A lot of people claimed it, but Arn was thus far the only person Mull had ever met who literally didn’t care about anyone else’s feelings or what anyone else thought.

Like those cutaways in reality shows where the person tells the camera what they really think, but Arn lived every day like that.

He just floated through life, being Arn.

If life were one of Cory’s beloved TV sitcoms, then Arn would be Eddie Haskell, vacillating between being an insincere sycophant and a smiling conman, stealing everyone blind.

And people accepted it. Because that’s who he’d always been.

Hell, people liked him. He could be very charming when he wanted to be and more than a few people on the team suspected that was one of his lesser known powers.

Most people trusted him, despite themselves.

Like he could somehow make you trust him.

But it didn’t mean you couldn’t still be confused by his presence in your life.

Not in an angry way, just in the way that made you think twice about ever introducing Arn to any of your other friends.

Arn was unreliable, irresponsible, and untrustworthy. But he was slick as Tom Sawyer, forever getting those around him to whitewash his proverbial fences for him. No one ever got the best of Arn. Not once.

Still, Mull had absolutely no idea what he was doing here.

“I don’t understand why Oz invited you here.” Mull thought aloud. “Are you really the best person to take a bullet for me?”

“Nope.” Arn agreed immediately. “I might steal bullets from you, but certainly not take one for you.”

“Then why are you here?” She pressed.

“You’re part of the Undercover Department.” He reminded her. “The Undercover Department isn’t really so much about the loyalty, but we have a reputation to preserve. And no one fucks with us.”

“Uh-huh.” Mull barely restrained from rolling her eyes. “What’s the real reason?”

“Cut him some slack, at least he’s here.” Holly defended. “We know worse people than him.”

“I don’t know if you know this or not,” Mull pointed at him, “but Arn doesn’t give two shits about us.”

“Nope.” Arn agreed again, admitting the point without argument.

“He’s just here because we pay him and let him do evil shit.”

“Yep.”

“His real super-power is the ability to lie without remorse.” Mull continued.

“The clinical term is ‘pseudologia fantastica.’” Arn corrected, sounding like an authority on the issue. “I’m in treatment though.”

“No, you’re not.” Mull deadpanned.

“No, I’m not.” Arn agreed good-naturedly. “Mainly I just use it to entertain myself and hit on women.”

Mull made a face. “I don’t think ‘Arnold Benedix’ is even his real name.”

“Nope.” Arn laughed at the absurdity of the idea that he’d tell his friends his actual name. “Not even close.”

“He’s a liar.”

“You say ‘liar,’ I say ‘ imaginative .’”

“And if one day he gets bored or someone else offers him more, he’d sell us all out in a heartbeat.”

“But I’d feel bad about it.” Arn assured them, still focused on Cory’s teen soap opera.

“No, you wouldn’t.” Mull deadpanned again.

“Not really, no.” Arn agreed, shaking his head.

Mull pointed at him again. “He doesn’t even care enough to lie.”

“I believe that honesty is important if there’s any hope of trust being built.”

“This is just another job to him.” Mull made a face.

“Actually, I also have no work ethic.” Arn corrected. “I don’t want a job .” He sounded vaguely disgusted by that insinuation. “I’m just here because stealing from you is easier if we’re on the same team.”

She had no reply to that. It was brutally honest. And… Holly did have a point. Arn might be an asshole, but he was generally a benign one. She didn’t have a real issue with the man, she was just confused as to why he, of all people, was on her protective detail.

Mull slouched down into her uncomfortable chair, watching the terribly cheesy teen drama on the screen.

A moment later, the front door swung open and Oz stalked in. “Did Natalie call?” He demanded from the doorway.

“Uh-oh, Dad’s home.” Holly called to everyone sarcastically. “Look busy.”

Although it was a joke, there genuinely was that sense whenever Oz was around.

Oswald Dimico was the adult in the room. Always.

“Did any of you even do anything today!?!” He snapped, sounding more irritated than she’d ever heard.

“You seriously have nothing else you could be doing to help her, than sitting around my fucking apartment and…!” He trailed off, as Mull sat up straighter and he saw her over the top of the chair.

“Ah.” He cleared his throat and straightened his suit, although it was always perfectly orderly.

“Good.” He stood awkwardly there for a moment, looking relieved and like he wanted to say something, but ultimately just walked towards his bedroom.

“You shouldn’t leave unless someone goes with you.

It’s not safe.” He advised seriously, stepping over the prone form of his unconscious doorman without comment, most likely because he was long used to the Consortium members inexplicably beating people up, then frowned slightly at seeing the TV. “Why…” He began.

“I bought you a TV.” She explained. “I used the store’s Black Friday discount code. ”

“Okay.” He nodded, processing that. “Why?”

“Because it made it 40% off. It really makes no sense to have to wait until…”

“No, I mean why buy a TV at all?” He interrupted.

“You needed one.”

“Why does anyone ‘need’ a TV?”

“To watch shit?” She guessed. “I don’t know.”

“So, you left the apartment, risking your life, so that you could watch… television programs?” He started from the room again. “That doesn’t sound especially smart.”

When he said it that way, it did sound kinda stupid.

Huh.

Mull started after him. “I’m sorry I do a piss-poor job of hiding, Oz. I’m not used to it.” She didn’t let the bedroom door stop her at all, following right after him. “That’s Natalie’s thing. I don’t hide.”

He smiled and shook his head in amused irritation. “You are Natalie!” He reminded her in exasperation.

Mull scoffed. “Only sometimes. And even then, not really.”

He made a humoring sound. “I’m in no position to tell anyone what to do about their mental health, obviously, but I would suggest that you acknowledge that Natalie and ‘you’ at least share common interests.”

“She does her thing and I do mine.”

“We’ve had this discussion before.” He reminded her.

“I don’t agree with your take on it, I think you always try to have it both ways, but you know more about your own life than I do.

” He paused. “Or you’re supposed to, anyway.

Frankly, I think you make terrible, terrible decisions sometimes.

” He pointed towards the door. “You just go waltzing out there, God knows where, while there are innumerable psychopaths looking for you!?!”

“It’s perfectly safe.”

“Safe? Last year, there were 190 unsolved murders in this city.”

“Yeah, but I’m probably responsible for 20% of them, easy, so I like my odds.”

He didn’t look convinced, continuing to glare at her.

She stared at him expressionlessly for a moment. “Oz, I’m not afraid of them.”

He looked down at the floor, then his eyes snapped back to hers. “What about Natalie?”

She scoffed. “Natalie’s afraid of everything. ”

“No, no,” Oz shook his head, “that’s not what I meant. I mean: why are you afraid of Natalie?”

Mull snorted at the idea. “I’m not afraid of Natalie. That’s…” She shifted on her feet. “That’s insane. No one is afraid of Natalie. She’s a loser.”

“I’m not telling you how to live your life.” He stood straighter. “But I know that mine is made better by having you in it, so please be more careful with it. And one of these days, you really need to decide where ‘you’ stop and ‘Natalie’ begins.”

“How about you, Oz? If I’m so desperately needed in your life, why do you look disgusted every time I’m within ten feet of you!?!”

“Oh, I do not!”

“Yes, you do!”

“We’ve talked about that.” He still didn’t look convinced. “I have some problems, but I can assure you, they…”

“Yeah, yeah…” she rolled her eyes, “’they don’t concern me at all,’ I heard that already.” Her jaw tightened. “But it kinda feels like it’s fucking personal sometimes, Oz.”

“Well, apparently, you don’t even exist. I spent years being your friend, only to learn that you were someone entirely different, and according to you, the person I thought I knew was just make-believe.” He held out his hands. “Kinda feels personal too, Nat.”

“The whole reason I agreed to stay here with you, was so that I could keep YOU safe, you ignorant jackass!” She gestured to herself.

“ Because you’re my fucking friend! No matter who I am or what I do, you’re the one goddamn constant!

If anything happened to you, because I got you involved in this…

” She trailed off. “I’m not the person you’re looking for, Oz.

” She whispered. “Not anymore. She was here last Monday and she might be back tomorrow, but she’s not me.

Today, I’m a woman neither of us has ever met before.

I could be anyone today. I could hurt you today, I don’t know.

” She made a tired, helpless sound. “And because I can’t even be sure of how I’m going to react to something, my advice would be to keep your distance from me. ”

Oz stalked forward, casually ripping off one of his impeccable white gloves and absently tossing it aside, then used his other hand to raise her arm and clasped her hand to his.

His eyes burned into hers, determined. “ You are the woman I’m looking for. Today. Tomorrow. The indefinite future.”

Their fingers intertwined, both of them breathing hard.