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“Don’t worry about it. It’s all good.”

With furrowed brows and astute attentiveness, he asks, “Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

He smiles quietly, his teeth grazing his lower lip.

Where’s a fan when you need one? My pulse stirs. Breath hitches. Before I could get a handle on my nerves, they’d already taken over.

With furrowed brows, Judah comments, “You don’t look like you’re sure.”

A barely-there smile tugs at my lips when I say, “It’s fine.”

“It is?”

“Yes.”

“Okay, then.” He hands me his phone and says, “Put your number in and call your phone.”

The nerve of him…

Yet, I like his assertion. Taking his phone, while knowing I shouldn’t be doing this, especially since this isn’t what I thought it was, I key in my number while at the same time regretting it. Judah is not interested in me in the way I initially thought. He just wants me to be his friend.

So, why am I giving him my number?

I’m a mature twenty-eight-year-old woman with plans for a husband and kids.

I don’t want to get caught up with a man who doesn’t have those same interests when Mr. Right could be out there searching for me.

So, before keying the last number, I press the back button, hand Judah the phone back, and say, “Um, look, Judah. I appreciate you. I do, but this is not what I thought it was.”

“What did you think it was?”

“Uhm…you know what? It’s nothing. I have to go,” I say and quickly continue the path to my car. I jump in and pull off. When it’s time to go, it’s time to go.

Okay, I shouldn’t have left like that, but after everything that’s happened, I felt like I needed to.

I let all my windows down and breathe in air, filtering smoke out of my nostrils.

Then I call Riley. It’s late, but she’s probably up.

No, she is up and out somewhere. It’s turn-up-o’clock for her.

I just hope she’s sober enough to talk, because I need to vent.

“Yello!” she answers.

“Hey, Riley?”

“Wassup? How was your daaaate ?” she sings.

“Are you home?” I ask.

“Yes…just got here. I’m tired. I didn’t go out after all. I stayed home and popped my own bottle.”

That explains why she’s hyper past midnight.

She yawns loudly, then asks, “How was your date?”

“That’s what I was calling to talk to you about. So, turns out it wasn’t a date.”

“Then what was it?”

“It was me hanging out with Judah and his friends around a freakin’ bonfire in the middle of the woods, drinking beer.

Well, I didn’t drink any beer. I had water, but they were all sipping and talking.

And get this—his group of friends consists of more women than men, by the way, and they all came over to introduce themselves to me, telling their special stories of how they met Judah.

By the way they were talking, you’d think the man was a saint.

You should’ve seen them, Riley. They all looked like they were in love with the man, but for some reason, he turned them all down and requested nothing but friendship.

And these women—you should’ve seen them.

They’re all beautiful. Every last one of them.

I’m talking supermodel beautiful – even the crazy one that was staring at the moon for most of the night. ”

“Wait—do you think he’s sleeping with these women? It’s giving orgy.”

“That’s what I thought, at first, but after talking to them, I found out that Judah informed them all that he’s not interested in a relationship. He told them the same thing he told me—he likes to surround himself with good people.”

“This is crazy.”

“Tell me about it…”

“I mean, I saw the way you two interacted at the ice cream shop,” Riley recalls. “There was definitely some sparks there.”

“There wasn’t. He was just being nice. Apparently, it’s what he does.”

“How can you be so sure?”

“Because the girls at the campfire confirmed it by telling me their stories of the nice things he did for them. And one of them said she might’ve overheard him say he had cancer, which would explain why he steers clear of relationships.”

“Oh, wow. Do you think that’s true?”

“I don’t know.”

“I wouldn’t believe anything unless it came directly out of his mouth.”

“It doesn’t matter. I don’t think I’m going to see him anymore.”

“Come on, Autumn. You give up waaaay too easily, girlfriend.”

“Perhaps I should call you after the liquor wears off.”

“Unt un—don’t do that. I only had two drinks. I know what I’m talking about. You’re giving up. Face it.”

“I’m not giving up,” I respond, irritation settling at my temples. “I’m moving on with life. That’s how this works.”

“No. That’s how you work.”

“You act like you’ve never met a guy who’s charming and gorgeous, and once you got to know him, he turned out not to be what you hoped.”

“We’ve all been there, but no ma’am. This is not that . You met Judah for a reason.”

“Riley—”

“Do you deny it?”

I pull in the parking lot at my place and sigh heavily, feeling defeated. “No, I don’t, but everything isn’t supposed to be something, if that makes sense.”

“Agreed, but this is something. I can feel it. I’m not telling you what to do. I just want to urge you to not cut the man off without exploring the situation a bit further.”

“Okay. Fine. If the situation presents itself, I may, but if it doesn’t, I’m not going to track him down. I’m not desperate to meet a man.”

“I know that, Autumn. Look—get some sleep. You sound tired.”

“I’m exhausted and I need to shampoo this smoke smell out of my hair, so I probably won’t get to bed until two.”

“Then I’ll let you go. Talk to you later.”

“Alright. Later.”

I go inside, hang up my purse, and toss my keys on the counter. Then I head straight for my bedroom where I strip off my clothes and step into the shower, washing my body and shampooing my hair. Beneath the water, I close my eyes and see his face.

Judah.

Disappointment settles deep into my chest. I had hoped for something different with Judah, but the night didn’t unfold as I had expected.

I’ll take my losses and move on, but I doubt I’ll ever have that overwhelming feeling of anticipation in my chest for another man.

How could I when it hit me so hard with him?