Page 6 of Find Me Again (KRK Security #3)

Then

The fall was firmly upon them and it was getting too cold to stay up on the hill for long, but they were both unwilling to admit that just yet.

Ryan tucked the blanket tighter under his thigh while trying not to tug it off of Neil, who was sitting next to him at the back of Ryan's truck. They were pressed closely against each other to share the heat, which was doing scientifically impossible things to Ryan's heart, but he tried to ignore it.

He'd learned to ignore a lot of things by now, ever since he'd understood what those weird feelings he'd started to have around Neil meant. Suppressing them wasn't always easy—like right now, when a different kind of heat was making its presence known low in his belly—but Ryan had resigned himself to live with it.

He didn't have a choice, after all. There was no way he'd risk their friendship for anything, no matter how tempting it sometimes was to reach out and—

No .

Needing a distraction, Ryan turned to Neil, only to find him staring at the valley before them, the trees changing colors into vibrant red and yellows amidst all the green.

"What's with you today?" He nudged Neil with his elbow. "Did something happen at the practice?"

The hockey varsity team had a big game tomorrow, so there'd better not been any last-minute drama.

"Nothing bad." Neil shook his head, glancing at him briefly. "We went through the game plan and we're ready, all we need is not to choke tomorrow. Which we won't," he added right away, sounding confident, but Ryan didn't miss the way he was wringing his fingers on his lap.

"You haven't choked since your second game ever last year," Ryan reminded him. "You're going to be fine."

"If we win this, we have a real shot at the state championship. We need better than fine."

"I know, I know. You've been doing great the whole season, though, so your chances are good. Besides, you have the home game advantage. And I'm going to be screaming my face off in the stands, so, you know. You need to play at least as good as my cheering will be."

Neil snorted. "Will there be pom poms?"

"Nope. I'll only bring pom poms for your Stanley Cup finals, nothing below that."

"High bargain."

"Gives you something to strive for, doesn't it?"

Ryan grinned at the burst of laughter he'd finally gotten out of Neil, but when he turned to him again, he froze, suddenly unsure. Neil's laugh cut off as he stared at Ryan, whose heartbeat kicked up a notch.

"Hey, can I try something?" Neil whispered, untangling his hands.

Ryan nodded, confused his friend would even ask, but then Neil closed the small gap between them, put his hand in Ryan's hair, and kissed him.

Neil kissed him.

On the mouth.

Ryan had very little idea of what to do— more of that —or say— yes, yes, yes —but it only took him a split second to kiss Neil back.

It was softer than he'd ever imagined. And slower. They started and stopped, and then started again, and it took a while before either of them even opened their mouths to deepen the kiss.

Damn , it was good.

For all that Ryan had kissed a few girls, it had never, ever felt like this. After the initial uncertainty, Neil grew more sure, more demanding, and Ryan wanted nothing more than to let him do whatever he desired. The grip Neil had on his hair and the way he pushed his tongue into Ryan's mouth made Ryan hard in record time, and he gasped into the kiss.

Then he wound his arm around Neil's waist and pulled him in, only for them to draw back and inhale sharply as their erections rubbed against each other.

Neil's eyes were shining, his mouth wet, and his hand moved to the back of Ryan's neck, which was apparently a very, very sensitive part of his body.

"Do you want—?" Neil whispered hoarsely, dropping his gaze to Ryan's lips.

Yes. Anything .

"Yeah," he murmured, toes curling in anticipation. "Yes."

Next thing he knew, Neil rolled him onto his back and propped himself up on his elbow as he lay half on top of Ryan.

Despite the cold, hard surface under his back, it felt almost too good. Like whenever Ryan had to wait before jacking off and then finally grabbed his erection—the relief, the pleasure, and the hint of pain all in one.

Neil rolled his hips, and a quiet gasp escaped Ryan's mouth as he clasped his hands on Neil's lower back before sliding them to rest on his sides. To hold on.

Neil leaned in for another kiss, this time slick and demanding. I'll take it from there , he seemed to be saying, just come with me on this ride, come on .

As if Ryan would say no to that.

As if he hadn't been dreaming about it for months.

Soon enough, they were both rolling their hips, rutting against each other and kissing or panting into each other's mouth. Everything was heightened—the sounds, the taste, the sparks running all over Ryan's body, harder, faster, more—and when the orgasm hit, he whined into Neil's mouth, coming in his boxers because they hadn't even opened their jeans for this.

Neil bit his shoulder as he came a moment later, shuddering until he collapsed, spent, and warm, and increasingly heavy as the seconds ticked by.

Ryan didn't mind the weight, though. Not at all.

He stared at the sky, unblinking.

This really happened. It wasn't a dream, it wasn't a fantasy. It had happened.

Neil had kissed him, they kissed some more, and then they came. Together.

Neil had kissed him .

The guy in question rolled off onto his back, and for a second, Ryan was scared to look at him, to know what he was thinking.

But when Ryan did finally glance his way, Neil was right there, with a smile expanding into a grin, bright and happy.

Ryan grinned back.

Everything he wanted, right there.

They turned onto their sides to face each other, and Ryan ran his teeth over his lower lip, wondering what came next. Should they talk? Or could they just kiss some more, instead?

"You good?" he finally asked in a whisper.

Neil nodded. "Yeah. Yes. You?"

"Better than." Ryan's cheeks were starting to hurt from all the grinning. "I'm great."

"Me too." Neil moved his hand next to where Ryan's was lying between them and hooked their pinkies together. "I'm great."

"Awesome."

"Yeah."

Swallowing his laughter down, Ryan leaned in and kissed Neil again, lingering there for a minute or two.

"I know we have to go soon, but— Can we stay for a bit longer?" Neil whispered, tugging their joined hands under the blanket and closing his eyes.

"Sure."

Whatever you want .

Neil's hum was his only answer, and Ryan settled in to watch him, his heart overflowing with everything that had been hidden for so long and was now suddenly pushing its way out of the dark.

He couldn't wait to find out how to be in this new way with Neil, on top of everything else they were, and did, and had with each other. They shared almost everything, outside of hockey, and now there was this new, amazing thing for them to have.

And there was no better person to figure things out with than his best friend.

That part had always been true, no matter what.