Page 37 of Enough Isn’t Everything (Everything Trilogy #1)

Chapter Twenty-Six

THIS HAS TO STOP

Iheld my breath as I waited to see what he did next. I was scared to move in case he thought I was giving him a green light to do it. Still pinned by my hips, Alfie held me in place. I swallowed hard and licked my lips because they were so dry.

Alfie bit his bottom lip again in response.

His arms were slightly trembling, and I was distracted by this and almost leaned into him, but I eventually managed to squeak out, “No.” Shit, I was disappointed with how weak and pathetic my voice sounded.

I couldn’t even convince myself, so how the hell was I going to convince him?

Raising an eyebrow at me, he moved closer, until his lips almost touched mine, his forehead slightly brushing mine. He licked his lips slowly. Kiss me, I thought.

I couldn’t move. Both of us breathed unevenly and his hot ragged breaths wafted over my face.

Closing my eyes, I prepared myself for the fabulous rush of sensation his kiss always gave me but he abruptly pushed himself off the door and moved away from me.

Turning, he traced a fingertip down my cheek as he swept himself around the other side of the door, leaving me unable to think as he disappeared out of sight.

I stood breathless, exhaling through my nose, my legs shaking. My senses were battered from his touch, his smell, his aura, his devastating smile, and all the familiar sensations he stirred in me.

Alfie had made me ache for him again. I was so turned on and full of want for him, it engulfed my feelings of anger, frustration, sadness and loss.

What the hell did he want from me? Was he punishing me because I didn’t want to continue with our arrangement?

I wished at that moment that I wasn’t so attracted to him. But it was more than that. I felt a need for him that I hadn’t felt for anyone before in my life.

Somewhere along the line, I’d developed strong feelings for Alfie, which made him a dangerous sexual magnet for me. In my stunned silence, I became aware my cell had beeped. I had a text message.

Will: where did you go?

Lily: I’m in the building next to the car lot.

Will: stay there I’ll be right over.

Will ran toward me, his feet splashing on the saturated lawn, his hair still damp.

He looked in a better mood than when I first saw him this morning.

Smiling and breathless, he said, “Mandy has invited us over this evening, you up for that?” I nodded and wiped some water from his neck absentmindedly.

“Yeah, it’ll be nice just to hang out.”

Will looked a little embarrassed. “I don’t want Saffy to come, Lily.”

Looking concerned, I questioned him. “Will?” He shrugged, and sighed heavily, holding my gaze with a sad look.

“I just want a little space, Lily. It doesn’t make me a bad person, does it?

I just want to talk with people without accusations from her.

I’m not looking to do anything wrong.” I understood his frustration.

Sometimes it felt obtuse. We had found ourselves sneaking conversations with each other, on one occasion reverting to text messages to arrange a gig, because she was being ridiculous with her jealousy.

Squeezing his hand in support, I said, “You need to work it out. I don’t want to be stuck in the middle of this. Both of you are my friends.”

Giving me a small smile, he kissed my forehead with affection. “I knew you’d get me, Lily.”

During the day, we were very productive at college, working some great arrangements into our music. In the evening we went directly to Mandy’s from campus. She had a very cute ground floor condo with a small private garden.

A garden was the one thing I missed about living in an apartment block. Mandy’s parents had sold their family home, and bought this for Mandy, while they were working overseas.

She was a great little hostess and had made hotdogs, burgers, and salad. Will devoured as much as he could fit in his stomach. No doubt about it, the man enjoyed his food. I was in awe at where he put it all because there was not an ounce of fat on him.

Neil arrived, with a few other faces I vaguely knew, and we all sat on some stacking plastic patio chairs. The atmosphere was so relaxed, and conversations between us flowed easily. With all of us studying music, we had so much in common.

I felt happier than I had in weeks. When the doorbell chimed, I wondered who else could be coming, because most of our group was already here.

A strange sensation came over me and I felt Alfie’s presence before I saw him. Even though I had that feeling, I was still shocked when I looked up and saw him leaning in the patio doorway.

The effect he had on me when I saw him was incredible. Alfie stood there looking very cool with a beer in his hand, and his eyes scrutinized me.

My heartbeat was off the charts fast, and I was trembling as my body reacted to the mere sight of him.

Trying to continue the conversation I was involved in, I struggled, conscious of him watching me.

Will was sitting close to me, and as if on cue he turned and gave me a slow smile. I returned this automatically.

He began teasing me about something that had happened during one of our sessions and grabbed me playfully by the neck, pulling my head down and into his chest.

Everyone laughed, and Will squeezed me in a hug, saying, “Only kidding, you know I love you, Lily.” Alfie’s expression darkened, his brows furrowing. He looked unimpressed with both of us.

Alfie’s beautiful plump lips were drawn into a thin line as he stared at me. Shrugging this off because I thought that he’d be thinking that Will was my new ‘buddy’ in his sense of the word, I largely tried to ignore him.

Mandy came through and turned her attention to Alfie, asking him something about the gig he had just performed at. He was forced to shift his focus, leaving me free to move around without him being able to follow me.

She then went around picking up paper plates and placing them in a garbage bag, still talking to him. Mandy asked about the band he was opening for in a few days. I didn’t wait for his answer, pushing myself out of the chair, and using her distraction to make my way to the kitchen.

Will was right behind me, placing his hand on my shoulder. I tensed, but when I turned and realized it was him I smiled. “Sorry, I couldn’t resist telling them about that, it was too cute when you did it at the time.” He grinned, referring to the story he’d told.

His hand lingered on my shoulder, and Will began rubbing circles absentmindedly, while he was talking to me. I smiled widely at him and started giggling, because in hindsight, the story he was talking about had been funny.

It was nice that he made sure I was okay with him sharing the story. “It's fine, it didn’t bother me at all.” He cuddled me close in a bear hug, rocking me from side to side.

“You know it’s been lovely just to spend time with all of you without Saffy getting the wrong idea.”

Agreeing it had been nice, I still felt sad for Saffy. Pushing myself from Will’s chest, I had just broken the hug and he was still smiling at me, when Alfie appeared in the kitchen, waving his empty beer bottle between two fingers, and walking in our direction.

“You’re very tactile for ‘friends’.” He used quotation marks with his fingers on the word friends to accentuate his point. “Where do I find another one of these?” he asked, waved his empty beer bottle at us.

Will moved away from me, looking a little stressed by his comment, and ran his fingers through his hair. “There’s plenty in the box over there.”

Will motioned with his head and signaled by pointing at the patio door that he was going back to the garden. He walked away, leaving me alone in the kitchen with Alfie.

As I went to walk past him to follow Will, Alfie slammed the palm of his hand down on the counter.

It made me jump and effectively blocked me from leaving.

My heartbeat picked up pace, and my breathing was fast and shallow.

I tried to control the feelings of both excitement and dread at being so near to him again.

“Excuse me, I’d like to pass, please.” Alfie bent to make eye contact with me, and I inhaled his scent. I realized I had missed it.

“Is that what you really want?” He gave me a seductive half smile.

“You wouldn’t rather come back to my place and let me make you feel good, Lil?

” His use of the shortened version of my name made my breath hitch.

Just being near him did crazy things to my heart, and he stole my breath away every goddamn time he was in the room.

Pressing my hand to his hard chest I pushed him back. In my heart, I wanted to grab his T-shirt and pull him closer, not push him away.

“Stop it. I’ve had enough of your games. I don’t want you, Alfie,” I hissed, my eyes darting to the patio doors to make sure we weren’t being watched.

He grabbed ahold of one of my hands and placed it over his heart. As he reached out, invading my body space again, he placed his other palm over mine. It wasn’t a sexual touch. My voice may have been saying one thing, but my body couldn’t lie to him. My heart was pounding in my chest, as was his.

“Forgive me, but I’m hardly convinced by that.

We drive each other crazy with want.” Giving me a smug smirk, he nodded his head toward his palm.

He dipped his mouth to my ear and whispered to me, “I don’t think you’ve had nearly enough of me, sweetheart, and I know I’ll never get enough of you.

” Alfie’s soft breath fanned over my ear and my neck.

Smiling sexily at me, his eyes held that sensual gaze that usually melted me. He ran his small finger ever so lightly along my thumb, as he continued to hold my hand in his.

I flinched and tried to move it away, and he let his hands drop by his sides. He was right, of course. Alfie knew exactly what he did to me. Turning to walk away, I fought back tears, blinking rapidly.