Page 74 of Awakened Desires

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. Do you still want to do it?"

"Yes. I'm curious."

"That's as good a reason as any. Shall we?"

I take a breath and follow Stefan upstairs to Rory's room.

Rory's room is on the second floor. It's much bigger than the room I’m sleeping in and doesn’t have several racks of clothes. It's neat, except for the desk, which has pieces of wood and various tools all over it. He's put a white sheet over the bed, and three candles are standing on the bedside table. They're green, and my heart stutters as I realise they’re a similar shade to my eyes.

"I can drip wax over your arms," Rory says. “Or your hands and feet. You wouldn't need to take your shirt off."

I tug at the fabric. "What would you normally do?" I'm looking at Rory, but I realise I should be looking at Stefan, as Rory is new at this.

"Whatever my sub feels comfortable with," Stefan says. "But normally, at least shirt off. Sometimes they would be fully naked. Everyone is different. Everyone has different limits. Only you know yours, and you need to communicate them to us."

I run my teeth over my lip. "I think I'd be okay taking my top off." I can always change my mind if I feel too self-conscious.

"Whatever works for you," Rory says. "Lie on the bed when you're ready."

“On my back or my front?"

Rory glances at Stefan.

"Again, that's up to you," Stefan says. "The back is less sensitive than the stomach."

I take my top off. It helps that I'm deciding to do it. I put the shirt on the edge of the bed and then lie down on my stomach, with my arms by my sides and my face turned so my cheek rests against the mattress.

"Are you okay?" Rory asks.

I nod. I can do this. Rory is my friend.

"Close your eyes if it helps, or keep them open. Whatever feels more natural."

I keep my eyes open to see what Rory is doing. Stefan leans against the desk, arms folded, watching. Rory lights all three candles. The flames are low at first but soon become tall flickering columns.

"Would you normally do this in the dark?" I ask.

"Dim lighting," Stefan replies.

"Would you prefer it if I dim the lights?" Rory asks.

I gnaw my lower lip. I'm not sure I would. I think it would feel more intimate if the lights were dimmed. With them bright, it feels like I'm taking part in a lesson. This isn't much different to being a life drawing subject in an art class. Except they would be drawing on canvas rather than using wax to draw on my body. The mental image that conjures up makes me shiver.

"No."

"I need to wait for the wax to melt," Rory says.

I look to Stefan. "Would you normally do something with the sub while waiting?"

"Yes. I might give them a light massage, or I'd ask them to tell me about their day." He chuckles. "Sometimes being a Dom is almost like being a therapist. I help my subs to relax, to escape the stress of their lives, and part of that is letting them offload on me."

Rory doesn't move, so I don't think he will give me a massage or offer one. Logically, I should be happy about that. Beyond a hug, I haven't let another man touch me since I was fourteen. Even then, I didn't let him, but he did it anyway.

I watch the flames as the tops of the candles become liquid. Wax starts to drip down the pillars, drying and becoming hard almost instantly.

"Are you ready?" Rory asks.