Page 55 of Holly Jolly July

Shit. He has me there. “I just, um. I wanted to hear your voice?” I can’t help the upward inflection, cringing at myself.

“That’s so sweet,” he says, not noticing how false I sound. “I missed your voice, too. If now doesn’t work, I can come to

you in Vancouver. It’s not every day you reconnect with someone so special.”

Ellie’s mouth falls open in shock.

I grind my teeth. “Yeah, you sure are something. I’ll definitely see you again before I go home. It will be an experience

you won’t forget.”

“Looking forward to it already,” he growls.

I hang up without another word.

Ellie’s already pacing, her tennis shoes squeaking with every angry stomp. “He hasn’t learned a damn thing!”

“Nope.”

“And if he’s already sorted out the scrambled contacts then he’s probably fixed all those sexting words we replaced.”

“Wish we could have seen that in action,” Ellie agrees.

“We were a bit... distracted.”

Ellie lifts a shoulder shyly. If it weren’t for the makeup caked on her face, I know she’d be blushing.

“Okay. No more distractions,” Ellie says, returning to her pacing. “We need to teach him a lesson. A final lesson. Up until now it’s been child’s play. We’re going to make this guy rue the day he started toying with women’s hearts.

We’ll show him exactly what happens when you mess with us. And not just for us, but for all the women he’s played.”

“Yep.”

“We’ll make him beg our forgiveness. He’ll be grovelling and licking our boots when we’re finished with him. He won’t know

his asshole from his elbow when we’re through. We’ll make him crawl back home to his mama and—”

“Ellie! You coming?” Yueyi calls from the café door.

“Be right there!” She replies in her chipper voice before turning back to me and lowering her tone, anger flashing wildly

in her eyes. “Tonight, we finish this. We’ll both come up with plans and reconvene to end this once and for all.”

I want nothing more than to pull Ellie’s feisty ass in for a kiss, but I don’t. Yueyi is watching, and we haven’t talked about

whether we’re keeping us between us or letting others know. Hell, I don’t know if there even is an us. Instead of doing what I want to do, I give her a curt nod. Ellie nods back, then straightens herself, forces a smile

on her face, and walks back across the sidewalk to disappear into the café.

After giving Ellie a bit of a head start, I follow her onto the set to assist Jimmie with touch-ups. I can’t help but grin

watching her transform from her fun, bubbly self into her character. Between scenes she keeps spirits up with jokes I can’t

hear, sincere compliments, and the occasional Christmas tune. She really, truly is the life of the party back here, everyone

depending on her to keep the mood light. I feel ridiculously proud of her, my chest squeezing as I watch, and wish I could

steal her away between takes to make out with her in the green room.

When we break for lunch I let Ellie stay with her acting team, not wanting to distract her, while I join the other artists and crew in the picnic table break area in the alley.

While munching on my BLT, I take a deep breath and prepare myself to open TikTok.

As soon as I do, I’m inundated by notifications from thousands of new likes, comments, and followers.

It’s impossible to keep track of everything, and I gave up trying to read all the comments after the first day I posted our alien video.

I feel bad that these people are following me expecting something as awesome as the video that went viral to happen again, but that’s impossible.

At least, it is without Ellie.

I watch it again and again, lingering over the moments of us being close, witnessing the natural spark between us, the fire

being lit, leading to the most intensely romantic experience of my life. My heart squeezes at the thought that it might be

over soon. I can’t let that happen. I have to get over my fears and work up the courage to be honest with her. Ellie is the

easiest person in the world to talk to. It won’t be that bad. I’ve been with a lot of different people of varying genders,

and I know first-hand how rare an experience it is to immediately connect with someone like I have with Ellie.

I’m not going to let my past get in the way of my future.

Tomorrow, when filming is over and our mission with Jax is complete, once we have no more distractions, I’ll talk to Ellie

about us being together as a couple.

My heart settles, but my stomach clenches. Even if she rebukes me, at least I’ll know.

I flip from the video of us together to the private messages and scroll through. I reply to a few of them, ignore the rest,

but pause on one that stands out. It looks... professional.

Sorry for contacting you like this. Couldn’t find your website. We saw your TikTok and are impressed by your skills. We’re

working on an indie horror project here in LA and would like to do something similar. If you’re interested, please send your

resume...

I read it again and again, the words becoming blurrier as I do. With shaking fingers, I google the name of the company and my jaw nearly hits the table.

“You okay?” one of the other assistants asks. Stefanie. Or was it Stacey?

“Yeah. I’m fine.” I shift over, hiding my phone .

Pushing my plate away, no longer hungry, I read through the projects the company has worked on. They’re legit. Legit as hell.

And they’re based in LA—a real production company! Still indie B movies, not quite Hollywood, but so much closer than I am

right now.

Trying not to get my hopes up, I reply that I am interested and will forward my resume. I manage to find it in an old email

and add in my current work project and Jimmie’s number as a reference in the body of the email. I hit Send before I can talk

myself out of it. I doubt Jimmie will give me a good reference after showing up late twice, not reading the script on time,

and just generally being a newb in the industry, but he’s the only film reference I have.

Nothing will come of it, but damn, just to be considered is such an incredible honour. I can’t wait to tell Ellie.

I manage to eat half of my sandwich, my mind still boggled by the message I’d received, before my phone rings.

Mother.

I frown at the caller ID. In my mind I’d crossed Mom and Dad off my mental to-do list and didn’t expect to hear from her again

until a birthday or some other such holiday. I answer it with a confused “Hello?”

“Oh. Oh, hi! You answered. I was not expecting that.”

Guilt needles my chest, but I stay silent.

“Your dad and I were wondering, well, hoping you’d... Will we see you again before you go home?”

I think for a long moment, unsure of what to say. Mom fills the silence again.

“You and your lovely girlfriend Ellie are welcome to come for dinner. I was thinking maybe tonight would be nice? I’m making roast beef, mashed potatoes, gravy, and pickled beets from the garden. I thought you two might enjoy it.”

My mouth waters just thinking of Mom’s homemade gravy.

“Or if you’re busy we could make a plan to come see you? We’ve never been to your new place, and...”

Mom continues on about dinner plans. Why is she trying so damn hard after being so distant for so long? Maybe she really likes

Ellie and wants her around—who wouldn’t? But when they saw Ellie and me together before, when she pretended to be my girlfriend,

we hadn’t had feelings for each other yet. Now we do—at least, I do. It would be obscene to pretend to be girlfriends when

we haven’t yet discussed our future— if we have a future. I can’t parade Ellie around on my arm as a fake girlfriend without knowing where we stand, and I can’t

pretend to be something we’re not. If my parents ever see us together again it will be because what we have is real and honest.

Unsure of what to tell my mom, I cut her off, my stomach twisting into knots the more she talks. “I’ll have to talk to Ellie

about it and get back to you.”

“Oh, okay. Yes. Of course. Well, you tell that girl of yours how wonderful she is, and hopefully we will see you both soon.

Okay?”

“Okay.”

“Maria? I mean... Mariah?”

I blink a few times, never having heard her say my name with my chosen pronunciation before. “Yeah?”

She takes a slow breath. “I love you.”

Squeezing my eyes tight, I let her words sink in, coating my heart like chocolate sauce over an ice cream cone. How long has

it been since she’s told me that? Since I’ve told her? Despite how estranged we’ve been, how far she’s pushed me away, how

little she knows about who I am, and how little she’s tried to learn, she’s still my mom. My breath leaves my lungs in a shaky

exhale. Then I reply, “Love you, too.”

She sniffs, and I can almost hear her smile when she tells me goodbye and hangs up.

I clutch my phone to my chest and take a moment to let all the emotions swirling around in my heart settle down, letting myself

feel the depths of sadness for all the time we’ve lost, the confusion with all this change, and the glimmer of hope for the

future.

But I can’t help but wonder, why now? There’s a nagging feeling in my gut that the reason things are shifting between my mom

and me is because of Ellie and her sunshine radiance blasting through the walls we’ve erected over the years. Without Ellie,

none of this would be happening. Without Ellie, the little ground Mom and I have made up might be lost, and we’ll go back

to terse indifference—two souls who don’t understand each other and never will.

That’s a lot of pressure to put on Ellie, and the last thing we need right now is more of that.