Page 41

Chapter 41

Mikey

When I checked my phone after the game, I had my usual post-game string of texts from Jessie. Except, these weren’t entirely typical.

Jessie Girl

Git him! Smack him!

I laughed at that one. The thought of “smacking” someone in hockey was a fun idea. There was a picture of her looking genuinely happy in my jersey, holding Sorrento’s baby and smiling with some of the other wives. I didn’t expect to feel some kind of way about her holding a baby, but she looked like a natural. We hadn’t talked about kids. I hadn’t even thought about wanting kids until I met her, because it didn’t even seem like a possibility. I didn’t hate the idea.

Nice goal. You look hot

But the next text froze my blood.

Why didn’t you tell me about Sydney

Ohhhhh, fuck. So much for her blending in with the wives.

As I was reading through the messages, Leroy approached me.

“Hey, Mike,” he snapped. “Tell your stupid girlfriend to stay the fuck away from my wife.”

I turned to face him. “Excuse me?”

“Your little bimbo got Sydney kicked out of the wives’ party.”

Stelle was already rushing to get behind me, sensing the mayhem in the air. “Hey!” he warned.

“What did you call her?”

“And while you’re at it, you stay the fuck away from my wife.”

I laughed. “You’re deranged if you think I want anything to do with her. She’s all yours, bro.”

“Oh, I’m deranged, asshole?” His voice boomed. Guys gathered in various states of dress. It was about to go down. “It’s your little whore who bullied Sydney and made her feel bad about fucking you.”

“That’s not what I heard,” Romelski said, shaking his phone as if to prove he had receipts from his wife.

“Did you call Jessie a whore?” I shouted, stepping to bump my chest with Leroy’s.

And then the wrestling match began. In seconds, Leroy and I were battling on the locker room floor. I had him pinned under me, pummeling his cheekbone, when Coach demanded Sorrento and Stelle pull me off him.

“Both of you, in the office, NOW.”

We sat in two chairs across from the desk, not looking at each other.

“One of you had better start talking. We can’t have this bullshit right before the playoffs.”

“I haven’t talked to my girlfriend yet, but it seems Leroy’s wife harassed her at the party back home.”

“Sydney wouldn’t hurt a fly,” Leroy exclaimed. “It was your scrappy little bitch.”

I stood, ready to pound his face again, but Coach pulled me down.

“Leroy, quit being a dick. Mikey, settle down. Whatever this is, it ends right this second. You don’t have to like each other, but you have to have each other’s backs out there. Out there, we are one big happy fucking family. Got it? I don’t want to hear another goddamn thing about your wives fighting.”

“She’s my girlfriend,” I corrected in a mumble. Coach glared at me and I raised my hands. “You’re right.”

Things were tense as I got changed in the locker room and got on the bus. I texted Jessie as soon as I got out of the meeting.

I’ll call you as soon as I’m back in my room, honey. I’m sorry.

I felt like I was riding to my funeral on the bus back to the hotel. Instead of grabbing food with the guys, I went straight to my room. I could order room service later. Jessie needed to come first. My throat was dry as I dialed her number.

Jessie’s voice was tearful. “Hello?”

Already off to a bad start. Not her usual “hey, Jockey,” or “what’s my favorite thug doing?”

“Hi, Sweet Cheeks. You wanna tell me what happened?”

She sniffed. “Everything’s awful.”

“I’m so sorry, babe. Some of the guys caught me up, but I want to hear it from you.”

“Seems like you should tell me. I’m apparently the last to know that you fucked your teammate’s wife.”

I sucked in a breath through my nose. “It was a long time ago, Jess. Before they were together. I was really young. She wanted more with me, and when I said no, she moved on to him.”

“She said... some awful stuff. In front of everybody. About me. About you,” Jess sobbed.

“Aw, honey. I’m so sorry. She doesn’t mean anything to me. Nothing. You’re so important to me.”

“Why didn’t you at least warn me? I got completely blindsided. How many other women are lurking, just waiting to remind me how much I don’t belong with you?”

There was the knife in the gut. The reminder that Jessie was a relationship girl, and my fuckaround ways were only ever going to hurt her.

“I don’t know, hon.”

The line was quiet, punctuated by her sniffles.

“Jessie, if I could undo it all and have met you first, I would. But that’s not how life works.”

“I know that. And I don’t blame you for being who you are, but... you do want me, right? Just me? I’m not stale?”

“Of course, I do, honey. Just you. And I said that stale thing before I had you. Before I knew how good this could be.”

She gave a little cry. “Things aren’t so good right now, though.”

I scrubbed my hand over my face. Even I felt like crying. A gnawing feeling chased me that I wasn’t good enough for her. But the only reason I was feeling that way in the moment was because of Sydney fucking Leroy. But I couldn’t let Leroy’s mean-ass wife ruin my relationship. “I’m not going anywhere, Jess. I’m in this. Okay?”

“Okay.”

“But I can’t guarantee no one else is going to pop up and try to make you feel like shit because they’re jealous.”

“Yeah. I get it.” She didn’t say anything for a minute. “She said she was the best you ever had.”

I chuckled. “That’s rude. And untrue. Because I hadn’t had you.”

“She acted like I can’t have my job and be your girlfriend.”

“Don’t listen to her, honey. You belong there. You’re mine, remember? But if you don’t want to go to that stuff, you don’t have to do it for me.”

“You said it made you happy that I was going,” she objected.

“Well, I don’t want you to go if you’re just going to get bullied, Jess. That doesn’t make me happy at all,” I said. “You’re enough for me, okay? You do know that, right? I’m so proud of you all the time, Jessie.”

“Thanks, Ben.”

“I’m really sorry that my past keeps fucking with you, Jess. I hate it.”

“She said,” Jessie said, sucking some snot, “that you got bored easily and you were probably cheating on me. And that you were only dating me because it made you look good.”

“Jessie, you know that’s not true.” I wanted to tell her that I loved her right then, but I really didn’t want to tell her because of something bad happening. I wanted it to be joyful. “I’m dating you because I really, really like you. I’m crazy about you. And I could never cheat on you, honey. Never.”

“Okay,” she said, seemingly steeling herself. “No other team wives, right?”

I hated that she even had to ask that. Sydney had made it seem like Jessie wasn’t good enough for me, but in reality, I wasn’t good enough for her. She deserved better than me. “No other team wives. Feel better, Sweet Cheeks?”

She coughed. “That’s not all. I ran into Cole. He threatened to have you thrown in jail if I didn’t tell him where the shrimp was.”

I really thought I’d hit my peak of feeling bad, but I suddenly felt worse. Not only had my former promiscuous ways come back to bite us, but my little crime added to her hard day. The gnawing feelings I’d been fighting broke through. How could I keep putting Jessie through misery?

“I’m sorry, Ben. I told him. I didn’t know what else to do.”

“Oh, honey, don’t blame yourself for that. It’s not a big deal. I didn’t mean to put you in a bad position. I was trying to get back at him, but yeah. It’s pretty illegal what I did.”

“Okay.”

“I feel like it’s my fault you had a bad day, Jess. I feel terrible.”

“It’s fine.”

She said that, but I knew it wasn’t fine. I was ruining Jess’s life. She was going through a tough time anyway: bad stuff at work, bad stuff at home, her limited free time being taken up by people from my life being rude to her. Everything was my fault. Everything I touched turned to shit—the opposite of the Midas touch.

We were both quiet.

“I just really don’t want to see Cole anymore, Ben. I might have to move.”

Panic washed over me. “I hear you, baby. Can you wait until I get home and we can figure something out together?”

“It’s a little early for us to be fully moving together, don’t you think?” she asked.

“Well, yeah, but... we already do live together,” I said. “And I don’t want to stop.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, babe. I like living with you.”

She gave a little whine. “I miss you, Benny.”

“I miss you, too, hon. I’m real sorry about today. I wish I could hold you.”

“Me, too.”

“I can’t wait to get home to you. Kiss for Daddy?”

“Yeah,” she said with a sad chuckle. “Kiss for Daddy.”