Page 21 of Anxious Hearts

‘Just when I thought you couldn’t be any more of a fucking genius, you go and do that!’

‘I didn’t do anything,’ Kelly said to Juliana.

Juliana held out her phone, the screen showing Kelly’s Instagram account. DMs and comments were flooding in. ‘You’re now a feminist icon as well. Keep this up and you’ll be a bloody saint by Easter Sunday.’

Finn was standing beside Kelly. ‘I don’t understand,’ he said. ‘We didn’t kiss.’

‘More’s the pity, hey, big fella?’ Juliana said.

Finn stared at her, dumbfounded. ‘What?’

She led them through the backstage area and then outside. The sun immediately stung Kelly’s cheeks and she raised a hand to shield her eyes. They stood at the edge of the car park, huddled like a small football team about to head onto the pitch.

‘Listen,’ Juliana said. ‘That Gerry Carpenter is a sleazeball. Everybody knows it, but people still love him anyway. It’s one of the many clear reasons why the human race cannot survive forever. We’re just not smart enough.’

Kelly exchanged a glance with Finn, who clearly thought Juliana was a lunatic.

‘So, when you refused to dance to his tune of female objec-tification, the online feminists went berserk!’

‘Objectification?’ Kelly said. ‘Because he thought we should kiss?’

‘Because he orchestrated the kiss. He turned you into an object of desire, an object to be observed and dehumanised by the male gaze.’

Finn shifted uncomfortably.

Juliana placed a hand on his arm. ‘It’s all right, darling. Nobody’s suggesting you did anything wrong. Kelly pulled the pin in time.’

‘But I didn’t do anything wrong,’ Finn said.

‘You know that’s not the point.’

Finn conceded the argument with a nod and a sigh.

Although Kelly had almost no idea what this conversation was about, she didn’t have the luxury of hanging around to learn more. She’d already lost enough study time today.

‘Finn, we’ve got to go.’

‘Wait, you came together?’ Juliana said.

‘Yeah.’

‘That won’t do. It’ll compromise your position.’

‘I don’t have a position.’

‘You do now, honey. Feminist warrior.’

Warrior. Kelly ran her left thumb across Finn’s name on her right wrist. She stopped before Juliana could notice and ask her any invasive questions.

‘Listen, Juliana, I appreciate all your help, but Finn and I are old friends. We came together in his car and we’re leaving together in his car. End of story.’

Juliana placed a hand on Kelly’s shoulder. ‘Oh, no, honey. This story is just beginning.’

***

They drove in silence. Finn had a million things to say but didn’t know which to say first. He was worried about Kelly.

Worried about putting her in a difficult position.

Worried about how he might have affected her job, which would affect the way she could treat kids, which could mean some of them didn’t get the treatment they needed, which meant …

‘Stop it,’ Kelly said.

Finn looked at her out of the corner of his eye. She hadn’t even turned to face him.

‘Stop what?’

‘Thinking. I can hear it from here. Everything’s fine, Finn.’

Finn gripped the steering wheel. ‘I’m sorry about all that, Kel. I didn’t know it was going to happen.’

‘That’s why I said everything’s fine.’

But it wasn’t fine. Not really. For the first time in a decade, he had almost broken their vow. He had come so close, been so swept up, wanted it so much, that he had almost kissed her again. He had to say it. Had to get the weight off his conscience.

‘I’m sorry I nearly kissed you.’

Kelly stiffened. ‘It’s not your fault. I know you didn’t want to any more than me.’

Finn exhaled. She was right, of course. He hadn’t spent ten years training himself not to desire every part of her just so he could break the discipline for a cheap publicity stunt on live television.

He’d been swept up in Gerry Carpenter’s nonsense.

But now that they were away from the lights and the makeup and the cameras, they were just them again. Kelly and Finn. Nothing more.

Just Kelly and Finn.

By the time they returned to Finn’s apartment car park, they’d both relaxed. ‘I’ll just grab my bag and use the bathroom before I go,’ Kelly said as they stepped out of the car.

Finn nodded and she took off while he grabbed his own bag out of the boot and locked the car. He rode the lift alone and when it opened on his floor, Ashley was heading for his apartment.

‘Ashley,’ he called.

She pulled up short and spun around. ‘Finn?’ she said, as though it couldn’t possibly be him.

‘Are you okay?’ he said.

‘Yeah, I just … I thought I already heard you come home, that’s all. I was coming to say hello.’

Finn smiled. ‘Well, hello.’

She relaxed her shoulders and smiled. ‘Somebody definitely went into your apartment, Finn. So you’re probably being robbed right now.’

‘It was just Kelly.’

‘You’ve been with Kelly today?’

‘We were on the Care for our Kids Telethon. It was a short appearance to try to drum up some donations. Not exactly riveting television. Kelly’s just grabbing her stuff and then heading home.’

‘Her stuff?’

‘Her bag. She met me here and we went in together.’

‘Right. Your friend Kelly.’

They stood in silence, staring at each other. Ashley smiled and placed her hand on his upper arm. ‘I like you, Finn. But be honest with me. Am I wasting my time here?’

Her touch. Again. It did something to him he had thought only Kelly could ever do. He smiled back at her. ‘You’re not wasting your time at all.’