Page 39 of As a Last Resort
We got most of them transferred until there was one left, and she turned to me with it cradled in her hands.
“He’s not moving.” There were tiny water wells growing in her eyes, but I couldn’t tell if she was serious or if her eyes were filled from laughing. “Should we give him a proper burial?”
I hesitated. “I’m not sure what that looks like.”
“Aren’t you supposed to kiss a fish before you throw them back?”
“I don’t think that applies to dead fish.”
“Are you sure? I feel like that would be the appropriate thing to do.”
“You want me to kiss a dead fish?”
“I mean, this was your idea.” She shrugged apologetically.
I leaned forward cringing as a smirk appeared on her lips.
“You’re serious about this?” I was about to kiss a dead fish for this woman.
“It’s the right thing to do.” She pulled her lips into a fine line, laughter about to break through.
I leaned down and just as I puckered my lips, the fish bucked out of her hands and smacked me straight across the nose before flinging itself over the side back into the ocean.
“He’s a fugitive!” She completely doubled over in laughter, holding on to her stomach with both arms. She couldn’t catch her breath as I stood there, stunned, backhanded by a fish’s tail. Tears were streaming down her face from laughing so hard.
I didn’t want to look anywhere else.
I’d take ten fish slaps in the face every day to see her like this.
Ten speckled trout later, seven by her count alone, I pulled our boat next to Sea King and anchored.
We caught a glimpse of Robby leaning over the back of the boat.
“Oh no.” Sam was trying not to smile.
Captain Harold walked along the railing and leaned over to us chuckling to himself. “Haven’t had one puking this much since Dolores. Turned out she was ten weeks pregnant and didn’t even know it. Wouldn’t think the same excuse applies to your boy over there, though.”
Robby heaved again. Some sea legs he had.
“Oh, look! It’s Captain Handsome!” Shirley called out from the deck of the boat, waving her hands at me like an octopus.
“Look what she got!” Gail yelled overboard pointing to Ethel as she held up a decent-sized Spanish mackerel. “Reeled it in all by herself.”
Ethel smiled proudly as Captain Harold came up behind her and gave a thumbs-up. My heart soared. All of her four-foot self was beaming. I had hoped they’d have some luck. Captain Harold had spent over fifty years on the water and tracked the fish like he was one of them.
“The bugger didn’t have a fighting chance once this little lady got her eyes on it.”
Gail had her camera out snapping away, catching every moment she could.
“I haven’t caught anything yet,” Shirley sang as she danced around the deck, “but Captain Harold dubbed me the official host of the boat. I’ve kept drinks filled, bellies full, and spirits up.”
“We’ve caught more fish in an hour than my whole charter yesterday.”
Shirley waltzed over the side of the boat and leaned over a bit to loud-whisper to me. “He says I’m the good luck charm.”
“I might hire her full time just to have her prance around the boat all morning calling to these fish. I’m telling you, they come to her.”
“They can’t help but hear her voice decibel. You know, kinda like dogs.” Gail rolled her eyes and got a close-up picture of Ethel and her mackerel. These ladies were a riot.
I helped Sam onto his boat and introduced her to everyone. Captain took a peek over at our boat and noticed the haul we got for the morning.
“Now, don’t you be talking about your count in front of my guests. You’ll make ’em jealous. No one can hold a candle to this guy and his captaining skills.”
“She’s got seven notches on her belt already this morning and it has nothing to do with me,” I countered.
He lowered his voice to Sam but I could still hear. “Don’t let him hoodwink you. He’s the best fishing captain you’ll meet in this channel, let alone this coast.”
All three ladies were huddled up in a group staring at Sam and whispering, no doubt sizing up Sam’s future wife score.
“The best? Coming from you that’s saying a lot.”
“I’ll never leave the water for good, but the moment my nephew wants to chase his real dream, the fishing business is all his. Always has been.”
Her eyes flicked to me filled with questions. I hadn’t told her Captain Harold was my uncle, but if I drew her a family tree of the island, it’d take a while.
The sound of shuffling feet snagged my attention as Robby’s green face poked around from the back of the boat. He saw me and straightened his back a bit.
“Looking a little green in the gills there, sailor.”
“Aaron, good to see you didn’t sink your dinghy.” Robby swayed just a bit, fighting to steady himself.
“It’s Austin.”
“Yeah, for sure.” He walked toward Sam on wobbly legs. “Ready to catch some big fish, Leigh?”
“Are you sure you’re okay? You look a little queasy.”
“I’m great. Just need a little sunshine.” He held in a burp and grabbed the side rail. “Much better now that you’re here.”
I gritted my teeth as Shirley and the ladies started whispering.
Ethel’s voice rang out over the others. “Well, I for one love a good pissing contest.”