Page 21 of Holly Jolly July
work. It feels weird to go back to his place now, knowing he is—”
She glares at me.
“That he might ,” I correct, “not be the person he says he is.”
Ellie nods. “Where does he work?”
“A little dive bar at the edge of the city, past the tracks, on your way out to Hope.”
“Okay. I’ll see if I can talk to him after I’m done here, too. We’ll reconvene later.” Ellie leaves to film her scenes.
I collapse into the chair. It spins slowly so that I’m facing myself in the mirror, but I can’t bring myself to look up. I
don’t want to see the face of a complete clown.
I find myself so distracted on set that Jimmie has to prompt me multiple times to get up and fix Ellie’s makeup or readjust
a curl escaping her bun. My mind is too busy whirring back and forth between hope, anger, and sadness. I thought by now I
understood men, or at least couldn’t be fooled by them. It feels gross knowing that I can still be swayed by a pretty face
and empty words.
By the time filming is over and I’m sitting in the parking lot of Grumpy Joe’s, looking at Jax’s little purple pickup truck
parked along the side, I’m not sure what to think, except that I have to know the truth.
Walking as tall as I can, I enter the dimly lit space and catch sight of Jax at his usual spot. He looks up at me, but his
slow smile does less for my libido than it did yesterday. I take my usual seat, but it feels uncomfortable now, like my ass
is either too big or too small for it.
“Hey,” I manage.
He leans over the bar. “Hey, you.”
I regard his features, trying to spot a crack in his facade. “I thought I’d come pay you a visit.”
He nods his chin over his shoulder. “There’s one more camera blind spot back there. It’s in the walk-in fridge, though, so
it’ll be a little chilly.”
Does he seriously think I want to be banged in a walk-in fridge next to all the produce and condiments? I can’t be the first
one to take him up on that offer. Would I have, if Ellie’s revelation hadn’t tarnished my image of him? I don’t want to know
the answer to that.
“Rain check.”
“Okay. Can I get you a drink?”
“Sure. Whiskey. Neat.”
“Rough day?” He pulls out a rocks glass and free-pours two fingers.
I toss it back, setting the empty glass onto the bar with a loud clink. “You could say that.”
He pours three more fingers. “Want to talk about it?”
My heart softens momentarily, then hardens once more. Here we go. Five seconds of bravery. “I was thinking about going back
to your place, but I was worried about cramping your style. You know, with other people.”
An old guy with a grey moustache and hunched back limps up to the bar and takes a seat a few barstools away, his chair squeaking
on the old floors. Jax and I eye him, annoyed by the interruption.
“Bottle of Bud,” he drawls.
Jax leaves for a moment to serve his customer, then turns back to me, leaning even closer on the bar and speaking in a hushed
tone. “No one else is there, Mariah. It’s just you and me.”
“Just right now? Or in general?”
He tilts his head to the side. “Is everything okay? It’s not like you to be so self-conscious like this.”
“How do you know how I am? We’ve only been together a few days. In high school I don’t think you said more than two words
to me, and I’m pretty sure they were in reference to my breasts.”
Reaching across the bar, he takes my hand in his. “Doesn’t mean I didn’t want to, Mariah.”
My hand warms, tingles running down my arm. “You did?”
He nods. “Every time I wanted to say something to you, I got so tongue-tied.”
I blush, imagining infamous popular jock Jax secretly pining after me. I like the thought of that far too much.
“And then after Bethany,” he continues, dropping his gaze momentarily, “I couldn’t. You know? I always felt like you were the one that got away.”
“And now you want to be with me?”
“I always did.”
I bite my lip against a smile.
“That’s my girl,” he says, caressing my lip with his thumb. Once again, I’m putty in his hands.
I want to let it go, to put this all behind me, and maybe take him up on his offer of the blind spot in the fridge.
But I have to be sure.
I look directly at him and take a steadying breath. “Am I the only person you’re seeing right now?”
Jax squeezes my hand in his, regarding me with those gorgeous big brown eyes of his. “I don’t give just anyone the key to
my place. Okay? I never thought I’d see you again, and then there you were. Out of nowhere. When I needed you most. I only
have eyes for you.”
I smile fully now, calmed by his words and ready to put all of this behind me. Ellie was right. How could Jax and Matt be
the same person? They’re nothing alike. I’m embarrassed I even brought it up. The whole thing is absurd. Preposterous. I can’t
wait to tell Ellie tomorrow that this was all just a weird misunderstanding. She and Matt can go on with their whirlwind fairy-tale
romance, and Jax and I can continue making up for what we missed out on all those years ago.
I’m so relieved. Jax is an honest person, the perfect mix of rough and soft, a dom with a sweet side, he’s a—
“You know,” Jax says, the corner of his mouth tilting up in a smile. “I must have been a pretty good person in my past life
for karma to bring you my way.”
Lying scumbag!
I swallow back a sudden wave of nausea and force a smile to my face. “Yeah. Same. Okay, well, I have to... go.”
He frowns. “You’re leaving?”
“Yeah, I need to leave. My parents, you know, expecting me.” I shift off the barstool, nearly tripping on my own feet.
“Okay. I’ll see you later?”
I back away from the bar, shaking. “Sure will. Yep.”
“All right. Have a great night.”
Turning on my heel, I walk away as fast as possible. Outside, I gasp in the fresh air, swallowing lungfuls while simultaneously
being unable to catch my breath.
He used the exact same line on me that he used on Ellie, and his delivery was so smooth it didn’t even faze him. How many
women has he used that line on? How many women is he playing at the same time? I can’t believe I was dumb enough to be fooled
by the biggest playboy in all of Chilliwack. He played me like I was still a naive, starry-eyed teenager. Like I haven’t learned
anything since high school. I thought things would be different now that we’re adults, but I should have known better. Sometimes
people change, and sometimes they don’t.
I’ll be okay once my bruised ego recovers; Jax isn’t the first asshole to lie to me. If anything, he’s just given me about
ten more reasons to avoid dating the opposite sex.
There’s no way Ellie could have known; she really caught feelings for this cheating sonofabitch. He lied to her outright,
his intent so unbelievably malicious.
She deserves better than this. We both do. Every woman does.
I have to tell her tomorrow.
Until then, though, I have no other option but to do what I’ve been dreading ever since arriving back in Chilliwack.
With shaking fingers, and doing my best to hold back angry tears, I pick up my phone and dial my mom. It rings once, and—
A hand grabs my shoulder. I twist around with a shocked gasp as the old man from the bar reaches for me. I pull my fist back
to punch the creep in the face.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa!” he cries in a high-pitched voice, raising his hands in defence.
I hesitate, my fist clenched, ready to swing. That voice. “Wait, are you...?”
The old man lowers his sunglasses. “It’s me. Ellie.”
Recognition snaps into place and I lower my hand, my fear replaced by confusion. “Ellie? What the... What are you doing
here? And why are you dressed like an old biker?”
“Hello? Mariah? Are you there?”
I hold my phone to my ear. “Uh, yeah. Sorry, the director just walked up, can I call you back in a minute?” I hang up before
Mom can respond.
Ellie’s shoulders sag. “I’m sorry. I had to see for myself.” She raises a hand quickly. “Not that I don’t trust you, I just...”
“I get it. I’d have had to see it for myself, too.”
Ellie sighs, blowing her moustache away from her mouth. “Do you want to come back to my place so we can talk about this?”
Looking from my phone to Ellie, I’m not sure who I’d rather spend time with: my mother, or the woman who is banging the same
guy as me. Which would be less awkward and painful?
“Yes. Let’s go back to your place.”