Mull wasn’t sure what to make of that. Jungle Lass had some crazy ideas about animals and natural desires, but Mull had stopped listening to that psycho.

If it were up to Jungle Lass, they’d be eating raw meat and having sweaty sex by a bonfire somewhere, while mastodons wandered by.

Which was an idea that Mull seemed more bothered by than Natalie, which was also very, very odd.

Natalie almost never agreed with her other persona on a given day, but in this case, she and Jungle Lass were completely on the same page. She seemed…

Without warning, the door to the apartment opened and a young man with dark hair appeared in the entry, looking surprised to find people standing on his doorstep.

His eyes cut up and down Mull’s minimal wardrobe, staying pinned on her breasts.

“ Please tell me you’re here to see me.” He said simply.

Oz moved forward. “Can we come in, Vadik?”

The man immediately stepped aside. “As long as you’re with her, you can fucking move in , mister.” His eyes stayed on Mull as she walked into the room to stand beside Oz. “Are you with the CIA or something?” He asked her seriously.

“Yes, I’m with the CIA.” She deadpanned. “We all dress this way, it’s policy. Langley is designed to look like Tarzan’s Treehouse, for security.”

“Really?”

Mull rolled her eyes. “You’re a fucking moron, you’re forbidden from talking. ”

“We’re with the Consortium of Chaos.” Oz informed the man.

“You’re heroes?” Vadik asked.

Mull shrugged. “More or less.”

Vadik shifted on his feet awkwardly. “Are you guys like… hiring at all? Because I got powers and I’m totally ready to throw them around town.”

Mull looked at Oz. “Is being an asshole a superpower now?”

“Judging by the Capes in this town?” Vadik nodded. “Yeah.”

“Don’t call us, we’ll call you.” Mull pointed at the floor. “Wait right by that phone though, okay? Don’t even leave for a second.”

“We’re looking for your brother.” Oz’s eyes continued scanning the apartment. “Have you seen him?”

“Ilik!” The man yelled into the other room. “A sexy red-haired jungle lady is here to see you!”

There was the sound of scrambling feet as the other man hurried to see the sight his brother promised. He popped into the room, saw Oz, and took off. He ducked back into his room, went through the window, and started to run down the fire escape.

Mull swore, pushing Vadik to the floor as she chased after his brother. “I’ll get him, you get the car, Oz!” She called over her shoulder. “Meet me down there!”

She didn’t give Oz a chance to object to the plan, following straight after the suspect.

He reached the bottom of the fire escape ladder before she did, immediately racing down the alley away from her.

Sadly for him, no matter the power, Mull was very, very fast, even in her bare feet and running on icy pavement. She closed the distance between them almost immediately.

She grabbed him by the shoulder and spun him around. “Where do you think you’re going?”

He swung wildly at her, but she leaned back to dodge the strike. It was more an amusement than an actual threat to her. “What the fuck was that ?”

He swung at her again, but she simply caught his fist in her hand and pushed him back, off balance. “You suck at fighting.” She tried not to roll her eyes, but it was very difficult. “I’m trying to impress my sorta boyfriend with how heroic I can be, but you’re making it really difficult.”

“Leave me alone!” Ilik cried, backing away from her. He held his arms up, flexing like a toddler trying to show you he was angry .

“What the fuck is that?” Mull asked, feeling annoyed now. “No one fights like that! What are you even doing! Put your arms down, you look like an asshole!”

Jungle Lass’ instinct immediately told her to jump onto his back and go caveman on him.

Ground and pound him into the icy concrete.

But… Oz probably wouldn’t like that so much.

Plus, it would make questioning him hard, unless they wanted to wait for a day when she would possibly develop powers which allowed her to speak to the dead.

This guy was just being difficult.

Things were so much more complicated when you had to talk to people rather than just killing them.

How did people do this all day?

He grabbed a piece of broken shipping pallet and tried to club her with it, shrieking like an enraged elephant.

Mull let out a put-upon sigh, and leaned to the side to avoid the strike.Then she hit him in the throat with her open hand, causing him to gasp for breath and stagger backwards, dropping his weapon.

He turned to try to flee down the side alley, but Oz parked the car at the other end, blocking his escape. He stepped from the vehicle, his clothes somehow still pristine. “We’re with the Consortium of Chaos.” He told the man with authority. “Please cooperate.”

The man made a break for it anyway, betting he could slip past Oz. Unfortunately for him, Oz was a master of the “Jailhouse Rock” fighting style, developed in prison cells and yards all over the country, and the confined space of the alley was perfectly suited for the obscure boxing form.

The fight lasted about three seconds.

Mull found herself oddly turned on by how quickly her partner had decimated the guy. It was less a “fight” and more a “sacrifice.” Like some loser had volunteered to be thrown into the ring, just to give Oz a chance to show off.

Again, Mull found Oz very, very sexy.

There was something so oddly appealing about a man who could fight crime without even needing to unbutton his coat.

“What…” the man gasped, still struggling to catch his breath after Oz had punched him in the stomach, “…do you want?”

Oz straightened his suit. “This morning, you robbed a convenience store.”

The man tried to look innocent.

“You did.” Mull confirmed. “The parrot ratted you out. ”

He looked confused by that.

“I don’t care about the robbery,” Oz met the man’s eyes, “I care about the murder.”

“That wasn’t me!” Ilik protested. “That was the other guys!”

“Other guys?” Oz pressed. “Tell me about ‘the other guys.’”

“There were… umm…” Ilik thought about it for a second, “there were four or five of them. A couple guys in suits, a guy with a ponytail, and a couple of cats in hats.”

“’Cats in hats’?” Mull glanced at Oz. “Shit, let’s put out an APB for Dr Suess, Oz.”

“Nah, nah,” Ilik waved his hand, “I mean like dudes in stupid hats! Tough looking guys! They were there too! Guy with the laser gun shot that Cape, man. And that’s when I got the fuck out of there!”

“What about the kid?” Oz’s voice was serious. “You see them with a kid?”

The man nodded. “Yeah, little girl. The guy with the ponytail grabbed her.”

“These guys with the hats,” Oz’s eyes squinted, obviously thinking he was on to something, “what kind of hats?”

‘Like… like that cowboy guy.” Ilik raised his hands to show a rounded shape. “You know the guy?”

“The Lone Ranger?” Oz guessed.

“No, like…” Ilik snapped his fingers. “Bat Masterson. That’s the guy.”

“Dr Seuss and the Sherriff of Dodge City.” She sarcastically patted Oz on the chest with the back of her hand, drawing his attention to their achievement. “ We got the bastards now, Baby Doll! ”

Whatever that meant, Oz seemed to recognize it. His voice became even more serious. “Two men in bowler hats were helping the men wearing the power-armor?”

Ilik nodded.

She looked up at Oz. “That mean something?”

He nodded. “Oh, yeah. It means something.”

At the other end of the alley, a patrol car rolled into view, here to pick up their suspect.

“These officers are going to arrest you now, Ilik.” Oz told the man calmly. “I called them from the car. I think it would be best if you cooperated. Possibly get some drug treatment. Ultimately, it’s your choice, but I think it would really help you turn your life around.”

“I got this, don’t worry about it.” She assured Oz, ushering Ilik forward to make the hand off.

“You’re not going to threaten him, are you?” Oz asked her quietly. “Because I don’t think that’ll do anything but scare him. This needs to be his choice, you can’t force him.”

She shook her head. “Of course not, don’t worry about it.” She smiled at him in reassurance. “Hey, it’s me! It’ll be fine.”

She pushed the other man halfway to their destination, then deliberately shoved him to the right so that he’d fall to the ground.

“Oops! Sorry about that.” She bent down to help him to his feet, then looked over her shoulder to make sure Oz couldn’t see.

“Alright, you little asshole, you and me are gonna do this old school , feel me? None of that ‘community policing’ namby-pamby bullshit.”

Ilik looked scared now.

“See that man over there?” Mull pointed back towards Oz.

“The good-looking one dressed like the sexy offspring of a Good Humor Man and Mr. Rogers? Well, he seems to think that you’re capable of something other than being the asshole we both know you are.

He thinks there’s still hope for you. And he wants you to get on the right road.

Which means that you’re going to turn your little life around.

Right now.” She pulled an obsidian skinning blade from her belt, making sure that Oz couldn’t see it.

“Or I swear to Christ and all the angels, I will take this knife and I will cut off your goddamned face and wipe my ass with it , do you understand me?”

Ilik frantically nodded. “Yes… yes ma’am…” He stammered.