Page 17

JESSE

3 WEEKS LATER

“I can’t take it anymore. What’s going on between you two?”

Jesse stopped in his tracks and turned to face Mom, who stood in the entrance of the kitchen, hands on hips.

“Vi,” Mom said sharply as Violet tried to escape into the hallway.

Violet halted but kept her back to them.

Mom looked back and forth between them before she demanded, “What happened?”

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Dad’s head turn from the TV. Unease tripped down Jesse’s spine, but he kept his face blank as Mom continued.

“From the moment you two came home from school until you went to sleep, you used to spend every moment together. I could hear you talking and laughing for hours, and now…” Mom swept her hands in the empty expanse between them. “You barely exchange a word. Isaac mentioned that disagreement you had a few weeks ago that made Violet so upset that she wanted to ride the bus?”

Mom shot Jesse a quizzical look, clearly expecting him to explain, but he remained silent.

“I thought you two worked it out, and we were all just busy—you, Jesse, with baseball, and Vi spending most of her time with Georgia and Allison because of that science project. But now, I know something’s wrong.”

Mom stopped, giving them the opportunity to confirm or deny her charge. Jesse slipped his hands into his pockets and gave Violet time to answer for both of them. He’d known this moment would come. It was only a matter of time before someone confronted Violet about her ghostlike appearance and the fact that she’d gone mute. Her fire, which had always been so much a part of her, had been extinguished.

Come on, baby. You can do it , he silently urged. He couldn’t stand the suspense. Every day he wondered if it was going to be his last of freedom. Every time a stranger appeared in his classroom doorway or at practice, he wondered if Violet finally plucked up the courage to do the right thing, only for each instance to be a false alarm that left him drenched in cold sweat. The emotional roller coaster was exhausting. He wanted his fate decided. Waiting for the axe to fall was intolerable.

“Jesse?”

The uncertainty in Mom’s tone sliced through his gut. Mom had always trusted him implicitly, but he glimpsed her bewilderment and a hint of apprehension. Had the incident with Tucker made Mom realize that she didn’t know him as well as she thought, which meant he could be responsible for Violet’s drastic personality change?

“Violet.”

At Isaac’s stern tone, Violet stirred. She turned, revealing a bloodless face and eyes so glassy and empty that Jesse looked away.

“Tell me this has nothing to do with Tucker,” Dad ordered.

“This has nothing to do with Tucker,” Violet parroted in a flat monotone.

Dad relaxed and glanced at Jesse. “You said you’d make it up to her.”

He cleared his dry throat. “I tried.”

Dad switched his gaze back to Violet. “That wasn’t good enough?”

Jesse tensed. “It’s not her fault. It’s mine,” he interjected swiftly.

Isaac’s focus didn’t waver from Violet. “I can’t recall the last time I heard you two argue, much less fight. What could Jesse have done to make you hold such a grudge?”

Jesse felt like his heart was being squeezed in a vice. It took every ounce of self-control he possessed not to fidget as he waited for Violet to respond, but she said nothing.

“Ephesians 4:26 says not to let the sun go down on your anger. You’ve let this go on for weeks,” Isaac said quietly. “The devil is always looking for an opportunity to come into a family and cause discord, to divide and conquer. There’s nothing Jesse could have done that can’t be forgiven.”

“Dad,” Jesse stressed, but Isaac ignored him and continued his lecture.

“Matthew 6:14 says if you forgive others, God will also forgive you. No one is perfect. Give Jesse grace, Vi, so one day someone will do the same for you.” Isaac paused a moment to let that sink in before he continued, “Jesse’s running to the church to pick up supplies for the work we’re doing on the McMillan’s house tomorrow. Go with him. Talk. Bury this once and for all. If you can’t resolve your issues, Mom and I will get involved, and we shouldn’t have to. You two are adults now. Act like it.” Isaac jerked his chin. “Go change, Vi. Jesse’s leaving in five minutes.”

When Violet didn’t move to obey Isaac’s order, the tension in the room thickened. Jesse sensed Violet wrestling with herself. His heart thudded in his ears as he waited for her to break her silence and condemn him. Isaac scooted to the edge of his seat, clearly ready to deal with this on his feet, but before he could, Violet abruptly turned on her heel and disappeared down the hallway.

As Mom watched her go with a concerned expression, Isaac’s hard gaze cut to Jesse.

“You’re always trying to protect her.” Isaac held up a hand to stop his protest. “I know my daughter better than anyone. She’s strong-willed, impulsive, and has a nose for trouble. Ever since Tucker, she’s changed, and not for the better. She needs accountability. What’s going to happen when you’re not around to save her?”

He opened his mouth to crush Isaac’s illusions about him and instead heard himself say, “I love her.”

“I know you do.” Isaac sighed as he leaned back in his recliner. “You’d do anything for her. She knows it and takes advantage.”

Isaac was an honorable, hard-working, practical man, but when it came to matters of the heart, he was blind. Because he embodied everything Isaac had always wanted in a son, Isaac couldn’t see his faults. On the flip side, when it came to Violet, Isaac discounted her good qualities and instead focused on the bad ones that reminded him of his first love that he’d never forgiven. How many times over the years had he defended Violet against a father, who was too hard on her and had never given her the grace he expected of her?

What would Isaac say if he confessed what he’d done? Isaac assumed because he loved Violet that he was incapable of truly harming her. He believed the same until she scorned his love and destroyed his illusions of a future together. He could set the record straight and clear her name. He steeled himself, but before he could speak, Violet reappeared.

She was dressed in black pants, a t-shirt, a light jacket, and a hat pulled low over her eyes. She didn’t say a word as she crossed the living room to where he stood by the front door. He opened it for her. As Violet trotted down the steps, he looked back. Isaac had gone back to watching TV, but Mom’s eyes were on him.

His mother was a glass half full, eternal optimist who believed that good would always prevail. She had a kind heart. He’d always thought of his mother as being somewhat naive, but as their eyes met, he realized the rose-colored glasses were missing and she looked… disturbed. Unlike Isaac, Mom wasn’t blind. She may love him more than life itself, but she also loved Violet with the same ferocity and, unlike Isaac, she would believe Violet in a heartbeat. He flashed her what he hoped was a reassuring smile before he turned away, his stomach in knots.

It wasn’t until he unlocked the truck that it struck him. He stared through the window at Violet, who stood on the opposite side. They hadn’t ridden in this vehicle since that day. They couldn’t switch to the SUV because he needed the truck bed for the paint cans and lumber he had to pick up. He blew out a breath before he pulled the door open. Automatically, his eyes scanned the interior, even though he’d thoroughly cleaned it. He turned the key in the ignition and waited.

It took Violet several minutes to open the door, and a few more before she actually got in. As she settled beside him, he sensed her reluctance, resentment, and the smallest trace of fear. He didn’t blame her. He hadn’t known he was capable of what he’d done in that field.

They rode in absolute silence. Despite Dad’s decree that they sort this out, Violet didn’t try. Both of them knew nothing could fix this.

He slumped in his seat and tilted his head back while keeping his eyes on the road. Violet was right beside him, but her presence was so faint, it was almost like she wasn’t there at all. She’d become a wraith, drifting through life, lost in her head. Even though she loathed him, the urge to reach out and touch her, to bridge the distance between them, was a gnawing, dragging compulsion that made him tighten his hold on the steering wheel.

He hadn’t touched her since the day they visited the bluebonnet field. Not even a stray brush of his fingers while passing her a plate at dinner. He knew if he did, he wouldn’t be able to stop himself from taking more, and he’d taken enough.

You think if it felt so good, if we were meant to be, that I would spend an hour scrubbing my body every time you touch me and still never feel clean?

The memory of her voice, filled with venom and revulsion, tore through him like shrapnel, reopening wounds that hadn’t even begun to heal. He wholeheartedly believed Violet loved him and, at some point, would surrender to what was between them. It never occurred to him that their bond could fracture beyond repair or that, one day, she would look through him as if he wasn’t there.

How had he misjudged her feelings for him so badly? Had he imagined her eyes following him months before she gave herself to him? Had he convinced himself she desired him when she didn’t? He straightened and raked his hand through his hair as he shifted restlessly in his seat. No. It hadn’t been all in his head. She kissed him , which tipped their relationship into the physical realm. And before the reality of their circumstances tainted what they had, Violet had given herself freely, eager to experience any and everything he could offer her. The memories of her initiation and the handful of days where they experimented to their heart’s content reassured him that it wasn’t all in his mind, even as it tormented him with what was forever out of his reach.

When their bodies writhed together and the crap from the outside world faded away, what bloomed between them was so special, he vowed he would do whatever it took to keep it. So, he’d ignored her struggles, denials, and breakdowns. Ignored her babbling about all the reasons why they couldn’t be together. He tried to give her time and space to come to terms with what was between them, but the more he had of her, the more his appetite increased. The fact that her body wept for him, and she clung so tight in the throes, yet repeatedly rejected him, drove him insane. He assumed the constant imprinting on her body would overcome her reservations. He’d believed that in the end, love would conquer all.

How wrong he’d been.

“I feel nothing for you at all.”

Black spots marred his vision as rage engulfed him. He squinted at the road as he tried to think past the bloodlust. He lost his mind when she said that. When he realized she would never love him back. He built his life around her, and she wanted nothing to do with him.

She called him a monster, and he proved her right by giving his demon free rein. He punished her for not loving him back, for annihilating his dreams, and ruining the man he could have been. He mauled her like an animal, and she fought back with an aggression that, even now, made his dick hard. They had been stripped of all civilization, which resulted in a transcendent experience that unequivocally proved she was his equal. That field of wildflowers would always be his version of Eden and Violet, whether she wanted to be or not, was his wicked, savage temptress, Eve.

He glanced at her. She stared straight ahead, one hand loosely clutching the seatbelt resting on her chest. If she truly hated him, why hadn’t she reported him? She’d been given many opportunities to expose him, but she hadn’t. She claimed she didn’t want to break Mom’s heart, but Mom had nothing to do with how she let him tend to her when they came home that day or how she took what she needed from his body.

He took a deep breath and let it out slowly, ignoring the surge of adrenaline and the way his muscles flexed as his mind replayed her riding him. The only time Violet gave into their chemistry is when he roused her to a fever pitch, or she was too emotionally shattered to care about her scruples. Only then did she allow herself to indulge in their bond and allow it to soothe her.

The day after their violent clash, he visited the recruiter’s office to complete the enlistment process to join the Air Force. He’d put off making a final decision in hopes that Violet would come to her senses, but he was running out of time. Mom and Dad assumed he was going to a local college. He stopped talking about the military because it had upset Mom so much, but he hadn’t changed his mind. Joining the Air Force was a promise he made to his father that he always intended to keep. He had never second guessed his decision until Violet. If he went into the military, his life wouldn’t be his own. He drove to that secluded location, intending to lay himself at her feet and have her decide his future, only to be told in no uncertain terms that she wanted nothing to do with him.

Any man who had been as brutally rejected as he had, should have been instantly cured of his infatuation. To have the life of his life encourage him to have sex with other females and to label their relationship as poisonous and rotten should have made moving on a piece of cake. He ran a hand down his face, disgusted with himself. If he believed in witchcraft, he may have believed she cast a spell on him because he still yearned for her. She was a part of him, imbedded bone deep. There was no getting her out. He’d tried. There were countless girls who would have him, but the one he’d kill for hated his guts. He still loved her and a part of him suspected that he always would. His life was a cruel joke.

He pulled into the empty church parking lot and reversed the truck to make it easier to load the supplies. He sorted through the keys Pastor Sonny had given him as he approached the chapel and lifted his head when he heard a door slam. He paused as Violet rounded the truck and passed him to jog up the steps. He couldn’t resist staring at her ass and had a vivid image of her on all fours with the red outline of his hand on her right cheek along with a bite mark that had long since faded.

Need slammed into him with the force of a baseball bat. He’d taken great pains to steer clear of her. He’d been grateful that she caught rides with friends to and from school and had spent as much time as she could at their homes. It helped him wean himself off of her, to exercise self-control, but he was starkly aware that they were alone with no one around for miles on a late, quiet Friday afternoon.

His demon salivated and flashed erotic images in his mind, snapshots of their last, devastating encounter. Depraved desires snaked through his mind, edging out the pain of her rejection. He hesitated at the bottom of the steps. The reformed part of him wanted to order her to stay in the truck or, better yet, call their parents to pick her up. She wasn’t safe with him.

But he didn’t say a word. Instead, he made his way toward her, fingers tingling, heart racing. He knew what he was going to do. Maybe a part of him had known the moment she got in the truck with him. It was always going to end this way. If he was presented with the opportunity to have her, he didn’t have the will to resist. Even if it jeopardized his freedom. Even if it wrecked their family. Nothing compared to the absolute bliss of possessing her. He would pay any price to have her. To be buried inside of her where he belonged.

It didn’t matter if they ran the risk of being caught. He would take her anytime, anywhere. He didn’t give a fuck if it was in God’s house. If sex was all he could have of her, he would take as much as he could until she reported him, or someone put a bullet in his head. He was an addicted maniac. There was something terribly wrong with him for wanting someone who despised him. But he didn’t care. He’d take her hatred and disdain. He’d take her fighting. He’d take whatever she gave him as long as he got her .

He kept his eyes downcast, maintaining the role of chastened stepbrother. If Violet looked into his eyes, she’d know what was coming. There was a fine tremor in the hand that inserted the key in the lock and turned it. He pushed open the door and Violet stepped through. He watched her walk down the aisle between the pews. Cast in the light that came through the massive stained-glass windows, she looked ethereal, untouchable. No matter how many times he claimed her, she remained maddeningly out of reach.

Hands on hips, Violet surveyed the empty stage. What was she thinking? He gave the church a cursory glance. This is where their parents married and where they’d come nearly every Sunday for four years. He spent countless hours here praying, worshipping, volunteering. He spent a significant portion of his summer renovating this church… For what? To have God laugh in his face and take from him the only thing he’d ever wanted?

Fury heated his blood. He’d been a good son, taking care of his mother when his father died. He studied diligently for good grades, worked hard to attain his skills as an athlete and earned his money through manual labor. He didn’t cheat or steal. He had one dream. One weakness. One thing he desired above all else. He thought God placed Violet in his life because she was meant to be his, only for God to be one of the reasons Violet was convinced they couldn’t be together.

Violet had quoted every scripture about how God judged the sexually immoral, and how sex outside of marriage went against God’s design. He would have let Mom and Dad catch them in the act if he thought they’d force her to marry him. But he suspected their parent’s remedy would be to bury their indiscretion instead of trying to rectify it. They would be relieved to ship him off to the military and ensure they had no future contact with each other, which left him with no leverage to bind Violet to him.

God and Violet had been major pillars in his life. They guided and shaped him. He gave them his all only to walk away empty-handed and heartbroken, with his best friend and soul mate lost to him for all time. God had played him for a fool, tormenting him with false visions and hopes that would never come true. Didn’t God know what happened to faithful men who weren’t rewarded? They stopped praying and took matters into their own hands. If being the good guy didn’t get him what he wanted, what was the point of restraining himself?

He drew in a deep breath, taking in Violet’s powdery scent mixing with the smell of old Bibles, furniture polish, and wood pews. He didn’t have it in him to be gentle, loving, or patient any longer. He was desperate, deprived, and starving. With graduation just two months away and his ship date for the military pending, he had mere weeks left with her. He wasn’t going to abstain. He was going to gorge, knowing, no matter how much he indulged, it would never be enough.

As if Violet caught the tail end of his thought, her head whipped around. The moment their eyes collided, hers flared in instant recognition.

“You promised.”

Her voice was nearly soundless even in the hushed, quiet sanctuary.

“I’ve done my best.” His voice was gruff with lust. “I’ve never been able to keep my promises where you’re concerned. I can’t be around you and not…” He swallowed hard and extended his hand, palm out. “It won’t be like last time. I can be gentle.”

When she recoiled, his hand balled into a fist and dropped to his side.

“Don’t run,” he ordered, knowing it would trigger primitive instincts that he was trying to stifle. She deserved gentle. She deserved sweet. If she came to him, if she allowed him to touch without fighting, he could control his rampaging demon, but if she… His control vanished as Violet bolted down the aisle.

If the back door had been unlocked, Violet would have escaped. Instead, she wasted precious seconds fumbling with the lock and had to dash away before he could get his hands on her.

She leapt up the stairs, intending to cross the stage, to reach a door on the other side of the sanctuary, but she didn’t make it. He flattened her on the steps.

“You can’t do this here!” she hissed fiercely.

He was pleased her warrior spirit was back. That meant he didn’t have to rein himself in. He could indulge his demon’s appetite and give them an experience that would be etched into their memories for all time.

“Why not here? God already knows what we’ve done,” he said as he flipped her onto her back and unceremoniously yanked her pants down.

She engaged in a furious tug of war with him while simultaneously trying to keep an eye on multiple entrances. When he yanked hard enough to pull her down a step, she tried to kick him in the head, which allowed him to free one leg from her pants. That was all he needed. He ripped her maroon lace underwear off, forced her legs wide, and clamped his mouth on her pussy. Her breath whooshed out of her and her body went taut as a bow.

It had been weeks since he tasted her. Weeks since he’d been inside her. The moment his tongue sank inside her, he knew he was lost. He’d gone back to taking her underwear to get him off, but that paled in comparison to this. To drinking from her. To feeling her thigh muscles quiver as she strained to get away. To the honey that spilled from her against her will. Those tormented, helpless sounds she made were music to his ears. His awareness of their surroundings vanished. He didn’t care where they were or who tried to interrupt them. He wasn’t stopping unless someone physically hauled him off her.

He slid his finger inside her to coax her to spill a little more for him.

“Please, stop,” she begged as she hauled her quivering body up a step.

He followed, keeping his mouth on her while he felt around for her G-spot. He knew he found it when she let out a wanton moan that echoed around the sanctuary before she muffled it with her arm.

He lifted his head, eager for proof that she still needed this from him. She let out a stifled sob as he pushed her arm aside. She glared at him, eyes shining with self-loathing, lust, and hatred. She’d never looked more beautiful to him.

“You,” she began gutturally, but her voice cut out when he cupped her.

Her thighs snapped together, trapping his hand, which he didn’t mind in the least. As his fingers expertly stroked, her legs tossed back and forth.

“You’ve been missing me, Vi. Admit it,” he rasped.

“You’re a heartless…” She bared her teeth as she pulled herself up another step. “Evil.”

She collapsed on the stage and turned on her side in the fetal position. Mouth watering at the feast before him, he took his hand from her to undo his jeans. Violet shot up and tried to make a break for it, but he was on her in a flash. She didn’t gain more than three steps before he wrapped his arms around her and got her down on all fours. He put her in a chokehold as he blanketed her body with his.

“Nuh-uh, baby. You’re not getting away. I’ve gone too long without you.”

“Please don’t do this,” she pleaded.

“You want this so bad, you’re soaking my jeans,” he hissed as he rocked against her.

“We’re in church !”

She sounded scandalized.

He pressed his cheek to hers as they stared at the rows of empty pews. “It doesn’t matter where we are. I’ll always want you.”

He gripped her throat with one hand while the other undid his jeans and shoved them down.

“You know you want this,” he panted as he dragged his dick up and down her weeping slit. “Your body still craves me. Still wants me to fuck you senseless.” He nuzzled her as she let out a choked sob. “That’s exactly what you want me to do, isn’t it? Tell me that’s what you want, Violet.”

“You have no shame,” she croaked.

“You have enough for the both of us,” he mocked as he lapped up a stray tear. “How we feel about each other is nothing to be ashamed of. It’s supposed to be something we rejoice in.”

“The devil will say anything to make a sin seem like a gift,” she said bitterly.

So now he was the devil on top of being a monster. All because he loved her and wasn’t willing to lie about his feelings or hide how she made him feel.

“If the way of the righteous means I can’t have this…”

He gently thrust. It was so quiet, they both heard the sloppy sounds her body made. She whimpered in shame and tried to hang her head, but he wouldn’t let her, forcing her to face their invisible jury.

“Then I’ll be a sinner,” he said through clenched teeth and tried to hold back his beast, which wanted to slake his lust savagely, ensuring her submission and repentance. “I wish everyone could see you, dripping all over the stage, taking every inch of me. Loving every fucking moment of this. Whenever you come through those doors, and look at this stage, you’re going to think of this, of us.”

“No!”

She made a desperate lunge for the edge of the stage, but he held her in place. She wasn’t going anywhere.

“Pray for divine intervention,” he taunted as her vagina clutched at his invading cock. “If this is wrong, God will save you. He wouldn’t let His faithful daughter be defiled in His own house, would he?”

She reached back and gripped his thigh, fingernails raking his skin. “Stop! You can’t…”

He was so fucking tired of hearing her say that. He cut her off as he abruptly slammed himself inside of her, making her release a shrill scream that echoed around the chapel.

“I can’t what?” he whispered, fingers tightening around her throat as his demon howled in triumph. “I can’t fuck you in a church? I can’t make you want me?”

“I hate you!”

Her words skewered his heart. Despair and lust tangled in a devastating mix that decimated his control and his desire to be gentle. He abruptly straightened and gripped her hips.

“You better hope someone walks through that door and saves you,” he growled as he began to move in hard, brutal strokes that caused her whole body to jolt. “And puts us both out of our misery.”

He took what he wanted, what he needed, or he’d go insane. He didn’t hold back, couldn’t. Not after being so long without her. He dared God to take her from him, to deny him this after everything he’d sacrificed. He made Violet beg, cry, scream, and moan. He was certain this form of worship had never been practiced here, but he ensured if God was watching, it was memorable.

He wasn’t ready to come, but when she rippled around him, he almost went over the edge with her. He ground his teeth, fighting his response as she impaled herself on him, taking what she needed and shuddering in relief as he met her needs.

Unable to withstand another second, he flipped her on her back. He straddled her chest, knees pinning her arms on either side of her even though she was no longer fighting, but he wasn’t taking any chances. He gripped her cheeks and forced her mouth open. His jubilant shout echoed through the church as he spilled, as he defiled a place he’d once considered sacred, and accepted the fact that he was going to hell.

Violet stared up at him with glazed eyes. Needing to prolong the moment, he slid his dick in her mouth and released her cheeks. He was tense, waiting for her to bite, but he relaxed and stroked her hair when she sucked and let her tongue feather over the sensitive head.

“Good girl,” he husked.

That broke the spell. She went rigid beneath him and tipped her head to the side to expel his dick. She coughed and retched, but she’d already swallowed most of him, which is all he cared about. She began to buck and kick beneath him. He admired her for a few seconds before he rolled off her and collapsed behind Pastor Sonny’s wood podium.

Violet stumbled to her feet and wove drunkenly toward her clothes strewn on the steps, swiping at her face as she hastily dressed. He listened to her run out of the church and the loud bang as the heavy door slammed shut behind her.

He waited to be clobbered by those incipient emotions that had dogged him since he jacked off at church camp—shame, guilt, regret, remorse, fear, disgust. All he felt was warm satisfaction. Anyone could have come in and discovered them, but God hadn’t intervened. Maybe God hadn’t abandoned him after all.

His climax left him drowsy, but he had work to do. He forced himself to his feet and dragged his jeans up and fastened them. He made his way to a closet with cleaning supplies and grabbed a spray bottle and washcloth. He wiped up all signs of debauchery before he began to execute the task Pastor Sonny had entrusted to him.

When he made his way out to the truck with four paint cans, he saw Violet huddled in the front seat. She hadn’t been able to take off since he had the keys in his pocket and there was no one in the vicinity that she could ask for a ride. He propped the front door open as he loaded up lumber and the other building material they hadn’t used during the renovation. Tomorrow, they would be working on the McMillan’s house, members of the church who had a house in dire need of repair.

It took thirty minutes to load everything. By the time he joined Violet in the truck, the sun was beginning to set. He wasn’t surprised when Violet angled her body away from him. If she had allowed it, he would have drawn her against his chest and held her. He wanted to tell her he loved her, that it didn’t have to be this way, but he knew she wouldn’t listen.

He knew she was hating herself, hating him. That was her default whenever they came together. It didn’t matter how pleasurable and gratifying. She would always turn it into something amoral and twisted. She couldn’t admit that a part of her reveled in what they’d done.

As they made their way home, he wondered what Violet would say to their parents. Had fucking in church pushed her over the edge? Was that the final straw? He felt a burble of unease, but it couldn’t morph into true fear because of the overwhelming contentment that canceled out all else. His mind was empty, his inner turmoil gone. Possessing her in any capacity made him feel right, centered, whole. He refused to believe she didn’t feel the same. It wasn’t possible for such a connection to be one-sided. Their chemistry had been ordained by God. If she had loved him a fraction of how much he loved her, they could have conquered anything. Instead, she doomed them to lives where neither would ever be truly fulfilled.

When he pulled into the driveway, he glanced at Violet and waited to see if she had any last words for him before she decided his fate. She kept her face averted as she pushed open the door and hopped out. He ambled in her wake, hands in pockets.

As he expected, their parents hung around. Mom was still in the kitchen and Dad was in the living room. Both turned when they walked through the front door. Violet stopped in her tracks, clearly not anticipating this. He waited several seconds before he moved her inside so he could close the door.

“So?” Isaac prompted.

Mom came out of the kitchen, wiping her hands on a dish towel, her face still pinched with worry.

Violet was so rigid, she was trembling. He glanced down at her and saw her mouth open and eyes fill with tears.

“Violet?” Mom asked.

He curbed his arm around Violet’s shoulders and turned her into him a second before she burst into tears. His hand sank into her hair and kept her face pressed to his chest as he said, “She forgave me, but she’s still hurt and angry.”

Violet’s hand fisted in his shirt.

Mom’s expression eased slightly. “Forgiveness doesn’t take away the hurt, but it’ll pass.” Mom came up to them and rubbed Violet’s back. “Are you okay, honey? Want to talk about it?”

His hand dropped to Violet’s nape and squeezed. A second later, Violet shook her head.

“Violet helped me load up the truck. We’re a little dirty,” he said.

Mom nodded and stepped back. “Dinner will be ready in a half hour.”

He glanced at Isaac and got a curt, approving nod. Isaac was satisfied with his explanation and wouldn’t push Violet any further, for which he was grateful. He used his body to shield Violet from their scrutiny and ushered her down the hallway. He entered his bedroom since it was closer and directed her into the bathroom. Intending to get her in the shower, he started to lift her shirt without registering the fire in her eyes until it was too late. Her slap snapped his head to the side.

“You got what you wanted from me,” she seethed. “Now, get out.”

He ignored his throbbing face and reached for her. “It’s not like that. I wanted...”

She wrenched away, grabbed her hairbrush, and held it like a knife. “I know what you wanted! It’s the only thing you care about!”

“Vi.”

“I swear to God,” she choked. “If you touch me one more time, I’m going to lose it.”

He held up his hands. “Okay, I’m going.”

He backed into his bedroom. She closed the bathroom door and a second later, locked it. He stood there, face smarting, and heard the shower switch on to drown out the sound of her sobbing.

He leaned back against the door and closed his eyes. Those feelings he thought he bested came back with a vengeance, clobbering him over the head, drowning him in self-loathing. His chest swelled with the need to roar, but he swallowed it and staggered to his bed.

Even though he regretted the pain he caused, he knew that wouldn’t stop him from partaking in the future. If he had a shred of decency, he would put Violet out of her misery and turn himself in, but he wasn’t the self-sacrificing hero. Thanks to her, he’d finally embraced what he was. He wasn’t the knight in shining armor. He was the villain. What self-respecting monster willingly walked into a cage? If Violet wanted him out of her life, she had to declare what he was to the world. Until then, he was going to take his fill.

At some point, she would find the strength to turn him in. He wasn’t sure if that would be this evening over dinner or a month from now, but she would. If he wanted a chance at a future that wasn’t behind bars, he had to get the hell away from her. Having the military dictate his life was the best thing for him since he had no control where she was concerned. It was best that he leave before they destroyed one another.