Page 19 of Chasing My Bliss (Behind The Lens #6)

Felicity

I ’ve dreaded today since that mockery of a dinner two nights ago.

It’s only made worse by the fact Ezra has yet to message or call me.

He’s not even reading or accepting any calls from me.

Hell, I’ve had to hold myself back from using my key and just barging into his place.

Somehow, I don’t think that would impress him.

I miss him so fucking much. What’s worse is I have to do a live stream tonight. It should’ve been last night, but I wussed out and just couldn’t do it. Instead, I ate a whole container of cookies and cream ice cream topped with chocolate syrup.

“Get it together, Felicity, and get out of this pity party for one.”

Looking around, I’m sad. This is the only place I’ve known as home and now I’m leaving it. I always knew I would one day, but I just always took it for granted that it would always be here.

Now it’s not.

Just the thought of going to live in that house has my skin crawling.

Harry’s words hit too close to home. The way he was so excited to be in the room next to me had every raunchy frat boy movie rushing to the forefront of my mind.

Then there’s Calvin. While he seems nice, the controlling vibes he was letting off have me a little scared.

Add that to his slip in touching me how he did, and it’s got me a little scared to even be alone with him.

Me: Hey baby. It’s moving day.

Me: I miss you. I wish you would answer my call or texts.

Me: Please. Talk to me. Let’s fix us before it goes too far and we can’t come back from it.

Me: I really don’t want to live with my new step family. They’re weird.

Opening my mouth, I scream in frustration. Why won’t he talk to me? Should I just give up? He was the one that told me to be with a female. It’s not my fault I ended up having feelings. Enjoying the encounter. But I’m pushing that to the side, just so I can focus on the two of us.

I tug on the ends of my hair before typing another message to him. It’s going to be my last. If he doesn’t message back, I can at least move forward knowing that I tried.

Me: Just call me. Please. I love you.

I can’t stop the tears when they start falling. I hate this. How can we go from being happily in love, to him not even wanting to talk to me?

Checking the time, I see the movers are set to be here in like twenty minutes. It’s all the time I have before I’m forced into what will surely become a prison.

I tap my nails on the case of my phone. Thinking. Should I? Would I be sending the wrong signal? Is the offer even still open? So many questions and no answers.

Leaning back against the cushion, I close my eyes as I bounce my knee nervously.

“Screw it!”

Switching over to the text thread I’ve been avoiding, I let my fingers fly across the screen as I type out a message.

Me: I know you offered for me to stay with you. Is it still an option?

I hit the send button and just a few moments later, I see the tiny bubbles dancing on the screen, popping up and down. This could be her telling me hell no or answering my prayers.

Roxy: Of course it is. When are the movers coming?

Me: 15-20 min.

Roxy: Okay, here’s my address. Give it to them and have them put what you’re bringing here in last. The room is empty, so your bedroom stuff will fit.

Me: OK

Roxy: See you soon, roomie.

How the hell am I going to survive living with her? Especially being attracted to her. There’s no avoiding it now.

A second later, another text comes through with her address. Knowing there are some things I want to take myself, I start loading them into my car. My toiletries, a suitcase of clothing, the box with all my lingerie and other things I use on my live streams and lastly, my bookbag and laptop.

Everything else I can wait for them to bring. I’ve just put the last item into my car when the moving truck pulls up with a black Lexus RX350 right behind it. I’m still standing there like a bump on a log waiting for the movers to get out of the van when my mom and Calvin exit the Lexus.

Good. They can stay here with them, and I’ll make a quick escape to my new home.

“There’s my baby girl,” Mom shouts as she makes her way up to the porch and Calvin heads over to the moving van. “I can’t wait for us to be under the same roof again.”

My throat tightens, and my chest feels like it has a twenty-pound weight resting on it. I swallow hard. It’s now or never. The longer I wait, the harder it’ll be to tell her and I sure as hell don’t want to move my shit twice.

“Umm. So…”

“Honey, you’re stammering—just tell me what’s wrong. What is it?”

“I’m not moving into the house with you. I’m taking Roxy…” I catch myself and quickly correct it, “Roxanne's offer. It’s time for me to be on my own.”

“But financially?” Mom questions.

“I can handle it. I make enough money.”

“What do you make enough money for?” Calvin’s deep voice questions as he steps up beside Mom.

“Living on my own.”

His eyebrow raises in confusion. “I don’t understand. We had this figured out the other night. You’re quitting that diner and focusing on school while you live with us.”

Okay, it’s time I grow some lady balls and stand up for myself. I’m a damn adult and there’s no way someone who isn’t even blood related to me is going to dictate what I do.

“No,” I say forcefully. “It’s what you decided. Me, I never agreed to that. Roxanne offered me her spare room and I’m taking it. Can you have the drivers take my stuff to her place or do I need to get my own movers?”

It's one or the other of the options, but I’m not living in that house. Not with him and Harry. There’s no way I’d be able to go to bed at night without locking the door and putting something in front of it.

“I really think you should move in with us. I think both your mother and I would feel more comfortable if you were closer to us. Under our roof.” He reaches out, taking my hand in his, squeezing it as he rubs the pad of his thumb over my skin.

It feels wrong, and it’s making me sick. Yanking my hand away, I wipe it on my pants.

“Well, me and Roxanne bonded, and I want to live with her. I’m twenty-one, so I really don’t need permission. All I need to know is if the movers can do it or if I need to find my own.”

“You’re right, Felicity. I guess it’s just so hard to think of my baby girl all grown up.”

“Christine,” Calvin starts, but my mother quickly cuts him off.

“No, she’s right and I don’t see why we can’t have the movers deliver your items. Calvin, can you be a dear and let them know of the change of plans and give them Roxanne’s address for Felicity’s items?”

Calvin looks at her, waiting for her to change her mind, but she doesn’t. Reluctantly, he walks away, heading to the movers who are now out of the truck and unloading their hand trucks.

“What items are going to your new place?” Mom asks.

“Everything in my bedroom is going.” She gives me a hug and I can hear her sniffle, fighting to hold back her tears.

“Then I guess you need to run along to your new place and get to know your new step-sister. I’ll message you when the movers are on their way. I love you, Felicity, and I’m so proud of you. Just know you will always have a room at the new house should you change your mind.”

“Thank you.” I take one last look back at the old house and then head to my car, loaded down with the items I wanted to take myself.

Once I’m sitting behind the steering wheel, I send Roxy a quick message.

Me: I’m on the way. I have some boxes in the car and the movers will drop off the rest of my things later.

Roxy replies almost immediately, almost as if she’d been waiting anxiously for my message.

Roxy: I’ll order us some pizzas. See you when you get here.

I plug in the address to the app on my phone and set it in the center console where I can easily look at it. Turning the car on, I look up, seeing Calvin staring right at me. Goosebumps erupt all over my arms as my body shivers.

Shifting the car into gear, I back out of the driveway and head to my new home.

I really hope that the vibes I’m getting from Calvin are wrong. There’s no way I want my mother hurt by him.

I instantly fall in love with Roxy’s house the moment I pull into the driveway.

She takes me on a tour, showing me every corner of her cozy little abode, each nook and cranny warming my nerves, which tells me I made the right choice.

It’s quaint and warm, and feels like home.

Though I’m not sure if it’s the house itself, or my new step-sister, but I try not to think about such things.

Whatever the case, it’s better than being in that house with Calvin and Harry.

Roxy leads us into the eat-in kitchen first—it's got that retro charm, a little table tucked by the window, and the kind of mismatched mugs that make a place feel lived in. She’s beaming from head to toe as I look around, taking it all in.

From there, she guides me into the hallway, pointing out the bathroom. It's small, but still bigger than what I had at home. The walls are a soft mint green with white towels neatly folded on the rack. The sink is one of those pedestal kinds, giving the room a sense of elegance.

Then comes the live-stream room. It surprises me, but delights me at the same time.

Curtains hang from the ceiling to change the backdrop, and in one corner, a polished dance pole gleams under soft lighting.

There’s also a bed, full of throw pillows with a table sitting at the end.

Ring lights are placed strategically in the room, ensuring the best lighting.

“You can use it anytime,” she says casually, “so you don’t always have to drive to the warehouse.”

The thought of less time spent driving is amazing.

“Can I use it tonight?” I ask, already knowing that I’m going to get the answer I’m hoping for.

“Absolutely.” She nods without hesitation, a smile beaming at me full of joy and I swear I can see desire. Is that really something you can see?

She continues the tour, showing me the linen closet in the hallway, then her bedroom—a true reflection of her personality with splashes of color, texture, and a laid-back elegance. The ensuite bathroom is unexpectedly massive. I can’t help but gape at it in awe.

“You can use my bathroom too if you like,” she offers. “The hallway one’s fine, but I know I like having space to move around and get ready in.”

“I’m sure it’ll be fine,” I reply, though my throat feels dry from how much she’s offering me without a second thought. Is this what it’s really like to have a roommate? Or is it more because of this insane pull I feel towards her, and dare I think, that she feels towards me?

Finally, she opens one last door. “This is your room,” Roxy says, pausing for a moment as she steps to the side. “It’s not much yet, but that’s just because it’s empty.”

I move up to the door, taking my first look inside. It’s perfect. Simple, just like me. So unlike what I imagine my room at Mom’s house would be like.

“I love it,” I tell her, eyes already scanning the walls, imagining art, lights, a soft rug, a reading nook. Visions of how I want to make this space truly mine.

The doorbell rings, breaking the trance I’m in.

“That’s the pizza!” she announces excitedly, clapping her hands together, and disappears down the hallway.

I linger in my room a little longer, a smile tugging at the corner of my lips. It feels right. Like the start of something good.

I follow the smell of melted cheese and sauce to the kitchen. Roxy’s already setting the table with paper plates and two sodas from the pantry.

“Sorry, these’ll be warm,” she says as she steps back over to the counter, “but I’m going to get us some ice out of the freezer.” She sets two glasses on the counter, fills them with ice, then pours the sodas. The soft fizzing sound fills the room, and I move over to the table.

Pulling out the chair, I sit down and open the boxes, the delicious aroma hitting me right in the face.

“There’s one more thing I need to give you.” She places the drink in front of me, then right beside it she places a shiny set of gold keys. “There’s one for the front and back door and the shed out back.”

“Thank you,” slips quietly from my lips. Tears well in my eyes at how sweet and sincere she’s been, even though I’ve pretty much ghosted her since we did our photo shoot.

“You’re welcome,” she replies kindly. “Now, let’s eat. Then we’ll bring your boxes in and watch a movie until the movers get here.”

I nod, already feeling full—but not from the food.

It’s the comfort. The welcome. The fresh start I’m making here with Roxy.

The independence I’m ushering into my life.

Somewhere in my brain, I think I should call Ezra, but when Roxy glances at me with a wink, I decide not to.

I don’t think he’ll answer, anyway. I guess the ball’s in his court now.