Page 62 of Perfect Happiness

Jiyoo got out of bed and went over to the window.

Using her palm, she wiped one corner of the frosted window and made a small window within a window.

She peered out the hole and looked down at the front gate.

Someone was leaving the front yard with the wheelbarrow.

Someone dressed in a black raincoat and rain hat, someone with whom Jiyoo had made eye contact that one night, someone whom Jiyoo didn’t want to believe was Mother.

Jiyoo jumped back from the window, but she was already a moment too late.

She had seen something she shouldn’t have.

She wanted to convince herself that she had seen nothing, but she couldn’t fool herself.

She had immediately recognized the two long objects hanging over the side of the wheelbarrow.

They were the legs of a person wearing white sneakers.

Jiyoo heard the front gate close. She went back to the window and peered out again.

They were all gone—the black raincoat, the wheelbarrow, the white sneakers.

All she could see was a white light floating down the footpath.

The light soon entered the wetlands, which were engulfed in a flurry of snow.

The loon in the attic stopped whispering. Now that it knew Mother was gone, it was wailing. The loon also went from scratching the wall to pounding on it. Thud, thud, thud . . .

Jiyoo could feel the strength in her legs draining. Her knees gave out as she collapsed in front of the windowsill. Something was crawling out of the dream she had almost forgotten. She could see two legs with white sneakers on their feet ticking like the hands of a clock.

The call of the loon turned into Father’s voice. She stuck her head between her knees and covered her ears with both hands, but Father’s voice assaulted her ears like a powerful cannon.

Finally, the dream hiding in the thicket jumped out of the bushes.

Jiyoo didn’t remember when she had fallen asleep that night. Actually, she couldn’t even be certain that she ever fell asleep. All she remembered was that at some point, she started to hear the call of a loon.

At first, she thought it was coming from the Half Moon Marsh.

It didn’t bother her or hurt her ears. After all, she had come to the cabin before and was used to the loons.

But as the call got louder and closer, she realized something was off.

She realized the call wasn’t coming from the wetlands.

It sounded like it was coming from the attic.

Jiyoo sat with her feet hanging over the bed.

It didn’t occur to her that she should call Mother.

Nor did it occur to her that she should wake up Father.

At that moment, she wasn’t thinking anything.

She simply opened the bedroom door and went out into the hallway, as though she were possessed by something.

When she flipped the switch, electricity entered the candle bulb on the wall.

The light was just bright enough for her to find the dresser in the hallway.

Jiyoo found the key and unlocked the door to the attic.

It didn’t occur to her that she should be afraid.

If anything, she thought she might be dreaming.

There was nothing in the attic. From her bedroom, it sounded like the loon was in the attic, but now that she was here, it sounded like the loon was downstairs.

Jiyoo went back into the hallway and locked the door behind her.

She returned the key to where she had found it.

And again, with barely any hesitation, she started down the stairs.

The loon’s call was getting stranger and stranger.

One moment it sounded like someone screaming, the next it sounded like someone crying, and sometimes it sounded like angry shouting.

Once she turned at the landing, everything became dark.

The stairs bent at the landing, cutting her off from the light upstairs.

All the lights downstairs were off. Only then did Jiyoo feel afraid.

She thought something might jump out from the darkness and grab her ankles.

And she was afraid that if she called out to Mother in the darkness, she would trip and fall.

But even so, Jiyoo didn’t turn back. She continued downstairs, like a child bewitched by a magical flute.

She would feel each step with her toes before moving forward.

When she finally arrived in the kitchen, a shriek exploded from the darkness.

The sound was so loud and sudden that Jiyoo almost shrieked herself.

The sound had come from Mother, from the bathroom.

Jiyoo had no time to think, no time to turn on the lights. Something was happening to Mother. Something terrible, something that Jiyoo needed to stop. That was why Jiyoo ran to the bathroom and opened the door without knocking.

At first, Jiyoo didn’t know what she was looking at. She felt like she was looking at a strange picture book.

Blood on the bathtub and wall. Mother standing next to the tub and looking back at Jiyoo. The cleaver in her hand. The blood splattered on her face. Two legs dangling over the side of the tub. A single twitching toe.

The moment each of these objects combined into one picture, something inside Jiyoo’s mind broke. Darkness immediately enveloped her eyes. She had no memories of what happened after that. Except for the scream she let out before everything went black.

When Jiyoo opened her eyes, she was lying in bed. A dim light was on, and Mother was standing next to the bed. There was concern on her face.

“Jiyoo, are you okay?”

Jiyoo glanced around. She was in her room.

“I came upstairs because I heard you scream. Was there a monster in your dream?”

Mother was wearing a blue bathrobe. Her hair was drying in a blue towel.

Nowhere was there anything that looked like bloodstains.

A smile twinkled in her eyes, two locks of hair were plastered to her wet forehead, and her cheeks looked moist and clear.

She looked like she had just come running out of the bathtub.

Jiyoo let out a whimper-like sigh. It was just a dream.

“Are you feeling okay?” Mother asked.

The images of the bathroom appeared in Jiyoo’s mind again.

“No,” Jiyoo said as she shook her head and rid her mind of the images. “It’s nothing. I just—”

“Good,” Mother said with a nod. “It’s okay. It was just a dream. It’ll all disappear when you wake up in the morning.”

“Shall I stay here until you fall asleep?” Mother asked in a concerned tone.

“No.”

Jiyoo had never fallen asleep while being watched by Mother. At least, not as far as she remembered. She thought it would actually be harder to fall asleep if Mother was watching over her.

“Good. Then I’ll go back to finish my bath.”

Mother turned off the lights and went out of the room. She left behind a damp, fishy smell.

Mother was right. Jiyoo thought she was dreaming that same dream, but she wasn’t.

The dream always ended at the bottom of the stairs.

And that was because Mother’s voice always stopped her before she got to the bathroom.

Because of this, she had forgotten all about the bare foot dangling over the side of the bathtub.

At least until she saw the legs with white sneakers dangling from the wheelbarrow.

Jiyoo wondered if the white sneakers were also a dream. If they were, then the loon in the attic had to be a dream, too.

Yes. It was a dream. The kind of dream that Dad Puppet protected her from, the kind of dream that disappeared as soon as she woke up.

Jiyoo lifted herself off the floor. Immediately she looked out the window again.

The light was motionless in the middle of the footpath.

Although the snow was obscuring the light, she could see it clearly enough.

But isn’t that strange? Mischievous Mouse asked. I don’t remember you falling asleep tonight. But don’t you have to fall asleep to dream?

Jiyoo searched her memory. Had she fallen asleep without being aware of it?

Sometimes, when she lay in bed with her eyes closed, it felt like she was both asleep and not asleep.

That night was like that, and so was tonight.

According to the doctor, this happened when Jiyoo was only in a light sleep.

Jiyoo regretted not asking the doctor if she could dream while only in a light sleep.

Just do something to test if you’re dreaming or not. Mischievous Mouse said. Mother’s not home right now.

Jiyoo turned her head and looked at the wall behind the bed. The pounding and the crying were only getting louder.

Doesn’t it seem like it knows Mother is gone? Doesn’t it seem like it’s asking you to hurry?

Mischievous Mouse asked the question, then answered it.

It might be a person, not a loon.

No. Jiyoo shook her head. Who would be here but Mother and Stepfather? It could be a thief. But a thief wouldn’t try to send Jiyoo a message. They would take what they wanted and run away as fast as possible.

Go over to the bed.

The good daughter inside Jiyoo, whom Mischievous Mouse hated, reminded Jiyoo of the promise she made to Mother.

She told Jiyoo to jump in bed and go to sleep.

She warned Jiyoo that if she broke her promise to Mother again, she would never be forgiven.

She showed Jiyoo an image of her dragging her suitcase through the doors of an orphanage.

Jiyoo went over to the bed and sat down. The sounds beyond the wall continued. It was now banging on the wall in counts of three. Thud, thud, thud ... thud, thud, thud .

I have an idea , Mischievous Mouse said as it appeared again.

Say something to the wall. If it’s a loon or if this is a dream, you won’t get a reply.

If it is a real person, then you will get an answer.

Nothing will happen if you talk to the wall.

You won’t be leaving the room. You won’t be breaking your promise to Mother.