Page 34

CHAPTER 34

brEAKUPS AND SETUPS

BELLA

November

“Why is your cousin here?” Jake pulls into his driveway and comes to an abrupt stop.

I bite my bottom lip to hide my growing smile. With Ben by my side, everything will be fine. “I asked him to come,” I say, making eye contact.

He scowls. “Why? We’re leaving for dinner in two hours. You won’t have time?—”

“I’m not going to dinner.” I throw open the door and climb out of Jake’s SUV.

“Hey.” I wave at my cousin, focusing solely on him.

Ben uncrosses his legs and straightens from where he’s been leaning against his car. As he heads my way, hands hidden in his pockets, his calm demeanor transfers to me, helping me gather the courage to stand up for myself.

When a car door slams shut behind my back, though, an intense shiver runs down my spine, making it hard to hold on to that resolve. I don’t need to look at Jake to know he’s pissed.

He stomps after me and grips the nape of my neck, making me stagger back.

“What’s gotten into you?” he hisses in my ear.

My back collides with his chest, and a gust of air escapes my lips.

Ben darts forward, his face murderous. “Miller, let her go.”

Jake only squeezes harder, his breathing going ragged. I wince, certain he’ll leave a bruise.

“You’re hurting her.”

Before Ben can physically intervene, Jake lets go of me and steps back.

I release a shaky breath as relief slowly swims through my veins, letting my body relax. Everything is fine.

I turn around and am immediately caught in his glare. Anger shimmers behind his irises, far too familiar to mean anything good.

“What’s going on?” He tightens his hands into fists at his sides.

I look at him, mustering the courage to say the things I need to say. With a deep breath, I take off the ring he gave me and hold it out to him. “This ring…isn’t for me.”

His eyes go wide, then narrow to slits. “What the fuck are you talking about?”

“We’re done. We aren’t right for each other, and we never were. Getting back together was a mistake?—”

“Since fucking when?” he barks. “You’re the only girl in the world who would dump someone like me. Twice!”

“You’ll find someone better than me, someone who shares your interests, who wants to go out at night, who will be happy with your expensive gifts. You don’t need me.”

“I don’t need you? What the fuck?” He lunges forward, but Ben steps in front of me.

I fist the ring, its diamond digging into my skin. It’s painful, but at least it helps me stay focused.

“Fuck off, Ben. Let me talk to her.”

“No.”

“Who do you think you are?” He puffs up and gets in Ben’s face, trying to intimidate him. Jake is undoubtedly bigger and taller, but Ben stands his ground, squaring his shoulders and lifting his chin. “ Step back .”

“ You step back, and calm the fuck down.”

Jake snorts. “Are you for real?”

“She’s my family, Miller. I won’t let you hurt her.”

“I don’t want to hurt her!” Jake rakes his fingers through his hair, the vein in his neck pulsing. “I want to talk.”

“Then act like it,” Ben grinds out.

A heavy silence settles among us. Every muscle in my body is tense. His reaction is worse than I thought it would be. He’s barely controlling himself, his knuckles turning white as he pulls on his hair. If not for Ben…I don’t even want to think about it.

Slowly, Jake lowers his arms, breathing heavily. The feverish glint in his gaze makes my skin crawl. It’s like a fixation, and I’m the center of his attention. Nothing else exists for him in this moment.

“Isabella, can we talk?” he asks in a strained voice. “Please?”

I watch him intently, then nod. “Yes, but let me get my things first.”

His eyes flash with anger, but the expression is gone as quickly as it came. Then he slips on one of his many masks, this one full of sorrow. “Okay.”

When Jake steps aside, Ben shifts, still shielding me. He doesn’t trust him, and I don’t blame him.

His shoulders are hunched as he stomps to the front door. After he disappears inside, Ben gives me a small, reassuring smile and guides me into the house.

Physically, the place hasn’t changed. All the pieces I picked are in place, but all the happiness and excitement have disappeared. It feels shallow and unwelcome inside. Was it always like this? Could I have been delusional enough to not notice?

“Where’s your stuff?” Ben asks.

Jake replies before I can. “Upstairs.” He keeps his focus on me. “I didn’t touch anything.”

“Thanks,” I say, heading toward the stairs. “We’ll get all my stuff, and then we can talk.”

“I’ll wait for you in the living room.”

* * *

Twenty minutes later, my meager possessions are boxed up and loaded into Ben’s car.

Ben stands in the front yard with his phone to his ear, and I stand a few feet away, staring at Jake’s house. The sky is already deep blue, the last remnants of daylight peeking through wisps of clouds. An oak tree from his neighbors’ lawn looms over the house, casting long shadows. Inside, the lights are off, which means he’s sitting in the dark. That doesn’t bode well. I have no idea what’s on his mind, but I know what’s on mine.

I need to be out of his life as soon as possible, or he will ruin me completely. I can heal from what’s happened, but I’m afraid if I drag this out any longer, there won’t be anything left to recover.

Running my hands over the skirt of my dress, I straighten and stride toward the house.

“Bella…” Ben says behind me.

Over my shoulder, I respond, “Wait for me in the car.”

“No way. If I wasn’t here, he would have hurt you already. I’m not leaving you alone with him.”

I pause. “Maybe you can wait for me in the hallway? Just in case.”

Lips pressed together, he searches my face, then nods. “Okay.”

With a deep breath, I step inside. From the sounds coming from the living room, it’s obvious Jake’s watching game footage on his phone. At least that’s normal.

“Mind if I turn on the lights?” I ask.

“Sure.” He shrugs and tosses his phone onto the cushion beside him.

I turn on the lights, sit on the opposite end of the couch, and set the ring on the table.

Jake swallows loudly, his fists tightening again. “Why?”

Nerves skitter down my back, but I work to keep my voice even. “We aren’t right for each other.”

“No, Isabella. I’ve heard that one before, and it’s fucking bullshit. You just told me you’d marry me, and now you’re breaking up with me? You gotta give me a better reason than that.”

“You’ve been cheating on me,” I say simply. The words don’t affect me in the slightest. It’s just a fact, and it doesn’t matter what he might say. I know I’m right.

His eyes go wide. “What?”

“I said you’ve been cheating on me.”

Breath ragged, he drops to his knees in front of me. “Baby, please, don’t do this to me. I’m far from perfect, but I love you. I’ve always loved you, and I’ll go crazy if you aren’t with me. It happened to me once, and fuck —I can’t go back to that. I need you, only you.”

Tears stream down his face, but all I feel is indifference.

“I can’t be with you. I can’t stay with you without breaking myself. I revert to the old Isabella when I’m with you, the one who kept quiet so she didn’t cause any trouble, the girl my mother loathed and treated like shit. That version of me needs to stay in the past.”

“You should’ve told me how you felt. I would’ve…” He trails off.

I have to bite back a laugh. It’s textbook victim blaming—I wouldn’t expect anything less from him. “You would’ve what? Treated me differently?” I smirk, avoiding his eyes. “Since the moment we reconnected, you’ve been manipulating me. Gaslighting me. Cheating on me. Do you think anything I could say would’ve changed that?”

He hangs his head. “I’m sorry. You’re right. I-I cheated on you a few times. I always justified it because it wasn’t sex—just a blow job, just a kiss. But you didn’t deserve that. I’m sorry.”

His admission does nothing to me. Little by little, he has killed all the affection I had for him. There’s nothing left.

“Baby, what am I going to do without you? No matter what you think, I love you.” He takes my hand in his, holding it between his palms.

“You’ll be fine. It’ll be lonely, and you’ll hurt for a bit, but…you’ll be fine. You’re Jake Miller!” I say, probably sounding like a robot. “You always get what you want.”

“But not you.”

“Not me. We aren’t right for each other. It’s for the best.” I nod at the ring on the table. “You can probably still return it.”

He zeroes in on it, lips pursed, then picks it up and holds it between us. “It’s my gift to you. Take it.”

“No. It’s too expensive.” I try to stand, but he grasps my wrists, holding me in place.

He turns my palm up and puts the ring in it, then closes my fingers over it. “Take it. Do whatever you want with it—sell it, give it to someone else. Hell, throw it away. Whatever. It’s yours.”

Hands in my lap, I study him for a moment. He does look miserable and apologetic, but after everything I’ve been through—with my mom, with Kevin, with him—it’s hard to accept. His apology has come too late.

Still, I nod.

With a groan, he stands, pulling me up with him. With his hand on my nape, he angles my face up until our mouths are only inches apart.

I press my open palms to his chest and push. “Let me go.”

His fingers skim over my neck as he holds my gaze, his dilated pupils making his blue-gray eyes almost black. “Let me kiss you.”

“No.”

“Let me kiss you, Isabella. Please.” He angles closer and inhales; an eerie smile blooms on his face. “You’re making me crazy… Let me kiss you one last time.”

“Jake.” With more force this time, I push at his chest.

He only squeezes harder.

“Miller.” Ben’s voice rings in the air. “Let her go.”

With a glare at my cousin, Jake finally takes a step back and slips his hands into his pockets. “I got carried away.” The way his lip curls up sends a wave of unease through me. This is all a game to him. “It won’t happen again.”

“I hope so.” I take a step back, then another before I turn and walk away.

“Isabella?”

My heart pinches, but I stop. “Yeah?”

“I have no right to ask this, but…can we please not make our breakup public yet? I’ll look like a fucking loser if it gets out that you dumped me right after I proposed.”

More than anything, I want to say no. He deserves whatever he gets. But if it means he won’t bother me anymore? I’m willing to take that risk.

“Okay. You have one month.” I turn on my heel and head out of the living room.

* * *

For two days, I hide out at my aunt’s house, thankful for her and Ben and Tom and all the ways they’ve worked to distract me from my thoughts.

It’s incredible, this true freedom from Jake. But without Xander in my life, there’s an ache in my chest that won’t go away.

Audrey texts a couple of times, reminding me about her party and sending me the address. I consider bailing, pretending I’m sick. But I want to see him, and this is the best way to make that happen.

* * *

Nerves rush through me as I knock on the front door. I can’t imagine I’ll know anyone here but Xander and his sister, and honestly, I don’t even really know Audrey—and from what I do know, she’s not all that fond of me.

With any luck, Xander will keep me company, but what if he doesn’t want to speak with me? With zero communication between us since Sunday, it’s a possibility I can’t ignore. And what if he brought a date?

“Isabella!” Audrey opens the door and looks me up and down. “I’m glad you decided to come.”

“Happy birthday,” I say, my muscles tensing.

“Thank you.” She steps back to let me in. “Is that for me?” She tips her head toward the bouquet in my hand.

“Yes.” I give her the flowers, and she instantly buries her nose in them. “Peonies are my favorite. Hope you like them too.”

“I love them.” She smiles, though I can’t help but remain on edge in her presence. After Sunday, I can’t trust that she’s being genuine. “Come on, I’ll introduce you to everyone.”

On the terrace, we make our rounds. I meet close to a dozen people. Her parents aren’t here due to an unexpected trip to Washington, but at least her husband flew in.

“Bella?”

I look over my shoulder and lock eyes with Xander. He’s standing in the doorway, gaping at me in surprise.

My heart sinks.

He didn’t know I’d be here, did he? Audrey set me up.