Page 3 of Gratification in Gluttony (Passing Through Cafe #2)

Chapter three

Bulldozer, Baby

Fifteen minutes later, Toni and Oliver arrived back at the booth, drinks for their party in hand. As they distributed them, Toni made sure to grab Jude’s whiskey sour—whatever that was—so he could make his introduction.

Sliding the drink across the table, he put on his most charming smile as Jude’s attention shifted from whatever Willow was saying to the tumbler full of yellowish liquor. Then to Toni’s face, where his gaze locked on Toni’s mouth—or more accurately, the jaggedly sharp teeth inside Toni’s mouth. The human’s expression glitched, his heart rate sky-rocketing.

Shit, was Toni scaring him? That was not the plan. He wanted to seduce him, not terrify him.

“Hey,” he said, in hopes of distracting Jude from what was possibly a frightening facial feature common to Toni’s species. “Jude, right?”

“Yeah,” Jude said, clearing his throat as he smiled hesitantly up at him. “Hi.”

“I’m Toni. You know, the guy who doesn’t fuck his best friend,” he said with a good-natured chuckle, and Jude’s smile widened.

“Right. Yeah, I, uh, I remember.”

With a grimace, Toni straightened and shrugged. “Yeah, I figured. That’s why I’m just leaning into it now.”

“Good strategy,” Jude said with a chuckle, lifting his cocktail to his mouth.

“The bartender didn’t know what a whiskey sour was.” Toni spoke up before Jude could take a sip, and the human hesitated with his glass in front of his chin. “But Oliver explained it. Hopefully it tastes okay.”

Jude took a cautious sip, then nodded. “Tastes good.”

“Good.” Toni propped his hands on his hips, still standing at the edge of the table as nearly everyone, except Tad and Oliver—who was focused on tasting his own fruity cocktail—stared at him.

After a beat of silence, Jude said, “Thanks. For the drink.”

“You’re welcome,” Toni said.

Another beat of silence. More staring. Why was everyone staring? It made Toni nervous, which was super weird. He hardly ever got nervous.

“I’m just gonna be over here,” Toni said, pointing stupidly at his chair beside the booth.

Jude pressed his lips together like he was staving off a smile before he nodded and said, “Okay.”

“Okay,” Toni echoed before turning and collapsing into his seat, a foreign feeling taking root in his chest and traveling upward until his face and neck felt hot. Embarrassed. Toni was embarrassed. What the fuck?

He shifted in the chair specially designed for an Elas, ensuring his spinal fin slotted comfortably into the opening in the back. As the lights on stage started to flash, Gem met Toni’s gaze above Oliver’s head, and they proceeded to have one of their silent conversations that could only be born from the longest of friendships.

“What was that?” Gem’s expression seemed to say.

Toni splayed his hands. “I don’t fucking know! I choked!”

Gem grimaced in sympathy. “I think you choked.”

Toni scowled. “I know! I just said that.”

Gem’s eight eyes widened dangerously. “Do not yell at me!”

Toni held up his hands in surrender. “Sorry, sorry.”

As the announcer welcomed everyone and started Zef’s introduction, they paused their conversation, Gem shaking his head, lips pinched in annoyance. Toni ducked his head in submission, struggling to banish the warmth still baking his cheeks.

When Zef slunk onto the stage, looking hot as the lake of fire, Oliver and Jude—as well as the entire crowd in the club—went wild. Toni whistled as Gem cheered, and Zef sent a small smile their way before they opened their mouth and started to sing.

Toni didn’t know all the words like Gem and Willow did, but he cheered and clapped along anyway, drumming the beat on his thighs. At some point, Zef sang a human song—something about raining men—and Jude stood, hauling Oliver with him, so they could sing along. Unable to resist, Toni pulled out his phone and recorded the humans as they laughed and sang boisterously into the microphone Zef pointed at them from the edge of the stage.

“This is amazing,” Jude said as he and Oliver sat back down, his smile wide with excitement. It was, objectively, a nice smile. It made the corners of his eyes crinkle and two divots in his cheeks appear. Dimples, Toni thought they were called in English. They were almost as adorable as the human who wore them.

As Zef’s set came to a close, the club erupted in another raucous clamor of cheers and whistles. Oliver and Jude jumped to their feet again and whooped. Tad stood in the middle of the table and stomped her webbed feet as she shrieked Zef’s name. Zef blew her kiss, making the Anura scream louder.

Struggling to catch their breath, Zef spoke into the microphone, introducing The Madame, and the audience roared with approval as the hulking Orc, with rippling muscles, long fiery hair, and tusks jutting out from her upper and lower jaws waltzed onto the stage. She’d somehow managed to squeeze herself into a corset bodysuit, and Toni winced as he imagined how tightly she must be tucked right now.

He’d never tucked himself, but he’d had the misfortune of walking in on Gem while he was trying to tuck. It had scarred Toni mentally. And emotionally. And honestly, a little bit spiritually. What with all the wriggling, barbed prehensiles, and Gem complaining that even his internal sperm sacks were getting squished. It was not a fond memory for either of them.

After greeting the crowd and telling them to give Zef another hand, The Madame started to sing in a deep, guttural voice. The back-up dancers began their new routine, allowing Zef to slip back behind the curtain without garnering attention. From the corner of his eye, Toni watched Oliver and Jude cheer, the stage lights reflecting in their eyes.

Now that Zef’s set was done, Toni stood to head back to the bar for another round of drinks. He motioned at Gem to come help—he had six fucking hands, after all—but the Araknis waved at the bodies boxing him in on either side, then splayed his hands, looking far too innocent.

Much to Toni’s annoyance, Rusty caught the exchange and rose to his feet. “Need a hand?” he asked in that husky tone, not raising his voice all that much, knowing Toni could hear him anyway, even with The Madame crooning into her microphone.

“Sure,” Toni said with a nod, since the Pyclon’s hearing wasn’t as keen as his.

They made their way to the bar and ordered more drinks. Rusty didn’t talk to him, which suited Toni just fine. A Rhopa passed behind them, and Rusty snarled, spinning around and yanking his tail out of their grasp. Their wings fluttered as they laughed, giving the Pyclon an appreciative onceover. Baring his canines, Rusty wordlessly made his position clear, and Toni couldn’t not back him up. Just because Rusty was an asshole, didn’t mean Toni would stand by and watch people treat him bad.

So, Toni shoved the Rhopa away, nearly making them lose their balance, and flashed his sharp teeth in warning. Offended, but not courageous enough to face him down, they slunk off, and Toni returned his focus to the bar where their drinks were being placed.

“I had it handled,” Rusty muttered sullenly. “I didn’t need your help.”

“Well, you’re welcome for it anyway,” Toni said with a sharp grin, and Rusty scowled. “Grab the rest, won’tcha?”

Without awaiting whatever juvenile response Rusty would have given, Toni headed back to the table with several drinks in hand. Rusty followed with the rest, and Toni could feel the glare of those pale pink eyes on the back of his head. It made him want to laugh.

Rusty was nearly a head shorter than him and the color of a child’s dream princess castle. He was practically a plushie. Not exactly the picture of intimidation. And Toni could tell it bothered him. Which meant it brought Toni endless entertainment because Toni was a petty bitch.

It was nearly the halfway point in The Madame’s set by the time Toni and Rusty returned with the second round of drinks. To avoid any further embarrassment, Toni did not instigate conversation with Jude, though he did hand the human his new glass with a smirk and a wink.

Jude rolled his eyes a little, but he smiled back, casting Toni a few side glances as he sipped his drink. Which meant Toni still had a chance of salvaging this.

Halfway through The Madame’s set, the music faded, and the Orc addressed the club. She was speaking Hellia, of course, and Toni heard Gem translating as quickly as he could for Oliver and Jude’s benefit. She scanned the crowd, green eyes locking on their table. She grinned lasciviously and pointed at Jude.

“You there,” she rumbled in English. “Human in the hideously divine shirt.”

Jude paled and pointed to himself.

“Yes, darling, you. Come up here.”

With a flush to his face, Jude exchanged a nervous smile with Oliver as he climbed over him and Gem to escape from the booth. Toni stood and offered him a hand, and Jude took it. His hand was warm and soft, and Toni liked how small it looked in his.

“Good luck,” he said as he pushed Jude toward the stage.

Jude subtly flipped him off before he joined The Madame on the stage.

“And what’s your name, morsel?” she crooned down at Jude, having to bend over to eliminate the massive height difference.

“Uh, I’m Jude,” he said, making the mic squeal a bit.

“And where are you from?”

“Chicago.”

“Oh, Chicago. I went there on my third honeymoon. Practically destroyed the presidential suite in the Hyatt, didn’t we, my dear?” The Madame cackled as she wiggled her fingers at a skinny Septopod half her size.

“We sure did, baby!” he chimed as the audience oohed and ahhed.

“Dear god, I hope he’s the top,” Oliver said, and Toni choked on his drink.

Thankfully, no one noticed Toni asphyxiating as The Madame continued, “So what brings you to my club tonight?”

Pointing at Oliver, Jude said, “My best friend Oliver invited me. He works with Zef in Purgatory.”

“Oh, isn’t that precious,” The Madame purred, running a massive hand over Jude’s curly hair. “Are you enjoying yourself?”

“Hell yeah, this is the coolest thing I’ve ever done, and I cut my own tits off.”

The Madame boomed a laugh as Jude beamed, clearly pleased with himself as the audience laughed and cheered.

“He cut his tits off?” Toni asked Oliver. “He had tits?”

Oliver nodded, shifting uncomfortably. “Um, yeah.”

Toni furrowed his brow. “Why’d he cut them off?”

Oliver hesitated, and he was saved from answering as The Madame’s chuckles died off and she spoke again. “Well, Jude, I thank you for your patronage. Before you go, would you like to do a shot off my breasts?”

The Madame’s tusks gleamed under the lights as Jude flushed to the tips of his round ears. But still, he nodded, leaning in to speak into the mic. “It would be my honor, ma’am.”

“Ma’am? Oh, what a charmer,” she purred. “Do be careful, nugget, or I might steal you away to my dressing room after the show.”

“I think you’d split me in half. Respectfully,” Jude squeaked, and the Orc guffawed.

“Charm and flattery. My poor heart can’t take it!” The Madame pressed the back of her hand to her brow dramatically. “And if I promised to be gentle?”

For the first time, Jude looked genuinely alarmed. “Uh, well, I suppose, there are far worse ways to die.”

“You silver-tongued devil,” she gasped. “Are you quite sure you’re human and not an Incubus?”

Jude laughed. “Yes, ma’am, quite sure.”

“I just want to gobble you right up, but I’m a lady, and I’ll restrain myself.” She waved a hand at one of the servers, who rushed over with a shot of something bright pink and bubbling. “Bring it quickly, dear, before I devour him right here on the stage.”

“Leave some for the rest of us,” Toni shouted, and the crowd laughed. Oliver punched Toni in the shoulder, barely missing his fin. Jude shot him a chiding, half-hearted glare. Toni waggled his brows in response.

The audience cheered as The Madame took the shot from the waiter and nestled it between her ample bosom. To his credit, Jude didn’t hesitate. He popped onto his toes as the Orc bent down as much as she could without spilling the shot.

Oliver cheered, and Toni whistled. Gem started chanting Jude’s name, and the rest of the crowd took up the call. Entire head flushed in embarrassment, Jude buried his face in The Madame’s breasts and closed his mouth around the shot glass, then tipped his head back and swallowed it.

The crowd brayed their approval, even as Jude coughed and sputtered. The Madame ate up the praise, thanking Jude for his good humor and sending him off the stage with a jovial slap to his ass. It nearly toppled the human down the stairs, but Toni scrambled out of his chair and grabbed his arm to steady him. Grinning loosely, Jude waved at the cheering crowd and allowed Toni to guide him back to the booth.

“I don’t know what was in that shot,” Jude said to Oliver as everyone scooted in to make space for him at the end of the booth. “But it was strong.”

Oliver laughed and clapped him on the shoulder. Jude took a gulp of his whiskey sour. Now that they were technically sitting next to each other—Jude at the end of the booth, Toni in his chair—Toni could more easily study him. He was short, shorter than Rusty even if Toni had to guess, with a darker complexion than Oliver.

Feeling a little creepy, Toni dropped his gaze to Jude’s flat chest. It looked like a normal chest to him, but what did he know about humans? Sure, he’d seen human porn, so he had a basic grasp on human anatomy, but he wasn’t an expert.

He thought breasts were only for human females, but Jude was definitely a guy, given his pronouns and stuff. So maybe human genders weren’t so cut and dry. Which made sense. There were plenty of Hellian species with more than two genders, and some species with only one. There were even species that changed or chose their gender, depending on the needs of the community or personal gender identity.

Toni glanced at Tad. He hadn’t known her as an Anurlet, so she’d always been female to him. But she’d had to choose her gender when she hit puberty, like all Anura did. Maybe humans were the same way.

Wanting to know for sure, Toni stretched out his leg and nudged Jude’s knee. The human glanced his way out of the corner of his eye but didn’t turn to face him. Instead, he took another sip and focused on the stage where The Madame was wrapping up her set.

Annoyed at being ignored, Toni said, “Pst, Jude.”

Jude bit his bottom lip but still didn’t face him.

With a growl, Toni nudged Jude’s leg again, making the human huff in exasperation before turning toward him. “Can I help you?”

Balancing on the back legs of his chair, Toni couldn’t help but give the cute, little human a flirtatious onceover. “Trust me, baby, I think you can do more than help me.”

“Ew,” Oliver whined from his spot beside Jude.

Dark brows rose into the curls falling over Jude’s forehead. “Is that so?” He returned the onceover, and Toni felt every inch of it like a physical touch. It made the fins on his arms flutter. Unfortunately, Jude looked much less impressed with what he found than Toni hoped. “You look to me like the kind of guy that can help himself.”

Toni hissed between his teeth. “Now why you gotta go and wound me like that?”

Jude smirked, eyes dancing with mirth. “Honestly, I think a check to your ego will be good for you. Think of it as a teaching moment. You know, for personal growth.”

Oh, this human had spunk. Toni liked that; he liked that a lot. “Well, sweetheart, I think you’ll find I’m a very eager student. For the right teacher, that is.”

“I am so uncomfortable right now,” Oliver muttered morosely.

Ignoring him, Toni swirled the liquid in his glass, never breaking eye contact with Jude as he added, “And you’ll be impressed with all my growth , I promise.”

Oliver grimaced. “Dude, gross!”

Jude, on the other hand, burst into laughter, and Toni preened, taking a swig of his drink. It burned all the way down, settling hot in his belly.

“Wow, that was—wow,” Jude took a sip of his whiskey-sour. “I can tell you’re gonna be about as subtle as a bulldozer.”

“I don’t know what a bulldozer is. Is it sexy?” Toni waggled his brows, bringing another chuckle from Jude.

“Sure,” he said.

“Then I’m a bulldozer, baby,” Toni said haughtily, and Jude shook his head and rolled his eyes. But he was smiling, and it made Toni feel things. And not just dick things. Other things. Like, feeling things.

“You’re something alright,” Jude said, though it didn’t sound like an insult. It didn’t sound like a compliment either, but Toni would roll with it.

“Can I ask you something?” Toni rested his arms on his knees, raising his voice so Jude could hear him over The Madame’s closing number.

Eyes a little glazed from the alcohol, Jude leaned closer. “I guess so.”

“Do all humans choose their gender?” Jude looked taken aback at the question, and Toni grimaced. “Shit, I just asked something inappropriate, didn’t I? Sorry about that. Never mind, you don’t gotta answer.”

“No, it’s fine,” Jude said, bringing his glass to his lips and tipping the contents back, swallowing it all in one go. Setting the tumbler down, he faced Toni, expression guarded. “We, I mean humans, don’t choose our gender. Do demons?”

“Some do. Tad did.” Toni pointed at Tad. “Anurlets are genderless until they hit puberty, then they choose. And other species can change it up if they want.”

“They can change their gender just like that?” Jude asked, looking almost envious.

Toni shrugged, the alcohol working its way through his veins until a pleasant buzz took residence there. “I mean, yeah. I’m sure more goes into it, of course, but it’s like an evolutionary thing, you know? Like back when survival of the species was all that mattered. So, you get a community with too much dick, and everyone’s losing their minds. Like, how we gonna make babies with all this dick!”

Jude frowned, blinking slowly like he was having trouble following Toni’s logic.

“So then, they gather some of the dick together, and they’re like, ‘Go change and have a baby,’ or whatever.” Jude laughed, and Toni frowned. “Don’t look at me like that. I’m no scientist! I don’t know how it works. I just know that one day, Jeta wasn’t Jeta no more. Jeta was Jimi. Which was a-okay by me, baby.

“Jeta was hot. Jimi was also hot. He fucked me in the swimming pool locker room.” Toni sighed. “It was only okay. But not because of me. My skills were flawless.”

“Mhm?” Jude hummed, brows furrowed deeply. “Maybe this is the alcohol, but I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“I’m a little lost myself, if I’m being honest,” Toni admitted, swirling the contents of his tumbler as Jude laughed loudly into his palm. “The moral of the story is that my skills are flawless.” He flashed his teeth. “And I’ll be willing to prove that anytime you want.”

Leaning closer, Jude grinned drunkenly, his words a little slurred as he said, “You’re sexy and frightening.”

And fuck if that didn’t make Toni swell with pride. “Oh, baby, you ain’t seen nothing yet.”