Page 13

“Maybe he’d like me to massage him. I could ask the masseur to show me how to do it. I’d hide the syringe in the fold of my…that towel.”

“Peshtemal.”

Jack nodded. “Or you could have the masseur called away and I could take his place. Manipulating the right spot on Kubat’s neck would hurt enough to distract him from feeling the needle going in.

Or I go with the flow and seize whatever opportunity presents itself.

That might include leaving the hamam with him, letting his driver take us somewhere and, on the way, he has his heart attack. ”

“No going with the flow. Right. Now let’s plan properly.”

Thoroughness could save Jack’s life, the slightest detail could make the difference at a crucial moment, so he paid close attention as Thomas talked.

Their histories needed to be perfect. Since they’d already been to Türkiye and used alternate identities, it was straightforward.

Jack was sure Thomas had taken him on that trip last year with exactly this in mind.

He’d been Thomas’s son then, and he’d be the same this time.

Thomas had already booked a hotel. Now he booked their spots at the hamam.

If Kubat failed to show, then Thomas had a plan of his own that he didn’t share with Jack.

“Do you need me to source the succinylcholine?” Jack asked.

“Not this time.”

Thomas had already known it was what Jack would come up with. Not a surprise.

They spent the rest of the day practising their Turkish, acting out the killing and discussing the way to recognise a good carpet. Alex was accompanying his father, Michael, to learn the business.

By the time Jack went to bed that night, his head was buzzing.

Amidst all the detailed preparation was the knowledge that this weekend a man would die and Jack would be responsible.

Kubat might be a bad guy… Well, he was a bad guy, but it was still unreal.

All this time, all this work he’d done to make himself into someone who could do this and now he had to do it.

What would Zeph think if he knew? Would he be horrified or…impressed?

Pointless conjecture because he’d never know.

Jack still wondered.

When Zeph was the last to arrive for registration, Jack saw Mr Andrews frown at him.

Not late but almost. Zeph kept his head down and shuffled to his seat.

Uh-oh. Now what? Jack had thought Zeph would wait for him after registration and they’d walk to computer studies together but he bolted off and instead, Jack found Alice waiting at the door.

“Hi, Jack.” She smiled at him. “Did you enjoy the party?”

He nodded. “Thanks for inviting me.”

She walked down the corridor alongside him. Jack was uncomfortably aware of what Zeph had told him about her, but he didn’t want to be unkind.

“Was there a lot of mess?”

“Georgia and I spent ages cleaning up.”

Jack knew who he believed.

“You left early,” Alice said.

“My uncle had something he needed to do so he had to fetch me.”

“You could have stayed the night.”

Oh God.

“Not in my room or anything.” She forced a laugh. “We don’t know each other well enough for that… Yet.” Another laugh. More forced than the last. “Would—”

“Alice, I’m not looking to go out with anyone. I don’t want you to think that I—”

“Of course not.” Her smile was too bright. “Friends, right?”

No, not friends. But he said nothing.

They’d reached the computer room and Jack held the door open for her. Zeph was already in his seat. Jack dropped down between the two of them. Zeph didn’t even acknowledge his presence.

“You okay?” Jack whispered.

He clearly wasn’t. There was a vivid bruise on his cheek and his glasses didn’t hide the dark circles under his eyes. Zeph looked at Jack, then down at his keyboard and touched the N and O keys.

The teacher started speaking. They were required to team up on a coding exercise and Alice was tapping Jack’s arm.

“Shall we work together?” she asked.

“I’m working with Zeph.”

Her face fell but Jack knew he’d done the right thing. Except when he shifted his chair over to screenshare, Zeph looked even worse than he had a few moments ago.

Jack tapped What’s wrong onto the screen.

Zeph deleted it and typed I can’t tell you now. At lunch? Manor Park by the swings. Meet you there. I brought you a peanut butter sandwich. Then he deleted it.

Jack wrote OK.

Zeph was already waiting when Jack arrived in the park. Zeph jumped off the swing, walked over to a bench and Jack joined him.

“Sorry to be a bit MI5ish.” Zeph handed him a sandwich.

“Who hit you?”

“My dad.”

Shit. “Why?”

“It doesn’t matter.”

“Of course it fucking matters. What are you going to tell me? He didn’t mean to hit you? Said he was sorry?”

“He wasn’t sorry. He meant to do it.”

“You should have called me.”

“No phone. I had it taken off me along with my old one. You better block my number in case my dad calls. He won’t know it’s you. I used 7850, not your name.”

“The density of steel in cubic metres.”

Zeph smiled.

Jack took out his phone and blocked Zeph’s number.

“What did you store me under?” Zeph asked.

“Trouble with a capital T.”

Zeph chuckled.

“Tell me what happened,” Jack said.

Jack was furious by the time Zeph had finished. If he’d been able, he’d have made Zeph’s father pay for what he’d done.

Zeph had taken one bite out of his sandwich and crushed the life out of what was left.

“I didn’t think I’d ever given him a reason to think I was gay,” Zeph whispered.

“Are you?”

Zeph’s exhale was so long, it seemed as if he’d never inhale again. Zeph faced Jack square on, then said, “Yes. I’m gay.” Then he shuddered and closed his eyes. “Has the world ended? Am I about to get washed away by a tsunami? Struck by lightning? Spat at by you?”

Jack stayed silent.

Zeph opened his eyes again. “Okay. None of the above. When you met me, did you think— oh he’s gay ?”

Jack didn’t know the right thing to say, so he kept quiet.

“Maybe I should be asking—do you mind that I’m gay?”

He knew the answer to that. “No.”

Zeph’s shoulders relaxed a little. “You’d think over the last couple of decades that people would have grown more tolerant and I suppose many have, but that’s worsened the behaviour of those entrenched in hatred of anyone different.

” Zeph sighed. “Don’t worry that anyone will think you’re gay because you talk to me.

My family object to me being friends with you because they imagine it’s stopping you going out with Alice. Don’t look for logic. There is none.”

“I’d never go out with her.”

“They’re overprotective. Alice has had a rough time. She’s in Georgia’s shadow. It’s hard having a sister who’s pretty, clever and popular. Though I don’t know why Georgia’s so popular because she’s an arse at home.”

“So what now?”

“My dad was waiting for the opportunity to confront me about being gay. Now he has. And now I know how he feels about it. One step out of line and he’ll throw me out.”

Shit! “Is there some reason why he feels as he does?”

“His brother, my Uncle Martin, was once his sister. Their parents refused to accept he was trans and my dad sided with them. They’re dead now, but Dad and Uncle Martin don’t speak and I’m not supposed to have anything to do with him.”

“But you do?”

“Yes.”

“What are you going to do?”

“What would you do?”

“I’d leave home, but you’re not me. Do you want to stay in the closet and not rock the boat for the next two years until you go to university?”

“In an ideal world, no. Can I ask my first question again? Did you think I was gay? Scott and Rufus call me princess but that’s just their way of being mean. They’ve never been openly homophobic, not really.” Zeph paused. “So…did you think I was gay?”

“I hoped.” He stared at Zeph, wondering if he dared kiss him.

Then Zeph smiled, a big bright smile. One that Jack couldn’t resist. He reached out and as he pressed his fingers to the back of Zeph’s neck, Zeph released a shuddering sigh. Jack leaned in and kissed the rest of the air out of Zeph’s lungs.