Page 34

33

Summer

M y heart is still slamming in my chest, remnants of fear still surging through me when I slide into my bedroom. Connor is still passed out in my bed, and while that brings about another wave of anxiety, it’s nothing compared to the spikes of adrenaline piercing me. I press my back to the door, squeezing my eyes closed as I grapple for control. In the quiet, Connor’s easy breaths become a guide, leading me into calmness. I inhale for five and exhale for ten, syncing my breathing with Connor’s.

The sweat on my skin lingers like slime, the essence of that predatory gaze still on me. I push away from the door and nearly run to the bathroom, shoving at my clothes, needing them off, needing to be under the water. I turn the shower on, adjusting it until steam billows around me. The scalding water pours over me, and I welcome the burn. I scrub at my skin until it’s pink and raw, but I can still feel it there, clinging like poison. The worst part is that it isn’t unfamiliar.

A hand glides along my lower back and wraps around my waist. My body goes rigid, but the scream lodges in my throat when the scent of clouds fills the shower. I relax a little and lean back into Connor.

“Holy shit, babe. It’s hot!” He reaches out and turns the temperature to a much less punishing one. He bends his head and kisses my shoulder, his voice still slightly hazed with sleep. “Morning.”

“Morning, big guy,” I reply, my voice shaking slightly.

“Did I scare you?”

I turn in his arms slowly, my confident mask fully in place again. “Did you enjoy your first and only sleepover?”

“I loved spending time with my very affectionate pre-girlfriend most of all.” He cups my cheek, his eyes shining brightly with sincerity. “I didn’t mean to stay.”

I roll my eyes, trying to push some distance into the moment between us. “I woke up on top of you. It’s not like you had a whole lot of choice.”

He nuzzles my nose, and the distance I’d managed to put between us disappears. The icy walls I’ve put so much effort into melt in the presence of his warmth. He is able to do what the scalding water couldn’t manage.

“Just making sure. My pre-girlfriend’s boundaries are important to me.”

I reach up, twining my fingers into the golden hair at his neck. “I don’t remember agreeing to that label.”

“Soon, you’ll be begging to be my girlfriend. I’m just so damn charming,” Connor continues as if I hadn’t spoken.

I laugh and pull back. “Fine. Pre-girlfriend.”

I’m not sure why I agreed to it, but I realize I don’t want to deny his claim.

When Connor and I finally leave the shower, we dry off and go back into the bedroom. Connor collapses on the bed, leaning against the headboard to watch me dress. He’s always watching me. Sap.

“Do you want me to go home?” he asks, tucking a pillow behind his back, his abs rippling with the movement. “Am I smothering you?”

That’s another thing Connor does. He is constantly checking on where I am emotionally with him. I tilt my head and watch him, trying to process my emotions to answer him truthfully. Am I overwhelmed? Maybe. Am I uneasy that we actually slept in the same bed? Perhaps. I shake my head. “I’m not ready for regular sleepovers, but I don’t want you to go.”

Happiness radiates from him, his smile nearly blinding. Unable to resist the pull of his desire just to be with me, I walk to the bed and straddle him, kissing him deeply.

He grips my hips lightly and gently breaks the kiss. “Are you sure?”

I quirk a brow. “Unless you want to leave?”

He pulls me close, kissing up my neck and along my jaw. Connor’s phone rings and he sighs against my throat. He reaches out, blindly grabbing for his phone off the bedside table as he continues kissing over my cheek.

“Hello?” His voice is low, his desire clear.

“Hi, baby boy!” A bright, kind voice comes through the phone. Connor’s eyes go wide, and he bolts upright, sending me flying back onto the bed.

“Hi, Mom!” His cheeks flush brighter than I’ve ever seen.

I bite my lip to keep from laughing. I grab the shirt he wore last night from the end of the bed and pull it on, but keep some distance between us. There is something oddly indecent about being nearly naked in bed with him while he is on the phone with his mom.

“How’s one of my six favorite boys in the whole world?” Her voice is muffled, but thanks to my fae hearing, the phone may as well be pressed to my ear instead of his.

“I’m great, Mom. It’s weird you call Dad a boy, though.” Connor laughs. Any trace of embarrassment has vanished from his face.

“He’s my first boy! You know he’s a big kid, especially when it comes to roughhousing with our babies!”

There’s something so endearing about hearing this conversation between them. It is so filled with familial love that I can’t help but be drawn in, and I shift closer to him. Connor wraps his arm around me and pulls me closer.

“So, uh… speaking of roughhousing.” Connor pauses, and I feel tension fill his body. “I need to tell you something.”

“Rafe’s missing,”

Connor’s mom says, and a pang of guilt spears through me. I should tell him I’ve seen Rafe and that he’s fine, but I can’t. I need to keep the agreement Rafe and I made this morning.

“Luke called me this morning,” his mom continues. “Do you need us to come to Avalon?”

“No, I can handle it.” Connor tightens his arm around me as if absorbing strength from me. “He’s fighting again.”

“I figured.” She sighs, and I can hear the burden entwined with the concern in her voice. “That sweet, perfect boy.” My brows draw at that. How can she think of him like that, knowing what he’s doing? He’s inflicting pain not only on those he fights but his family, as well. Is that what a mother’s love is supposed to be?

“Your father and I are planning a visit soon anyway since none of my perfect boys have visited us in weeks!” Again, I hear nothing but love in her voice, no lingering disappointment or hurt, only the desire to see them.

I wave, pulling Connor’s attention and mouth to him, “Do you want me to go?”

He shakes his head and pulls me closer. “Not too soon, Mom. I have to be official with Summer first.”

His mom squeals. “How are you both? You promised me a photograph of her for the binder! Is she beautiful? I bet she is absolutely stunning. And so kind. Just perfection. The best for my Conbear.”

My lips twitch at the adorable pet name, but discomfort squirms in my stomach at the rest of her words. How could I ever live up to such steep expectations? I am nothing more than an outsider, an interloper.

Connor looks at me, his blue eyes searching mine. “She’s gorgeous. But you don’t get a photo until she is officially my girlfriend.”

“Is she not wanting to be exclusive with you? I could talk to her! A lot of girls are just traumatized by men, Con.”

You have no idea, Mrs. Morningstar…

Connor laughs. “No, Mom, we are exclusive. She’s just a little shy.”

“She’s shy? How unexpected!”

Connor kisses my temple. “Not shy in that way, Mom. She’s just shy about committing. You know I’m a patient guy.”

“You are. My perfect, Connor. Fine. Your father and I will stop pushing about visiting, but remember, parent’s weekend is coming up! Please send me a photo. I want to know who my baby boy is so besotted with!”

“Farrah, my love, he will send it when they are ready,” a male voice gently interrupts. The affection and love in his voice make my heart ache.

“All right. But you’ll keep updating me on your brothers’ romantic escapades?”

Connor shifts and lays down, pulling me with him. “Well, Zach is definitely dating someone, and he thinks no one knows, but he’s so embarrassingly obvious about it.”

I can hear his mom shifting, probably settling in to listen. “Tell me everything.”

Connor runs his fingers through my hair. “Well, the last couple of days, he’s been coming home in the morning wearing the same shirt as the night before. He’s also been sneaking out of the house but in the loudest way possible.”

“Uriel!” his mom exclaims. “Zach is dating! We need another binder!”

His dad’s laugh is so similar to Connor’s that I can’t help but smile. “Is it serious? I told you we only make them for serious relationships now.”

“He’s not telling people about her, Uriel! Of course, it’s serious.”

“I’m the only one who’s in a serious relationship, Mom.”

I pull back, lifting an eyebrow at him.

“But we’re taking it slow, aren’t we, babe?” Connor continues.

“She’s there?! Uriel! She’s there!” Farrah is practically shouting in excitement.

“You’ll just scare her, Mom. She’s a little nervous about how perfect I am.”

I can’t stop the laugh that escapes, and his mom gasps at the sound.

“Oh! Such a pretty laugh! I wish I could put that in the binder. Uriel, can you believe Connor thinks we’ll scare her off?”

His dad chuckles. “Ridiculous. We’re so charming!”

Connor smiles contentedly and continues to stroke my hair. “For the rest of us, no one of interest is showing up.”

“Hmm,” Farrah hums softly. “Okay, go spend time with my future daughter-in-law. If you need help with Rafe, we’ll be there.”

“I can handle Rafe. Don’t worry, Mom.”

“I love you, my Con. I miss you terribly.”

Connor pauses for a second, his hand stilling in my hair. “Mom?”

“Yes, my darling?”

“One of my feathers… turned.”

“Already?” Her voice is a little more tentative now. “Uriel, did you hear that?”

“You’re so young,” Uriel says, sounding strained.

“This is… wonderful news!” his mom begins, and I glance up at Connor. His face is more serious than I’ve ever seen it. “It doesn’t change anything, Con. It just means that, well,” her voice breaks, “you’re so, so special. Even more incredible than we already thought!”

“Farrah.” Uriel says her name with such tenderness, and I realize I have heard the same in Connor’s voice when he says mine. “Connor, I’ll talk to Uncle Michael. Maybe the Almighty has spoken to him about this.”

“We love you, Connor.”

“Give our love to your brothers,” Uriel says, ending the call for Farrah.

I look up at Connor. “Your family is pretty close, huh?”

“We are.”

I smile and take his phone. Tapping on the camera app, I switch it to the front camera and hold it high, focusing it on our face. “Smile, big guy.”

Instead of smiling, Connor turns his head and presses a kiss to my temple. I smile up at the camera and snap the photo. I turn my head and kiss him, blindly taking another photo before pulling back and handing him his phone.

“Send the first one to your mom.”

His brows shoot up. “Babe, you need to understand. My mom is obsessed with?—”

I cover his mouth with my fingers. “Send it. It’ll make her happy. If we break up, she can burn it in anger.”

Connor nips at my fingertips. “We’re not breaking up.” He sends the first photo to his mom and sets the second as his wallpaper. Almost immediately, his phone pings with multiple messages. He glances at the screen, smiling at the messages from his mom. “And so it begins…”

“I’m glad she likes the photo, Conbear ,” I quip.

Connor gives me a look.

“Oh, don’t like that nickname?” I laugh and curl closer against his side.

“Only my mom calls me that.”

“You’re such a momma’s boy.”