Page 15 of Chasing My Bliss (Behind The Lens #6)

Felicity

F uck, I’m going to be sick. Today is the day. My nerves are on overload, and just the thought of eating has me dry heaving.

The closer I get to the door of the room I’ve secured for the evening, the tighter the knot in my stomach grows. I don’t know if Roxy’s there yet, and I’m not sure if I want her to be or not.

The hallway is quiet. Too quiet. The walls feel like they’re closing in, and the silence only amplifies the anxiety crawling up my spine. The soft scuff of my shoes against the tile, my breathing shallow and uneven, doing nothing to calm me.

I stop just short of the door.

The only barrier between me and what's inside. It’s just a plain rectangle of wood and metal, but it feels like it holds so much more. My palm hovers near the handle. I can already feel the chill of it radiating toward me, almost as if it knows I’m hesitating.

The air is warm but stale, heavy with anticipation, or nerves—mine, maybe hers. Nah, who am I kidding? It’s solely mine. She isn’t nervous about anything. I shift my weight, heart skittering, a nervous flutter deep in my chest suddenly turning sharp.

I can still walk away , a small voice inside my head says, but my feet stay firmly planted.

My hand closes around the handle.

I pause.

One breath. Two breaths. Deep and even.

And then I turn it—slow, almost reverent. The latch clicks open like a secret spilling loose, and the door gives way beneath my push. I take my first step into the room. My head low, not wanting to see who or what awaits me.

“It’s going to be okay, Bliss,” is whispered into my ear.

Roxy.

“I know.” The words leave my mouth without any thought. Almost as if I believe what I’m saying wholeheartedly.

“Then why aren't you moving?” It’s then I realize I took the step inside the room, then froze.

“Well, I need both of you to move so I can finish setting up.” Chad’s deep voice booms from behind us, sending us both into a fit of laughter.

“Sorry, Bossman.” Roxy’s joyful voice rings out as she takes me by the shoulder and urges me forward into the room. “Thought you’d have us all ready to go by now.”

“Har har, Roxy. I would’ve if I didn’t have to wait for Carla to get home,” Chad announces as he carries some tripod looking things into the room.

“What happened to Jackie?”

“She has the flu. Which sucks because she was our sitter tomorrow night. I had this whole night planned with Nic and Carla. Now it’s all gone to shit because our backup sitter is out of town.

” I can tell he’s pissed, which I hope doesn’t carry over into our shoot.

My nerves alone are enough to make it an awkward situation.

Not only because of Roxy, but Chad is taking the pictures.

He’s never seen me like this and I’ll have to look him in the eyes after we’re done.

“I’m sorry.”

A smile suddenly appears on his face as he places the tripods on the bed and begins to set them up.

“Hey, are you free tomorrow night?”

“Yes. Why?” I raise my head in confusion. Out of the corner of my eye, I catch Roxy looking at me, confused, as the conversation is happening right in front of her.

“Could you watch the kids? They know you. And Carla trusts you with them since you’ve watched them before.” He clasps his hands together and lifts them to his chin, flashing me puppy dog eyes. “Pllleeeaaasssee!” He draws out.

“Yeah, I’d love to. Are you wanting me to watch them at your place or mine?” I ask, not sure how long this date is supposed to be.

“You pick. Whichever is easier for you, since you’re literally saving my ass.”

“I don’t care.” At home, at least I could work on some packing, which I’ve done none of since Mom’s been gone. I already know she’s going to give me an earful when she gets home and realizes.

“Alright.” He pauses for a minute. “It’ll be easy to drop them off to you on our way out.

We should be done and ready to pick them up around midnight.

Is that okay?” Midnight. Late. The thought of having to wake them up from sleeping in the middle of the night doesn’t sit well with me.

I almost offer to watch them at their place, but then driving home that late to an empty house isn’t appealing either.

“Why don’t you just bring a change of clothes and their jammies and let them stay the night? Make a real date out of it.”

His eyes go wide. “Seriously?”

“Yeah.” The air is knocked out of me when he wraps me up in a hug.

“Thank you,” he tells me again when he pulls away.

“Okay people, now that the kids are taken care of, can we get to work? We have orgasm magic to make!” Roxy calls out to us loudly. She’s smiling at me and the calm I just had talking with Chad is replaced once again with full-blown panic.

Chad shakes his head at her. “Go ahead and get ready and I’ll finish setting up. Then, when we’re done with the photo shoot, I’ll go ahead and turn on the video cameras. When you’re done, just turn them off and shoot me a message. I’ll go through all the angles and make a killer video for you.”

I can’t speak, instead I give him this fucking awkward as hell thumbs up. God, I’m a dork.

“Perfect.” Roxy turns her attention to me. “I thought we’d start with some lingerie shots and kissing, then we can move to some toys and nudity. Sound good?”

Another question. Fuck, why can’t they let me just stand here like a deer caught in headlights?

“Bliss? Earth to Bliss. Do you hear me?” I don’t know when she moved, but she’s standing right in front of me now, her hands cupping my face as she looks right into my eyes.

“It’s going to be okay. Just like every other time we’ve been together, it’s just you and me.

I know you know Chad outside of here, but just pretend like he’s not there. Keep your eyes on me.”

“Okay,” I gasp, taking a deep breath to calm myself.

“Good. Now I have lingerie for the shoot and the video. And before you say anything, I know we could use the same ones, but I’m an extra bitch.” She lets go of my face, taking my hand in hers and leads me across the room.

I can’t help but let out a belly wrenching laugh when she shows me the outfit for the photo shoot.

“Seriously?” The question blurts from my mouth.

“One hundred percent.” She hands out the tiny, and I mean tiny , Catholic school girl skirt to me along with the white see- through lace bra and white thigh-high stockings. I do a double take before she hands me the matching see-through lace thong. Which is also crotchless. Perfect.

“And what are you wearing?” She holds up a matching set to what she gave me, except instead of white lace, hers is red.

“We’re twins. You’re the virginal one and I’m the fucking slutty one.

Just like in real life.” She laughs and takes hold of the hem of her shirt, pulling it over her head.

It’s as if she doesn’t even care that Chad’s in the room.

In a way, she shouldn’t. It’s not like he’s not going to see us naked and up close and personal.

I take a deep breath and suck it up. The only way to get through this is to just do it. The quicker we get it done, the sooner it’s over with it.

I quickly change, pushing to the back of mind that Chad is right here in the room with us. Why did I ever agree to this?

“You look hot as hell, Bliss. Maybe you should be in red.” Roxy gives me an appraising look before stepping over to Chad. “So, how do you want us to set up for the first shot? Or do you just want us to play it by ear and do what feels right?”

“Let’s go by ear. It’ll make it look more natural,” he tells her as he fiddles with his camera.

I can’t help but be astonished at how he’s not giving the blonde bombshell beside him a second look.

But then I remember who he's married to. Carla and Nic are both stunning and even the times I’ve seen them all together, they only seem to have eyes for each other. It's as if no one else exists to them.

That’s the love I want one day. Just like theirs.

I feel like I have it with Ezra. But this calendar could change how he feels about me. It’s one thing talking about it, but seeing it is a whole different story.

“Okay ladies, let's get this show on the road. Your month is July, and your holiday is National Orgasm Day. Is that right, Fel…sorry, Bliss?” Chad catches himself before saying my real name. I love that he’s keeping this professional using my cam name for the company.

“Yeah, that’s it. Who would’ve known my birthday would also be a national holiday.” My statement makes everyone laugh and I can’t help but join in.

“That’s my girl. The world knew she deserved to be celebrated in the best way with a big ‘O’.” Roxy steps up behind me, her hands sliding around the bare flesh on my waist as she nibbles on my ear.

It happens so quickly, and I don't even know he's done it until a click, click sounds in the room. “That was a perfect shot. Sweet, simple, yet appealing to the masses.”

“Next time warn me.” I lean back into Roxy, taking the comfort she’s giving me.

“As long as you promise me that they’ll all be as natural as this picture is.”

Promise. I’m not sure I can do that. Not when my nerves decide to take hold of me.

“She will,” Roxy answers for me.

“Okay, ladies,” Chad says gently, as he moves to the foot of the bed.

“Let’s have the two of you on the bed, nice and close to each other.

I want both of you to angle your bodies slightly inward toward each other.

Roxy, place your hand just at Bliss’s waist…

yes, perfect. Now lean in like you’re about to whisper something to her. ”

My fingers search for Roxy’s, finding them on the comforter right at my side. We interlock our pinkies just as Roxy leans into me. “You always smell like cherries,” she murmurs, brushing her nose against my cheek.

I can’t help but chuckle, loving that she notices something so insignificant. She tilts her face just slightly to meet my lips in a gentle kiss. One that’s unhurried and tender. Her free hand slips through my loose locks, cradling my head.

Click. Click-click.

“Beautiful,” Chad says. “Now, Bliss, tilt your head a little more. Let your hand rest on her collarbone…” We do just as Chad tells us, “there. Like you’re anchoring yourself to her. Perfect. Now hold it.”

My fingertips brush the edge of Roxy’s neck, tracing lightly over her skin. The chemistry between us buzzing like electricity in the stillness.

“Hold that… don’t rush it,” Chad whispers, "you want us to feel just what you are. Nice and slow. Yes. That’s the shot.”

Click. Click-click.

I pull back slightly, my eyes flickering between her eyes and lips. “You’re really good at pretending,” I whisper.

Roxy smiles, brushing a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “Who said I’m pretending?”

I gulp. Not sure what to say. Am I reading too much into her words?

Chad clears his throat and our eyes move over to him. He lowers his camera, grinning. “You two are magic. Let’s keep going—but this time I want you laying down on the bed. Roxy, you work your magic on her. I want to get some candid pictures while you two are performing.”

We move into our new positions almost without a word—all except for Roxy having me sit up to remove not only my bra, but then hers as well. I lay back, resting my head on the pillow, breathing in deeply. I’m fucking half naked in front of Chad, with Roxy’s body pressed up against mine.

Roxy’s propped up on one arm, while she rests the other just above my hip. Her eyes locked on mine. “It’s just you and me. Remember that. Just like when we’ve been getting to know each other.”

“Perfect,” Chad murmurs through the viewfinder. “Roxy, slide your hand from Bliss’s waist up along her ribcage—slowly, so we can feel the anticipation.”

Roxy’s fingertips trace lazily along my skin. I inhale sharply, tilting my head back exposing my neck to the camera. Roxy leans in, lips brushing along my breast and pebbled nipples in a series of feather-light kisses.

Roxy’s hand drifts to my leg, taking hold of my thigh and lifting it up and over her legs, putting my center on display.

With the crotchless panties on, she’s now bearing my pussy for the camera to see.

Her fingertips press into my clit, rubbing tiny circles.

.. “You taste like cherry too,” she whispers.

Click. Click-click.

Her mouth latches onto my nipple as she swirls her tongue around the hard mound. Her fingers move quickly around my clit before slipping through my wet folds to my opening.

One finger.

In and out, she moves it. A steady pace, curling the tip of her finger as she pulls outward.

Then two.

I can feel the pressure building. My chest arches up, pushing my tit deeper into her face as she continues to finger fuck me.

“Oh fuck,” I whimper. “It feels so good. I’m so close.”

Her mouth pops off my tit, and she blows warm air across the already sensitive bud.

“I want you to come for me, Bliss. Show me how much you like this. How much it turns you on having my fingers deep inside of you. My mouth on these gorgeous tits of yours.”

“I love it,” I gasp. Her words are only pushing me closer to the edge. My hips begin to move in sync with her fingers. She presses the heel of her palm down on my clit and that's all it takes to send me careening over the edge.

My thighs slam together, holding her hand captive as my orgasm takes over. It’s earth shattering as my mouth falls open and my eyes close. I’ve never had an orgasm so intense before. The pleasure rips through me, but guilt lingers in its wake.

Not for the camera.

Not for Chad.

For Ezra. For acting like this changed nothing.

Click. Click-click.

“That was amazing, ladies. Just a little bit more, and I’ll say we're done here. I need the two of you to completely undress and give me some scenes like that. You don’t necessarily have to come again. Just give me some good facials.”

Oh, fuck me. I was so caught up I completely forgot Chad was here.

I just pray that what they can see of my orgasm face doesn’t look like I’m constipated or some shit.