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Summer

“ S ummer!” I look back when I hear Alice’s voice from behind me. She smiles and breaks into a bouncy jog to catch up with me.

I smile brightly at her. “Hi!”

Alice links her arm through mine. “I missed you last night, but I’m pretty sure I’m going to ace my final,” she says excitedly. This plant is a large part of her final grade, and I love how excited she is about botany.

I squeeze her arm. “That’s amazing, Al.” I look down at my hand, the ring concealed by my sleeve. “I have some news, too.”

“Oh?” Alice asks.

I push my sleeve back, showing her the ring glittering daintily on my finger. Alice stops and whirls on me, grabbing my hand.

“What is this? Are you… Did he?” She looks at me, her eyes wide, her mouth gaping.

I nod and smile brightly. The second my lips pull up, Alice takes that as confirmation that I’m happy, and she screams, jumping up and down.

I laugh and jump with her until she pulls me into a hug. “This is amazing! I’m so fucking happy for you, Sum.” I hug her back, smiling. It’s funny how telling my best friend made me feel light again. Alice’s pure happiness for me wipes away Max’s reaction. I push away thoughts of the uncomfortable conversation I have to have with Luke tomorrow and enjoy this moment of joy.

As we walk back to the dorm, we dive into wedding plans. I try to tell her I don’t think it’ll be for a while, but I get caught up in her excitement.

Connor grabs me the second I walk into the room, spinning me. “Hello, fiancée,” he says, kissing me sweetly.

I smile against his lips. “Well, hey there.”

“Oh, gods. You two are going to be even more unbearable now,” Alice grumbles, but when I glance at her, she’s smiling widely as she watches us. Connor doesn’t put me down, but he looks at Alice, his smile almost blinding. “Congrats, bird brain.”

“Thanks, Al. You okay with sharing your wife with me?”

Alice shrugs. “You’re just providing the penis. I know I’ll always be the favorite.”

I laugh and nuzzle into Connor’s cheek as they bicker. At that moment, it’s as if I can see a glimpse of my future, and I feel an overwhelming sense of awe that it’ll include these two wonderful people.

Connor and I lay in bed. He’s sound asleep, and I am yearning to check my phone. Connor made the engagement post today. I wanted to wait to tell the stranger, but it didn’t seem fair to prolong something that Connor was so excited about for the benefit of… someone else.

My phone pings, and my heart sinks. I already know who it is, and I can feel the looming fight between us, but if I want to keep him in my life, I need to face it.

I climb out of bed, the pattern of my nights getting so scarily familiar that I move on muscle memory. I unlock my phone, and the post flashes up. It’s a basic engagement photo. My hand is in Connor’s and the ring is displayed in that I’m newly engaged and insufferable kind of way. I can see the notification in the top corner, and I sit on the couch before opening it.

Why is my heart beating so fast?

Why am I trying to justify this? I agreed to marry the man that I love.

There’s a pause before he replies, and I can see him typing and then not, then typing again.

I exhale. I expected hostility, but his questions are a little too probing.

He starts typing and stops again. I wait for a whole minute before I message him again.

I can feel his sadness, and I’m a little disarmed by the fact he’s not yelling at me. So, I decide the best course of action is to change the subject to something that might cheer him up.

I glance at the closed bedroom door before calling the stranger.

“Little fae,” he says, his unglamoured voice again sending a shiver down my spine.

“Stranger,” I say, shifting against the couch.

“You must be ecstatic,” he says, his tone sharp.

“What’s wrong?” I ask, but I immediately regret it. What a stupid question.

I hear him shift in his chair. It sounds like expensive leather. “Why do you ask that?”

“I can hear it in your voice.”

He sighs, releasing so much pent-up frustration that it sounds almost soothing. “Just a long day,” he says. Maybe he is okay with the engagement. Is it possible he’s over his little crush on me and wants to just be friends? The thought makes me bristle a little, but I push it away, focusing on him.

“Is it about that female you like?” Oh, gods. Why did I ask that? Why am I poking the bear?

“Little fae.” The tension crackles down the line between us. “I cannot talk about her without crossing boundaries, and we both know why that is.”

Did he just confirm that it is me? Fuck, I don’t know anymore. I sigh and pull my knees to my chest. “Tell me about it? Your day.”

“You want to hear about my long day?”

I exhale. This tension between us is unbearable, and I can feel every knot of it. “More than anything.”

I hear the clink of crystal and imagine a carafe filled with the most expensive scotch. He takes a drink before he begins. “It started fine, then turned into an absolute fucking wreck.” The way he growls a little on the curse word makes my fingers tighten on the phone. “I had several meetings. Everyone is just fucking incompetent.”

I lift my eyebrows, mentally filing that information away, and I decide to push my luck. “Meetings? What do you do?”

He tsks, but I hear a smile appear in his voice. “Nice try, little fae. You know I can’t tell you that.”

I huff. “Not even a clue? Must be a pretty shit job if you have meetings on a Saturday.”

“No clues. And yes, my job is twenty-four-seven, most weeks anyway.”

“Fine.” I pout, even though he can’t see me.

“Brat.” He laughs darkly, and my toes curl. Fuck. He needs to stop calling me that.

“I–I’m glad you’re not talking to me differently,” I whisper.

There is a long silence, and I can hear him take another sip of his drink. When he replies, his voice is tight again. “What do you mean?”

“Well, my trainer at the gym treated me differently when he noticed the engagement ring.”

“Differently how?” he asks.

I play with the ends of my hair. “He was just acting all serious with me. Wouldn’t verbally jab back at me the way he usually does.”

“You provoke him too? And here I thought I was special.” The smirk is back, but there is a dangerous edge to it.

I bristle. “I don’t provoke him. We spar. Today, he obviously wasn’t in the bantering mood.”

He takes a drink. “You sure it had to do with the ring?”

“Pretty sure. It was after he noticed it that he went weird.” I shake my head, “Anyway, it’s whatever. I saw the headmaster afterward.”

“Ah, about the page?”

“Yeah, he was pretty dismissive, but I can’t really blame him. I told him not to meet with Luke until I’ve spoken to him.”

“Dismissive?”

I shrug. “Honestly, he’s probably just sick of the sight of me. I don’t imagine he sees a student in their whole time here as much as he has me in less than a year.”

“Ah, but you’re not just any student, are you?”

I scoff. “No, I’m the student who’s getting stalked by a crazy serial killer.”

The stranger laughs, and my lips twitch. “Well, that’s one way to put it.”

“Not exactly his favorite student. When he sees me, it’s because someone has been brutally murdered or I have another scrap of evidence for him.”

“But you’re also insatiable for knowledge. I’m sure that is not the case with most of his students.”

I groan. “I just fucking love learning.”

It’s true. I always have. Not only are innocent people being killed, and I’m being toyed with by some crazy fucker, but I’ve also not been able to sink properly into my studies. I know it is the least of my worries, but I miss it so much. Don’t get me wrong, I still love the classes and I’m still performing well, but I miss having endless hours to spend with my nose in a textbook or fucking about with rune creations. Though, even if a murderer wasn’t stalking me, my life is infinitely different from what it used to be. Where I used to only have learning, that’s not the case anymore, and I’m not sure if I’m ready to admit how wildly my priorities are shifting.

When I accepted my place at Avalon, I decided I would spend the next four years here working hard and learning, and then I would end this thing with Torin one way or another. But in my first year, while I have learned a lot, I’ve also fallen into all these relationships.

“Is that right?” the stranger asks, pulling me from my thoughts.

“Yes. There’s something so fucking empowering about it.”

“Explain.”

I shift on the couch and lie down, lowering my voice slightly. “You know when you’re in a library and find a book with all this information you know little about? Doesn’t it just give you a… buzz? Or when you’re one-on-one with someone and they’re teaching you something new… so hot.” I stare at the ceiling. If anyone can relate to my crazy, it’s the male I’m currently talking to.

The stranger clears his throat. “So you’re attracted to intelligence?”

“Extremely. It… does something to me.”

“I have the same,” the stranger growls, “thirst.”

“You do?” I whisper, anticipating his answer, anticipating the thrill of finally being understood.

“I do. Knowledge has always been something I crave.” The way he says the word crave has my womb clenching.

“Teach me something,” I whisper, the sound barely audible, and my breaths shallow.

“Something?”

“Anything.”

“Hm.” Gods, how does even that sound hot? This is getting bad. “The Runic Network works by replicating mortal social media without interacting with it. You can see all the mortal posts, but they can’t see you. It took me almost a year to create. Most deemed it unnecessary, yet it has been integral to immortal advancement.”

I bite my lip, trying to hold back my moan.

The stranger clears his throat again. “Little fae? Are you all right?”

“Absolutely.” My voice sounds foreign, even to my own ears. I swallow. “We should talk about something else.” My core pulses once and my breath hitches.

“Little fae?”

I clear my throat. “You know, I actually need to go.”

“Oh?”

“I… Um… Yeah, I have to go. Got to keep within those boundaries and…” Stop fucking talking, Summer.

“Right. I’ll speak to you later, then.” The stranger saves me by interrupting me.

“Stranger?” I say, unsure.

“Hm?”

“Thank you for… still being you.”

I hear him shift again, and that smile is back in his voice. “Well, who else could I be with you?”

“Like I said, the ring is changing people. I’m glad it’s not changing you.”

“Goodnight, little fae.”

“Goodnight, my stranger.” I end the call and close my eyes, cursing the words, the questions, the feeling in my core. There is some other explanation for this. It’s probably due to my vulnerability and inability to let myself be happy. Am I self-sabotaging?

I take a breath, looking up at the ceiling, promising myself I will do better. One way or another, I will deserve Connor. I pray to the gods that I may be worthy and that I will settle into my peace.