Page 33

Chapter 33

Jessie

Ben handled me with a new tenderness after our beach date. Thus far, our sex had consisted of a lot of chatter and urgency. But after the beach, Ben took me home and took it slow.

He held my hand in the car all the way home, drawing it to his lips for kisses every so often. His amber eyes shone with hope, and promise, and honor. When we got to our apartment, we took our shoes off at the door.

“What time do you have to be at the arena?”

“Around four.”

I glanced at my watch, a thin vintage metal piece I’d found at a shop in Encino. “Don’t you need your nap?”

He stepped toward me, cupping my cheeks in his hands. “No.” His lips met mine, soft and deferential. “I need you.”

He’d been sweet all afternoon, but this made my stomach jump. “Me?”

“You, Jessalyn. It’s hard for me to say everything I’m feeling right now, because it’s all so big. You make me feel so much, and I just want to show you. I want my body to be yours for a little while.”

My eyes jumped between his, completely caught by his admission.

“That okay?”

I grinned up at him. “Very okay.”

“Come on, gorgeous.” Mikey took my hand and brought me into his room, closing the door behind us. “I’ll eat you on the kitchen counter another time. He doesn’t get to hear this. The way I make you feel is all for me. He missed out on you, and I’m not sharing a single scrap.”

I wrinkled my nose. “Let’s not talk about him.”

Mikey cursed himself. “My big mouth again. I really am trying to talk less.”

“Your big mouth is part of you, though. And I’m into you.”

“I’m beyond into you, Jessalyn,” he said, pulling me into the bathroom. “My every hope and dream is wrapped up in you. I look at you and see things I wanted but never thought I could have. I see myself becoming a better man because I want to be that for you.”

He shoved my leggings down and hoisted me up on the bathroom counter between the two sinks. As he peeled my leggings off my feet, he continued talking. “I see you by my side for all the events I have to go to. I see you getting to know my ridiculous friends. I see your snuggles after I get home from a road trip.”

He shucked my shirt off and followed with his own, kissing the space where my neck meets my shoulder. “I see me driving you to work when you’re tired, and bringing you coffee. Summers off together where I can take you to Italy or Japan or wherever the hell you want to go. Fucking Disneyland if that’s what you like, and I’ll ride those stupid teacups with you all fucking day just to see you smile. I see myself facing my fears so I can be enough for you.”

I pulled back and grinned at him. “You said you couldn’t put it into words. Seems like you found a way.”

He chuckled self-consciously. “You know me. Can’t stop talking.”

I pulled our foreheads together and held his cheeks. “Promise me something.”

“What?”

“Never stop talking. Not when you’re going to be like this. You’re perfect, Ben.”

He assaulted me with an overjoyed kiss, a whimper escaping him as he cradled my face and waist. “No one’s ever called me that in my whole life, Jessie.”

“That’s their loss.”

Ben locked our bodies together, binding me in his arms and holding the nape of my neck with an unprecedented tenderness. His kisses were full of fire, like he’d never quench his thirst for me. He kept a hand at my neck as the other explored under my bra, down my side, up my thigh.

“I don’t know how to make you feel all the things I feel for you, Jessie.”

“Just keep going,” I said, scraping my hands over the planes of his back and grabbing a fistful of his rock-hard ass. His kisses traveled down my body as he pushed my underwear aside, rubbing gently over my clit.

“I need you to feel how much I need you.” His brows knit in desperation as he sank to his knees. “How much I’m helpless for you. You have all of me tied up in you, Jessalyn.”

How was he so poetic, so vulnerable with me? How was I falling in love again? It was easy. He gave me everything. He was fearless in that moment. He bared himself to me in every way.

He pulled my legs gently to scoot my ass to the edge of the counter, sinking his tongue into me.

“I’m at your mercy, Jessie. I won’t be happy until I give you every single thing you deserve, and even then, it’ll never be enough,” he said, diving back in to devour me. He was eating me out, but it was so much more than sex or physicality. This was spiritual. “For now, give me your body. I want every moan and every pulse to be mine.”

“Christ, Mikey,” I managed, on the verge of tears. “It’s yours. I want you to have it.”

After a long suck, he said, “Say it again.”

“It’s yours, Ben. I’m yours.”

He rewarded me with the frenetic pace of his tongue, and I pushed my hips into his face, grabbing hold of his hair. The bathroom counter bit into my ass, only held up by it and his strength. The pinch of pain and the intense pleasure of his mouth melded together until I was dancing at the edge of heaven. Ben’s thick fingers slid inside me, and he looked up with a salacious grin. Where I would have been scared to move Cole where I wanted him, I knew Ben could take it. I fisted his hair and showed him where I needed him.

Ben raised his eyebrows at me as he sent his tongue over my clit again and again. I thrust against his face, his tortured groan sounding. And there I was, coming in my new boyfriend’s face on the bathroom counter. I hit my head on the wall behind me as I slumped back, Ben giving me a concerned yet amused look. He stood to kiss me, pulling me forward.

“That okay for you, Jessie?” He smiled between kisses.

“Yep. Real okay.”

He laughed, a delicate, shy kind of laugh.

“Okay if I haul you over to our bed and get inside you?”

“More than okay.”

Ben lay me down on our bed, crawling on top of me to kiss me deeply. I reached for him between my legs, letting him press into me without interrupting our torrent of kisses. He pulled back and looked down at me as he pushed in the final inch, eyes rounded.

“Jessie, I,” he started, “I feel like I... you’re just so perfect. I don’t know how I’ve been without you my whole life.”

Yeah, we were in the middle of having sex, but Mikey was feeling something big. I was, too. But I couldn’t tell him that kind of thing while we were having sex, and I didn’t want him to confuse sex with love. But it did feel right in the moment.

“I know,” was all I could manage. He planted his face in my neck, curling into me slow, deep, and hard. “I need you, Ben.”

“Not near as bad as I need you.”

His hands slipped under my back as he raised us upright, scooting to sit on the edge of the bed with me facing him in his lap. Admiration flowed between us as I rode him, his hands exploring every inch of my skin. Most men I’d been with just stared at my tits in that position, but Ben watched me. My face. My eyes. It got so intense that I felt like I might cry, the gravity of what passed between us overwhelming me. We were falling, hard. And while I wanted it, and felt the same way, I wasn’t ready to be so serious.

I pressed his face into my breasts, guiding a nipple to his mouth. He closed his eyes reverently as he sucked, then moved to the other breast. He moaned out my name as he dropped kisses all over my breasts, my chest, and my collarbones.

“Please never leave me,” he blurted out, then got a distant look as his brain left the present.

“Daddy,” I begged, bringing him out of his head. Ben snapped back into action.

“I got you, baby. Just hold still.” He gripped my hips and thrust up into me. His name tumbled off my lips and I pushed him back on the bed. He rolled us so he was on top again, surrounding me with his embrace.

“Ben, I need everything.” I didn’t even know what that meant, but I knew that I needed to feel like we were one, not just our bodies joining, but every single part of ourselves.

“It’s all yours, Jessalyn,” he managed before he shouted a curse word and lost it inside me. I twitched my hips, trying to meet him there, but I still had a little bit to go before I could come.

Ben breathed heavily into my hair, kissing under my ear. “You didn’t go, did you?”

“No, but it’s no big deal.”

He pulled back to look at me, smoothing his hand over my hair and bringing our foreheads together. “You know that’s not how it works with me, Jessie Girl. What does Daddy do for you?”

I blushed.

“Come on, baby. What do I do for you?”

“Take care of me,” I said with a grin.

“That’s right. What can I do to help you get there right now?”

My blush deepened. “Jessie, don’t hide. You need my fingers?”

I struggled to meet his eyes. “Really, I’m good.”

Ben played with my bangs. “Are you good, or are you afraid to ask for what you need?”

“I...”

“Do you need a toy? Butt stuff? Me to lick your feet? Eat you out? You know I’m good with anything.”

“Fine! Get a toy.”