Page 36 of Loving Wild
She’s almost thirteen, and the kid knows what she likes. It probably would’ve been better to let her and Lauren work on this together, they could’ve made it a bonding thing, or whatever it is girls need to do before they decide if they’re gonna like each other.
“Just open the door and have a look,” I order.
Lauren’s eyes snap to mine, and she gives me a wide-eyed, brow raised glare. I shrug. Time to move this along, Ava will either love it or hate it, we just need to find out which.
“I’m scared,” Ava looks between myself and Lauren and admits with a nervous giggle.
“Would you like us to go, so you can take it in by yourself?”
“No,” Ava grabs Lauren’s arm and almost shrieks. “No,” she repeats, quieter this time. “I mean, I don’t think I do. No, no, I definitely don’t.”
“Glad you’ve made that clear,” I mumble, earning myself a glare from both of them. This makes me smile. Ava is now holding Lauren’s hand, and I’m glad they’re bonding over their united pissed offness at me.
“I’ll go in first, you two follow when you’ve sorted your lives out,” I tell them. Not waiting on a response, I move past them, push open the bedroom door, and come to a standstill.
The photos Lauren sent me earlier do not do what she’s done with the room justice. It looked good the other day, but with all the finishing touches she’s added, it looks like something out of a magazine andnothinglike it did before.
Moving across the room, I wait in a spot where I’ll be able to see Ava’s reaction. The overhead light is turned off, but the lights in the bed frame are switched on, as well as the light globes framing the Hollywood style mirror at what Lauren keeps calling a makeup station. My kid’s twelve, it will be a homework desk for at least the next five years—maybe ten!
Ava appears in the doorway, Lauren right behind, still chewing on her bottom lip. Stepping into the room, Ava silently looks around as me and Lauren watch her.
“Dad,” she finally sobs, holding her arms out as she moves towards me. I’m knocked a step back as Ava hits me, head against my chest, arms around my waist.
“Hey,” is all I get out before she interrupts me.
“It’s so beautiful. I’ve never . . . I’ve never had a room like this. Thank you, thank you so much.”
Resting one hand against my daughter’s back, the other on the back of her head, I stroke at her hair as she cries. When I look across to where Lauren’s standing in the doorway, I see that she’s watching us, her own eyes shining with tears.
“I’m gonna leave you two to it,” she says through her own nervous smile as her eyes meet mine.
“Ren,” I call after her as she turns, but she doesn’t respond.
Ava pulls away from me and starts moving around the room, touching the furry throw, picking up the frames, some containing photos of me and her, of her and Sophie, her and Dani, and quietly taking it all in.
“I can’t believe this is all mine,” she whispers.
“Well, it is,” I tell her with a shrug. “I should’ve given you something like this from the start . . .”
“No, Dad, it’s cool. I wasn’t here much before so it didn’t matter, but Mum said I can make my own mind up where I want to spend my time when I’m thirteen, so I can be here, with you more often, if that’s okay with you?”
“Yeah, of course it is,” I reply, hoping my voice hides the shock that Lena has said this to her. The custody agreement gives me every other weekend, half of the school holidays, and Christmas, Easter, birthdays, and any other special occasion worked out between us. As far as I’m aware, we’re not due to review that set-up, but I’m happy if it means I get to see more of my daughter.
“Is everything good at your mum’s, bub? Between you and her, you and Dean?” I watch as Ava remains with her back to me and instead of answering, she picks up a framed picture of me with her on my shoulders in the pool at my dad’s place on Lake Mulwala. I smile at the memory of the day it was taken, at the same time, my gut pulls tight at the fact I know she’s avoiding answering my question.
“Ava, talk to me. Tell me what’s going on.”
I lean back against the wall as my daughter sits on her bed, still staring down at the photo and avoiding eye contact with me.
“It’s cool,” she says with a shrug. “Mum’s just really busy with Mason, and tired because the new baby’s due soon.”
“So where does that leave you?” I ask. “She ignoring you? What, talk to me, Ave?” I know I should at least attempt to pull my head in, but I don’t. My biggest fear since Lena remarried is that my daughter would be overlooked, left out of her new family set-up. Dean seems a decent enough bloke, and I’ve always thought Ava had a good relationship with him, but Lena can be an ice queen when she’s pissed off, and I know that she and Ava have clashed a bit lately.
“She’d have to remember I was there to be able to ignore me,” she says quietly.
“What the fuck does that mean? You better start talking otherwise I’m calling your mother and asking her.”
Holding the frame against her chest, my little girl looks up at me and my fucking heart breaks for her.
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