he said again, stronger this time. "That is not an option, Torian."

"It's the only option!" I roared, slapping his hand away. "Are you fucking stupid, Keir? Don't you get it? I'm a liability now. I'm a threat to Aspen's reign. I'm what's going to fuck this all up, and the only way to fix that?"

"You will not kill yourself," he growled, catching my arm just to shake me. "Fuck that! And even if you die, then what?"

"Then someone else will become Aspen's heir," I said. "Someone with Winter magic. Someone who has no ties to Summer. Someone who won't ruin all the magic on two worlds!"

"And we'll lose you," he said. "Aspen would stop fighting. Winter would be picked off, one by one. These 'Silent' fuckers would make sure of it. Rain would break because she's not ready yet." He paused, breathing hard enough to show he was pissed - or scared. "And I'd hate you."

"But you'd be safe," I countered.

"Fuck you, Torian. Fuck your arrogance and short-sightedness. Has it ever occurred to you that some of us care more about the petty things than crowns and thrones?"

"But the magic doesn't agree," I reminded him. "The magic is why I care. The magic is what allows the fae to live. Sidhe, Wild, and even Rain is probably hooked into it now. Without magic, we wither. Without magic, Keir, every single person here dies."

He rocked back in shock. He also didn't contradict me, pointing out the humans, but I had a feeling they wouldn't live long either.

My mother would find a way here and destroy them.

That was why I'd said everyone. For all I knew, even the completely mundane humans who didn't know about us would suffer as well.

Then Keir licked his lips. "No," he said again, but softer this time.

"You, of all people, can't take the easy way out.

Never mind that we need you to make this shit work.

We need to know what your mother taught you.

Torian, we fucking need you, and not just to use you.

Some of us need you because we like having you around, and losing you would break us. "

"Aspen would be fine."

"Hawke wouldn't," he shot back. "Wilder? Rain?" And he paused, searching my face. "Me?"

"You know I don't date guys," I grumbled.

"Haven't," he corrected. "That's also not what I'm talking about.

Believe it or not, Torian, I like your company.

You're my friend. A real friend. The kind that comes with bumps, bruises, and hiccups too.

The sort that will make up after you punch me in the face.

" He pulled in a breath. "The sort I've always wanted. "

The grip on my chest finally began to relax.

Keir thought of me as a friend? Not just a responsibility, a problem, or something to fuck when he got bored, but an actual friend?

The truth in his words rang clear, making it obvious he wasn't trying to talk around his truths either. No, he meant every word of that.

"But I don't know what to do," I whimpered, hating the quaver in my voice but unable to stop it. "I really fucked up this time, Keir."

"It's ok," he assured me. "I'll fix it, Tor, but I expect something in return, ok?"

"What?"

"Live?"

"Keir, if I have to choose between me and Aspen, I'll choose her every single time."

He nodded slowly, accepting that. "So choose both."

And my thoughts stilled. Both? I didn't know how to do that. "Find me a way, and I'll consider it," I told him, picking my words carefully.

He just rocked back on his heels and stood. "I can do that." Then he offered a hand to help me up.