Page 10 of Husband to Go

Jane pulls me up.

“Alright, come on.”

Together, we weave through the crowd, making our way closer and closer to this mysterious person. I’m not even sure what I’ll say to him, to be honest:Hi Dad Number Four. You do realize you’re Number Four, right? Should I even call you Dad?

I guess ‘congratulations’ should cut it.

We get close enough, and I can see my mom. Veronica looks beautiful, as always. Her blonde hair is swept up into a chignon, and she’s draped in a pale peach dress that highlights her svelte figure. Her expression is animated, and she’s got her hand on the arm of a man next to her.

It must be Tanner, her new fiancé. From the back, he looks fine. His dark hair is swept back, and his broad shoulders are emphasized by a perfectly-cut suit. Much else, I can’t see.

My mom catches sight of me and Jane approaching.

“Jane, Kylie!” she calls while waving. “This way!”

She pokes her fiancé, and as if in slow motion, he turns. It’s like a movie where everything is happening at a snail’s pace. His shoulder turns. Then his chest. And then, I get a glimpse of his profile. I nearly faint because holy shit on a stick! It’stheguy! And when I saytheguy, I meanthe guy! The one from Friday night. The one I so unceremoniously made love with in the VIP booth of a random club two nights ago.

He’s marryingmy mom? How is that possible?

The universe literally stops dead in its tracks. I wouldn’t be surprised if the earth stops moving, and the sun pauses in its ascent over the sky.

This can’t be happening. No, absolutely not. This is a disaster of titanic proportions.

But then the man turns towards me, and recognition flashes in his eyes. Is he feeling the same abject horror I am? Does he want to curl into a ball and die? Does he wish the earth would swallow him whole?

Because I do.

Oh god, what am I going to do? What does one do when you’ve made love to your mother’s fiancé?

4

Tanner

I’m standing here, listening to Veronica drone on and on about some random topic I couldn’t give two shits about, when I hear her sister, Jane call out.

“Oh, it’s Jane and Kylie. You finally get to meet my daughter!” twitters Veronica with a bright smile. I’ve been mentally preparing for this moment. Veronica’s told me a little bit about her daughter, but I tuned it all out because I’m not interested in being a stepfather. A long time ago, I decided I wouldn’t make much of a dad, and stuck to my guns.

But you have to act a certain way in public sometimes. I put on a fake smile, ready to go through all the necessary steps to say the right things. It’ll lead to fewer problems in the future.

I turn around and see Jane. Next to her is someone eerily familiar, but where do I know her from?

Oh shit.

No way in hell!

This isnothappening.

She’s the girl from the club. The one that I touched and savored to my heart’s content.

Buthow?

I mean the odds that my soon to be stepdaughter is also some random hookup I had just two nights ago are so low.

But here we are.

I don’t even know what possessed me to go to that club. I know it’s one that attracts a lot of the college crowd, something I like to avoid. Typically, I just avoid the whole club scene in general.

But something in me wanted to do it a little different that night. I’d just gotten back from a work trip. I was bored and I thought, “What the hell?” It’s not like anything was going to happen.