Page 11
Story: Let Me
My day couldn’t have gone any better. I’m so high right now, I can scream.
The fluttering this man left in my chest and my stomach has me floating.
When I returned home, I couldn’t even think straight.
I couldn’t do anything. For the last half hour, I’ve been lying face up on my bed staring at the ceiling, seeing his face the whole time.
There has never been another man who made me feel anything remotely close to this.
I could die today and be satisfied that I got to know and spend time with such an amazing man.
When my phone vibrates on my nightstand, I sit up quickly to retrieve it, thinking that it’s him.
It’s not.
I growl my disappointment when I see that it’s Riley – not that I don’t want to talk to my girl. It’s just that I want to talk to him more at the moment.
“Hey, Riley.”
“You know why I’m calling, so give me all the details.”
“Riley,” I began, lying back in the same position and say, “Today was perfect. Oh my God…I’m talking romance-novel perfect.
Hallmark-movie perfect. It was everything.
Like, you know how you put up your defenses sometimes when you don’t know how something is going to go?
I sort of did that, but quickly realized I didn’t need to.
Judah planned the perfect picnic lunch at Lake Julian.
We actually got on a paddle boat and, after we pedaled to the center of the lake, we ate a lunch that he packed.
Ah! It was whimsical. The whole time we were out there, it felt like I was in a dream.
And then after we left there, he made it clear that he didn’t want us to go our separate ways and I was so glad that he did because I wasn’t ready for the day to be over either, so I suggested we go to the nature center. We talked, took pictures, held hands—”
“Held hands? I thought he just wanted to be friends.”
“He does.”
“But none of this sounds real friendly if you ask me.”
“See—you’re already making judgments and I ain’t even done yet.”
“Okay, continue.”
“We stayed out there for a while, took pictures and when we left there, he walked me back to my car and—”
“And? Don’t be leaving stuff out.”
“I thought he was going to kiss me. He looked like he wanted to, but he didn’t.”
“Umm hmm…he’s trying to get close without getting too close. Ay, I know you over there swimming in butterflies and whatnot, but you do know this man told you he only wanted to be friends, right?”
“Yep. I remember.”
“Then—”
“It’s fine, Riley. I’ll go with whatever he wants, for now.”
“Okay…” she says as if I can’t ascertain the skepticism in her voice.
“Riley…come on.”
“What? I didn’t even say anything.”
“You didn’t have to. I hear it in your voice.”
“I mean, I’m just curious as to how far you’re willing to go with him. He told you he didn’t want a relationship.”
“I know.”
“He told you he has cancer.”
“I know, but what if I told you that’s not a deterrent for me?”
“No, Autumn. Don’t do this to yourself. You’re thinking with your heart and not your head.”
“I like him, Riley. Should I just dismiss the way he makes me feel?”
“How does he make you feel?”
I breathe and say, “He makes me feel like I can fly. Like I can do anything. I feel excitement.”
“He told you he only wanted to be friends.”
“Yeah, but men change their minds all the time, right?”
“Girl, you’re giving me a headache.”
“Okay, so put yourself in my shoes. If you were me and you met a guy who had a diagnosis like cancer, but he’s the most incredible man you’ve ever met in your entire life, what would you do?”
“The most incredible man you’ve ever met? That’s what he is to you?”
“He is.”
“Then I really don’t have anything else to say against it. I mean, wow! Really, Autumn? I don’t ever recall you being so infatuated.”
“It’s not infatuation.”
“Then what is it?”
I shrug. “Right now, it’s something I can’t explain, but I’m loving it. I really am.”
“Just be careful, girl. I wouldn’t want you to mess around and get your hopes and dreams dashed behind chasing a guy who clearly said he didn’t want a relationship.”
“I get that, and I’m glad I got you to look out for me. However, I think there’s something with Judah that I need to explore despite what he said he didn’t want. I have to do this, Riley. I want to.”
“Then, go for it.”
“Thank you. Alright. I better get ready for bed—gotta be up bright and early in the morning.”
“Me, too.”
Table of Contents
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- Page 11 (Reading here)
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