Page 47

Chapter 47

Jessie

“Hey, Mom.”

“Just calling to check on you. Haven’t heard from you in a minute.”

I was at the studio on Sunday, looking over resumes from potential candidates to fill my old position and packing for the on-location shoot that week. Mom’s call gave me a chance to take a break.

I gave a small chuckle. “Yeah. Things have been busy.” What an understatement.

“Well, you’re the Hollywood star with the exciting life. Tell me what’s going on.”

“Um, I got a promotion! I’m head costume designer now.”

“Oh, how wonderful! I bet Mikey’s so proud of you. Did y’all go celebrate?”

My stomach dropped. “Oh, uh, he’s out of town. And he... kinda dumped me.”

“HEY! Get down off of there!”

“Huh?”

“Sorry, that damn cat’s back and trying to piss in my spring planters. I only just got ‘em out there. He dumped you? Why?”

I choked up a little. “I’m not sure.”

“Oh, Jessie. I’m sorry. Are y’all still living together?”

“He’s on the road now, but I packed my stuff to go.”

“Bless your heart, honey. That’s too bad. It’s his loss, you know.”

I really didn’t feel like discussing it anymore. “How’s Dad?”

“Oh, you know. Out getting ready for turkey season. I’m just a turkey hunter’s widow.”

My mother’s dramatic streak was somehow comforting. My life was chaotic and stressful, but her biggest worry was the same worry she had every spring: being alone now and then while Dad hunted. I told her I needed to get back to work and that I’d call her later, truly needing to get back to it.

I combed the list of characters and scenes to make sure I had every single piece for each character. I was on my own. I had to get it right.

Rain pelted the wardrobe trailer. I’d gotten so used to not checking the weather in L.A. that I was shocked to walk outside to rain that morning. The barista at the coffee shop informed me that it was one of the spring storms coming in. I did my best to keep my AirPods in and not think about whether the storm was getting worse.

I was working a Sunday partially because I had to, and partially so I didn’t have to deal with whether or not to watch Mikey’s game. I’d spent Saturday finishing his suit and packing my stuff up at his place. Kitty had offered for me to stay there until I could find a place, and her place was closer to work than Mikey’s.

I’d originally planned to stitch “Sweet Cheeks” or “Jockey” into the suit cuff, but it seemed too silly to do that under the circumstances.

Part of me felt stupid for being that heartbroken. We hadn’t even been together that long. But we’d shared a lot, and not just physically. I felt really connected to him. Maybe it had just been a long time since I fell in love, not that he himself was that great.

But he was kinda great. He went out of his way to take care of me. He was so big and brawny and tough but so sugar-sweet underneath it all.

And wounded. I suspected the wounds were what made him break up with me, but I couldn’t know since he left no explanation. “Find your relationship guy.”

And yet, I woke up to a message from him in New York. “I miss you.”

Maybe he was coming back around. But he couldn’t just shut me out when stuff got hard. If he really wanted me, he had to get vulnerable. I knew deep down that this was injured child Mikey and not grown-up Ben, but I can’t force a man to grow up. That’s something he’s got to do on his own.

I went from what I thought was a stable relationship to being cheated on, to a complete whirlwind romance where it felt like I was on a game show with the floor bottomed out. Floating on air, swept up in Ben with no grounding.

That lack of grounding came back to bite us. I needed to know how to be independent. I couldn’t afford to screw up this time in my career either.

I had enough money at that point, between my new salary and a bonus they offered me to get me through the transition. I could easily put down money on a new apartment. I planned to look for my own place as soon as I got my replacement hired.

It was 7 p.m. by the time I felt confident that everything was coordinated for the week. I had emails out to a handful of candidates to fill the vacant position. I could head back to Kitty’s for the night and be out early the next morning.

But right when I had my mind made up and everything tucked into its neat, uncomplicated mental box, I walked outside into a thunderstorm.