Page 44 of Husband to Go

“Yes, but the same advice you gave me, applies to you as well. We have toownour pasts. We have to own the present too, and that means facing the truth about the world head-on.”

My sister shoots me a wry grin.

“Sounds you knew what you needed to hear, Tanner. You didn’t need advice from me.”

I start a bit. Holy shit, she might be right. After all, there’s no way to dodge the issue that Kylie is Veronica’s daughter. Nothing can change that: not money, not time, nor a stroke of good fortune. Kylie and Veronica are related by blood, and there’s no magical thinking that will make this unfortunate circumstance go away.

In short, the only thing I can do is to change myself. I have to come to terms with the fact that Kylie is Veronica’s daughter, and that I love her in spite of it. Suddenly, I’m in a rush to find the beautiful girl. Where is she? I have to tell her that I accept her, despite the familial connection, and I want to make it work.

“Lacey, I have to go,” I announce abruptly while racing to the door.

She grins.

“Of course, big brother. But don’t be a stranger okay? Your nephew wants to see you. I wish I’d known you were coming because I would have kept him home from daycare. You really should visit more.”

I nod, suddenly chastened.

“I’ll try. I promise,” are my rushed words as I dart out the door.

“I know. I hope you know you’re welcome here whenever you want,” my sister calls after me as I get in my car.

“I know, and I’ll do better,” is my promise as I pull out onto the street with one last harried wave. “Bye Lace! See you soon!”

She waves, and her figure recedes as I press the metal to the floor. I need to see Kylie. I need to explain my position and tell her everything on my mind because this girl is worth it. My heart is in my throat, and the traffic makes me grip the steering wheel with rage as I look frantically out the windshield. Kylie, Kylie, Kylie. We need to talk because this woman means so much to me, and finally, I’ve realized that I need to be open and tell her how much I care.

14

Kylie

Iwake up this morning horrified with myself. I’m alone in bed. Tanner’s not here, but then again, I haven’t seen him in a few days now. After the amazing time we had in my room, he left without a sound while I was sleeping. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised because that’s his MO. But still, I’m disappointed with myself. Once again, I gave into his persuasive kisses and reveled in the feel of his hands on me.

And every second with him was pure bliss.

So much for getting any answers from the man. Meanwhile, I sigh. Do I have any integrity left? Can I even call myself a good person anymore? What the hell is wrong with me?

I’m not even mad at him anymore. I mean, what’s the point? It’s not like he’s forcing me to be a horrible person. All he does is offer me the opportunity, and I jump on him every time. I decide all on my own to say yes to getting dirty with him. The real issue is I’m not sure if I can say no.

There’s not a damn person on this earth I can blame for this but myself. I turn over again and will myself to go back to sleep.

* * *

I don’t knowwhat to throw into this duffle bag. I grab clothes, some books, and toiletries. Packing for a trip like this, there’s no guidebook or anything. Plus, I’m not thinking straight. This decision might be impulsive, it might be stupid, but it can’t be worse than the fact that I’ve slept with my future stepdad far too many times now. I don’t even want to figure out the exact number. I know it’s more than three, and that’s enough to make me cringe.

I mean, once was too much, but forgivable. After all, back in the nightclub, we didn’tknoweach other. We were strangers. But now, I’m way past that point. Hopefully, I’m not past the point of no return, though. I need to be able to get back to old Kylie, and this trip is the first step.

I need to get away from him. Talking to Tanner gets me into trouble, so I’m taking off for a little bit. Maybe even for a long while - however long it takes to get back to the old me. I’m willing to go through the process.

My fingers surf the web for the registrar’s phone office. If I’m going to take this leave, I’ll have to drop out of school. A voice picks up on the third ring.

“Hello, Registrar’s Office. This is Carly speaking. How may I help you?”

“Hi, Carly. My name is Kylie Mitchell, and I’m a student at Brooks. I’m calling because I’d like to drop out.”

There’s a momentary pause.

“Of course, Ms. Mitchell. Is there a reason you’re dropping out?” I’m prepared for this question.

“Yes, I need to take some time off for health reasons.” It’s true after all – my mental health is impaired given this conundrum with Tanner. That counts, doesn’t it? Besides, I’m not going to get into the nitty gritty with some stranger on the phone.