When Jack found out Zeph was receiving cancer treatment, he was devastated. It was like being caught up in the explosion all over again. He was overwhelmed by shock, fear, helplessness. He wanted to go to Zeph, be with him, but Thomas persuaded him otherwise.

But Jack didn’t always listen to Thomas.

When he was sent to do a job in Estonia, he stopped in Cambridge on his way to the airport.

Not on the way at all, but he didn’t care.

He’d managed to catch sight of Zeph as he sat receiving his chemotherapy and his heart had hurt in a way he’d not experienced before.

Thomas had worried that seeing Zeph would be a distraction. In fact, it made Jack more determined to do every job efficiently so he could see Zeph again.

And he did. Several times. But he never let Zeph see him.

He had to let him go, but he couldn’t.

He wanted to stop working, but he couldn’t do that either.

If he stopped swimming, he’d drown.