Page 65 of Husband to Go

I thought I could hold it together but hearing Jane’s voice causes a waterfall of tears. I start sobbing, thinking about everything that’s gone wrong lately, and how it’s my fault. Even the stuff that wasn’t my fault makes me sad.

“Oh, baby. I didn’t mean to make you cry. Where are you? I’ll come pick you up.”

“I’m outside my mom’s building,” I sputter.

Jane heaves a sigh.

“Okay, I’m on my way. Hold tight.” I hang up the phone and take a seat on the curb. I’ve never felt more awful in my life. The shittiest thing about all of this is that there are so many things going on that I’m having trouble making sense of any of them. I thought I was doing the right thing by apologizing to my mom, but instead, it’s only highlighted how little Veronica cares about me. The thought makes me sob even harder.

Jane pulls up about twenty minutes later. She turns off her car and rushes to my side. She pulls me into a hug, rubbing my back.

“Oh, sweetie,” she whispers. “It’s not that bad.”

I rest my forehead on her shoulder, finding comfort in this embrace. Being with my aunt almost always makes me feel better.

“Come on, let’s get out of here.”

I follow her to the car and curl up in the passenger’s seat. We drive back to her house in New Jersey in silence. Well, not total silence. Jane turns on some classical music. The strains are calming, and I feel a bit better as the violins sing.

“We’re here,” she says softly while pulling into the driveway. The two of us get out of the car and go inside. “Do you want something to eat? I can make you a sandwich, and there’s some leftover cake from Gordon’s work party too.”

“Oh, is Gordon here?” I haven’t seen my uncle in a while. He didn’t come to any of the pre-wedding festivities, probably because he and Veronica never really got along. I like him, though. He’s chubby with a wicked sense of humor, and treats my aunt right. Jane smiles.

“No, he’s at work. He’ll be back later tonight, so we have some time for just the two of us. Did you want something to eat?”

“No,” I shake my head. “I’m not really hungry.”

I almost feel sick. It’s never been this bad, and I’m not sure how to deal with it.

“That’s fine. Let’s go to the living room, and you can tell me what’s wrong.” Jane and I take our places on the couch. I don’t know where to start because there’s so much I want to say, but Jane begins.

“I’m sure at this point you know that the wedding was cancelled. You did miss a hell of a show, though,” she comments.

I cock my head to the side.

“Really, what happened?”

Jane sighs.

“Veronica went apeshit. She was a total bridezilla, yelling at everyone. It wasn’t surprising when Tanner called the whole thing off because who would want to get married tothat? Unfortunately, I had to deal with her hissy fit, but I think she’s fine now.”

That’s funny. People think Tanner called off the wedding because of Veronica’s bad attitude? That means they have no idea that I was involved.

“Have you seen Tanner recently?” I ask carefully.

“No, but I’m sure he’s fine,” says Jane dismissively. “That man dodged a bullet and he should be thankful. Meanwhile, where have you been, sweetheart? We’ve missed you around here. I thought you’d be at the ceremony, but then everything blew up and it was a complete disaster. Is everything okay?”

I take a deep breath.

“Well, actually, I didn’t go to the ceremony because I checked myself into a mental institution. Tanner was the one who picked me up.”

Jane’s hand goes to my shoulder and her expression is one of shock.

“A mental institution? But why? Is everything okay? Are you feeling better?”

“I am,” I nod. “But that’s not the reason why I was so upset.”

“What happened, then?”